My Own Way

Chapter 21

Chapter 21

I was sitting on the couch with Anne as she told me everything she had thought about since we were kids.  It was easy to see that I had broken the trust between us and it saddened me.

"All these years, everyone has been lying to me...to my sister." She said with tears running down her face while looking at the floor.

"I'm so sorry Anne, but do you honestly think you would have understood everything if we would have told you?" I asked her.

She grabbed another tissue from the box that was beside her only to add it with the mountain of used tissue she was collecting on her lap.

"Probably not when I was younger but when I told you about...him, you could have told me.  Instead I made myself look like a complete moron." She said between her teeth.

"I know I should have but... I'm sorry." I said again.

I had lost count of how many times I had said 'I'm sorry' in the past thirty minutes since she had arrived.  None of them helped her or me.  They just seemed lost in space somehow.

"He doesn't even talk to me anymore." She said finally looking at me.  "He doesn't even look at me."  She added.

"He wanted information and he was using you to get it.  Would you rather have him pretend to be your friend when he doesn't want to be?" I asked.  I knew it was a cruel thing to say but it was the truth.

"I never thought he was pretending…  I think you told my dad about Jesse and my dad told you what he wanted you to tell him…for him to stay away from me."

"Yeah, you're right.  I did tell your dad and he did tell me he was worried because Jesse didn't have your best interest at heart.  Your dad wanted to protect you and not see you hurt, so did I." I told her, starting to lose my patience.

"Well you were both wrong because I am hurt." She said.  The hurt in her eyes and voice showed so much.  To know that I was behind that pain… it twisted my heart.

"I'd rather see you hurt this way than learning the truth months from now or God forbid that he would have been somewhat like his father.  I would never want you in a situation like my mom and I were.  So, what do you think is better?" I asked her, clearly showing my irritation in my voice.

"He would never do that to me." She said keeping eye contact.

"Funny, my mom said the same thing about his dad." I said right back.

She put her head down and I could see her tears falling from her cheeks.

"We love you.  We'd never want anything bad to happen to you.  We probably went at it the wrong way but... we just wanted you safe." I told her bring my voice down, trying to smooth things over.