19: Of Sickness and Love and Why You Shouldn't Kiss in a Hospital

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19: Of Sickness and Love and Why You Shouldn't Kiss in a Hospital

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recap: Quentin finally tries to become Ryder's friend. Ryder and April have a heart to heart talk, and Ryder tells her more about himself and his status as the 'bad boy'. Ryder takes April to see his friend.

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The hospital always scared the lights out of me.

There had been something so daunting about seeing everything in white. White walls, people with white robes, white seats, and white door. Even the smell of medicines and drugs and the doctors made me think of white.

But Ryder swept through the hospital halls like he knew every nook and corner.

I didn't really dare to look up from my old Crocs, but I could always hear people shuffling, walking, pleading to doctors about the condition of their child, partner, friends. The waiting room was like a worse version of hell, which is purgatory, because even though it's quiet on the most part, the depression that radiated there was just so overwhelming.

Thank God that the nurse came and told Ryder that we could visit the room of Ryder's friend fast, because my neck had been cramping from too much bowing.

When we got to the (another) white room, I saw Linda, thinner and paler and balder than ever, lying on a thin hospital bed.

"Hi, Gorgeous," Ryder greeted her by giving her a peck on the cheek. Linda giggled, although her voice came out raspy and weak.

"Hi, Linda," I said to her. "You look thinner and not in a good way."

"See?" Linda stretched her cracky lips into what could have been a gentle smile. "The girl doesn't lie to me like you did."

"Hey, it still made you smile," Ryder said. "How are you feeling?"

"Ugh. The nurses here are impossible. They always bring crappy food and they're always in crappy feelings, and since I can't bring myself up on my own, they will always know when I need to take a crap."

"Great, you're still familiar with bad uses of pun, so I guess I don't need to worry much."

Linda punched Ryder's arm lightly. With the amount of mass that she had in her body, I doubted that it would feel anything, but Ryder flinched anyway.

I couldn't help feeling that their friendship was far deeper than mine with Ryder, and it made me took a step back from them.

I think the stepping back thing was way too obvious for both of them, because both Ryder and Linda were looking at me like I was about to commit a crime.

"What are you doing? Come here, Kitten" Ryder took my hand and brought my closer to Linda. "You remember her, right?"

"Oh yes," despite the wrinkles and paper-thin skin, there was something beautiful at Linda's smile. "The girl from Nerdville who doesn't speak Femaleville."

"But if you're familiar with Star wars or Conan Doyle (1), I can talk to you," I said meekly. "You seem like a nice person and you're Ryder's friend so I reckon I need to be nice to you."

Ryder responded to this by wrapping his arm on the back of my head and brought over his lips to my temple. "Thanks."

"Ah, you two look good together," Linda gushed. "What are you doing here? Get out here and take her to a nice restaurant. You have my car, right?"

"I just want to visit you first. You're okay, right?"

"It's just the Sickness coming back at me," she said dismissively. "I fought it and won years ago. I can win it again."

"I do hope so."

"How's your father doing?"

There was a slight pause as Ryder weighed her question. "He still has all of his hair. He doesn't want to take any of his medication."

"Give him a break, Ryder. Having cancer is hard and expensive. I'm sure he has his own reasons for not wanting medication."

"I hate that word."

"Cancer?"

"Cancer."

At this point, they were all suddenly quiet and I was left there, grasping for both air and words. The situation had taken a sullen turn and everything was emotional and Ryder had this look on his face that made him look like he was ready to either cry or punch someone. I was afraid of this kind of Ryder.

Five minutes later (although it did feel like five hundred hours later), a big guy came through the door and started screaming.

"LITTLE SISTEERR!!!!"

The scream was deafening and for a moment I thought that the big guy was going to kidnap us all and place us in a basement for an impossible amount of ransom, but after I blink, I realized him as Billy, another of Ryder's friends.

"Seriously, Billy. Your voice is bad for my eardrums," for some reason, Ryder had had a pair of earplugs inside his ears. He took them off and did a complicated version of bro-fist with Billy.

"Hey, brother," Linda looked up to him. "No, don't get close. Your beard is razor-like."

If Billy was offended with the remark about the nature of his hair, he didn't show it. There was a set of yellowed teeth beneath those bush of black curls, and when those teeth were directed to me, I nearly jumped in shock.

"Wet Girl! I haven't seen you for so long!"

I could see from my peripheral vision that Ryder was shoving his face on his palm.

"So you're with her, now, eh?"

"Sorta," Ryder said as he looked at me. "Are we?"

"We are?"

"I guess?"

"Are you sure?" I asked back.

"Really?" he looked exasperated.

I looked at him in confusion. "I'm looking at you in confusion."

"You don't need to tell me in what nature you're looking at me, Kitten."

"Oh, right. You're the one who should do that to me, because most of the time, I can't make out what you're feeling."

Linda whispered to Billy. "Is that sarcasm?"

"I'm still figuring that out," Billy answered.

"What? You're saying that you can't figure out my face?" Ryder was now the one looking at me in confusion. "It's my face. You've been stuffing your face into my face for a couple of weeks now and you still can't figure out my face?"

I was actually quite amazed with how many faces he could bring up in a single sentence. "Now I know you're confused, but there are times when things are quite a blur to me."

"Like what?"

"Like, most of the time when you're about to kiss me. We were just talking or doing something totally unrelated, like watching TV. And then all of a sudden you have this... this intense 'I have to make out' look and it all came out out of nowhere."

At this point, Ryder's face reddened, but I wasn't sure if it was because of him being mad or embarrassed.

"It's not sarcasm," Linda confirmed to her brother.

Billy snickered. "I'm sure as hell enjoying this."

"You can't blame me if I get excited in random times, especially if I'm living in your bedroom and you're so-" Ryder looked at me, and I looked at his eyebrows, because I couldn't look into eyes easily, and he liked the illusion of us staring at each other in the eye. For him, it was romantic, not straining.

"April, are you looking at my eyebrows again?"

Oops. "Um... "

"Stop biting your bottom lip."

"Okay," I tried to stop.

"Oh, you know what?" he didn't let me answer his question and instead leant over and whispered to me. "I want to stuff my face into your face right now."

There. The off-putting message. It sent a jab into my consciousness and right at that moment, I felt like both Yoda and Blair Waldorf (2) had taken prisoner of my mind in a very complicated mix.

"Me, too," I whispered back.

And then he squeezed my hand and after a simple excuse to the siblings, we got out from the room. The hallways were empty, thankfully, and Ryder put me up against the wall and pressed his lips against mine. His mouth moved around mine in a way that I wouldn't have thought would make me feel like this. There was an overwhelming amount of tingles all around my body that almost made me explode, and the only cure of it was his lips, the inside of his mouth, and the way his hand supported me so I wouldn't fall.

"You're just so adorable," he whispered to my ears, sending shivers.

"Looking at us is a doctor," I said back to him, all Yoda and zero Blair.

Behind Ryder, a tall, eldery man dressed in a thick white coat was watching us in narrowing eyes. "Excuse me, but the visiting hours to Ms. Linda Keyes is over, but clearly you haven't using your time to visit her properly." There was a small smile to accompany his last sentence, but I didn't think that the doctor's smile was meant to comfort us.

"Hey, Billy," Ryder opened the door and called out for the big guy. "We need to take off."

"Aw, man, already?" Billy groaned.

The uptight doctor only kept a poker face. I think I might like him.

Ryder and I went back to the room to say goodbye, and he hugged Linda. There was a pang on my chest as soon as I saw him touch her, but I deemed it as just another Weird Thing Ryder Caused Me. They seemed to hug for quite a while, though, and when it was my turn, I was at loss on what to do.

"Come on here," Linda encouraged, and I leant closer to her. She smelled like the hospital. She smelled white.

"I'm so glad that Ryder finds you," she said as she wrapped her bony arms around me. I didn't really like her touching me without permission, but she looked sick and she was Ryder's friend, so I had to let her. "Please stand by him. He needs it. He needs someone to just love him."

And somehow, deep down, I knew that. I knew exactly what she was talking about.



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Glossary:

(1) Conan Doyle: (sorry, some people just don't know who he is) the original author of Sherlock Holmes.

(2) Blair Waldorf: a character from Gossip Girl. Foxy girl.

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The Bad Boy Lives in My Room #3 - Studying

It was 12:05 but I was still awake, an hour late from my normal sleeping schedule and most probably won't be sleeping anytime soon.

I was studying.

I couldn't believe that it would take this much time to study Calculus and The Theory of Relativity (the latter is for the friendship purpose, because Corrine texted me that we would be discussing about that tomorrow). I mean, I started right after I got home from school earlier, and ever since then, my butt had been glued into the chair. The only time I ever moved was when my butt took the message from the gastric acid in my stomach and demanded me to go to the bathroom.

At 12:20, Ryder climbed up my window and even though he was possibly tipsy, was surprised to see me still up and running.

"Before you say anything," I preceded him. "I'm studying and you smell like an old person's beer."

"You and your blatant stereotyping," Ryder laughed it off anyway, and went to the bathroom.

Around fifteen minutes later, I was still stuck with the same page and he was already out and only wore half of his clothes.

"Anything I can help you with? I'm pretty good with studies." He tapped the side of his head. "Brain like a nerd, body like a sex god."

"Face like a CW (1) tv characters," I added, because he did look like he belonged with Chace Crawford (2) and the rest of the team. "Anyway, you might be able to help me if you put on clothes."

He smirked. "Yeah? There's no law that indecent exposure is punishable in this house." I was racking my brain on how to own that up when the smell of his (my) shampoo wafted from my behind. Before long, I could feel his body right beside me.

"Is it OK if I hug you from behind?"

"I-It's going to be distracting," I said quietly. "But it's okay. But only for ten seconds, because I need to go back to my studies."

He wrapped his arms around my neck and rested his chin on my shoulder. "Why are you reading this book?"

"Marcy and Corrine will talk about this tomorrow. They sail through these chemistry things like they're comic books and the only way i can keep up with their conversations is if I study about it beforehand."

Despite the appalled look on Ryder's face, he asked me anyway. "Want me to tutor you?"

It was already beyond ten seconds, but for some reason, I didn't want him to stop hugging me. I touched his forearm, feeling the hard muscles constrict and tilted my head to the direction of his head. "That'd be great."

We studied until it was four in the morning. When I woke up, it was the first time Ryder hadn't already gotten ready. I let him sleep a little while longer, before then I opened the window before I went to school so that he could climb down when he woke up.

Both Marcy and Corrine, however, were absent in school that day.



Holy dam, those two.

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(1): CW: a tv network that surely LOVES to get the most good looking people to stars on their tv show.

(2): just google him. you're welcome.

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This is a calm chapter. Super calm even, compared to the previous ones. You know the drill. Calm before storm. The next one will be interesting (very, in fact) because it will contain April properly going to a party that was promised in the last chapter. Woot. I originally wanted to put that into this chapter, but it won't be fitting, trust me.



And thank you thank you thank you for the support for this story. I love you guys. I've just went a lot lately, and you guys are like, the constant thing that I have in my life. I really appreciate it <3

pimping starts here: If you want another teen fiction story about a girl who was ugly and humiliated and got hot and get revenge in a totally dramatic manner, please check out my new story, Frankly My Dear, All's Fair in Love and War. It's got a gossip girl feel and definitely darker than this story. And it's very exciting to write. Check out the external link, or just simply go to my profile page. pimping stops here.

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