Behind Closed Curtains (Desires of the Forbidden)

Chapter 5

Pic up top of Zach!

It had been three days, and I still hadn't heard a thing from the casting.

I had been anxiously waiting, keeping my phone by me day and night waiting for that call and still, nothing. I knew that the director said we would know within a week but usually, if they knew what they wanted you would know within the first couple days.

As I woke up Tuesday morning, I went through my normal, mundane routine per usual with the thought and acceptance that I hadn't gotten the role.

I moved around the house, completing my normal chores with a cloud of depression looming over me. The coffee, I burnt, far too engrossed within my own morbid thoughts. I cut my yoga workout short, my body giving out half way through. I ended up laying on my back in the living room, staring up at the ceiling aimlessly as I let the yoga tape continue playing in the background like white noise.

An unexpected call from my father helped sooth my anxiety for a short-lived moment. He never really called much since he moved away after I graduated high school, but I didn't blame him.

I knew most everything about me, my face, my voice, my odd quirks reminded him of my mother.

Some reminders are too painful to bear and for my father, anything that revolved around my mother was a trigger into depression for him.

He never accepted her death and refused to properly heal. Some losses are too great a pain to recover from; the hollow ache in your chest a permanent memory of what you'd once had and never will again.

Unfortunately, mere minutes after hanging up with my father, the daunting misery over the role that I was sure I had lost out on came rushing back.

Was I used to being disappointed and not getting what I wanted?

Yes.

Yet, this time was different. I wanted this one and I wanted it badly. I even felt as though my callback went exceptionally well aside from the intimate mishap with my acting partner.

Kaleb.

I mentally kicked myself for thinking his name as I stirred my spoon around in circles in the Alfredo linguine I was making for dinner. That man... that forward, crass, damnably attractive man had been occupying far too many of my thoughts since that audition than should be allowed.

Something about him confused me and enthralled me all at once. Everything about Kaleb was entrancing and different; and different was dangerous.

I was thankfully brought out of my endless thoughts about Kaleb when I heard keys jingle from outside and the front door swing open.

Setting the spoon down, I spun on my heel and placed my hands gingerly behind my back and waited for Zach to walk in; a position that I had become accustomed to staying in for the last couple years whenever Zach arrived home from work.

I forced my lips to rise into a sweet grin as Zach's handsome figure rounded the corner and stepped into the kitchen, still clad in his business attire.

"Hey, babe," he said with a crooked smile as he placed his briefcase down onto the counter top and loosened his tie around his neck.

As always, I physically readied myself as Zach took a few, wide steps towards me and went to plant a kiss on my cheek. This action had been a daily ritual for the most part so I was generally used to it. Yet, as I felt the muscles in my shoulder tighten as he inched closer, I knew I would never fully be prepared for his touch.