Disequilibrium

Part 4: Senior Year - Scene 13

Sheila has turned me blonde.

We both stare at my reflection in the bathroom mirror for a while, unsure what to make of it. Her fingers are in the strands, running through them as she pretends not to be staring at my eyes, but I know she is. I don't care. The only things I can focus on are the blonde tips.

We stay like that for a while, one of her hands on my bare shoulder and the other running through my hair. Then, finally, after a while of constricting silence, she cracks a smile. "I knew you'd make a cute blonde. You'll get used to it soon enough. One small step to a new you, remember?"

I remember. So I smile back at her even though smiling is the last thing I want to do right now and get up from the stool, turning around so I can give her a proper hug. "Thanks for this. I mean, for everything. I know we probably shouldn't have but—"

"Let's not." She backs away from me, and I almost laugh. She's backing away from me. "I've got a raging migraine right now, but I'm still craving eggs. Are you? I can whip some up before you leave—"

"I've really got to get back and figure things out, Sheila." Her name in my mouth feels strange for some reason. "I need to sort out where I'm headed and what I'm going to do. I hope you understand."

Her smile falls for a split second but comes back tighter than ever, looking so forced and unnatural that even I want to back away. "Sure, yeah, of course. That makes sense. Are you sure you don't want anything for the road? Some coffee or—"

"Actually, if it isn't too much to ask, I was wondering if you could lend me some cash. My friend promised me some money, but I don't know where he's been. So can you help me out? Please? I don't mean to be one of those guys, but I'm in a real tight spot right now."

I try to make my voice soft—the same voice I used last night—to make her believe the absurd story, but now her smile is completely gone. She stares at me for a moment, blinks, then turns around so I can't see her face anymore. Even so, I can still spot the jagged breaths she takes when her shoulders rise and fall unevenly.

Then she says, "You did it for money?"

"What?"

"Did you only come here for money?"

"What? Of course not! I'd never do that! Look, it makes me sick asking this of you. I really don't want you to think that way of me. But you've got to understand—it was unplanned, yeah? I didn't expect to be here last night, and I can't get stranded on the road because of it." I take a step towards her. "Come on, Sheila. You've got to understand."

There's more than enough gas in my tank, but I still keep that sincere look on my face. She still doesn't look so sure, so my mind instantly goes to plan B. There's a set of small scissors by the sink she used to cut my split ends; if I'm fast enough, I can grab them and get to her before she can even think of what to do. Hell, I can probably take her with my bare hands. Make less of a mess. I did it with Aaron, after all. I can do it again.

But then she turns around with a bittersweet smile on her face, and it almost makes me a little disappointed. "Yeah, I get it. Don't worry," she says, then moves towards a wooden nightstand at the side of the king sized bed. She opens a drawer, flips through it, and then pulls out a golden-laced wallet. "I've got about a hundred in here. Is that enough?"

My smile grows wider as she hands me the cash even though I'm still thinking of the scissors. "Yes, that's perfect. Thank you so much. You're an angel." And then, out of nowhere, I say, "You know what, breakfast sounds good right now. I can stay a little longer if you want me to. Do you want me to?"

Sheila blinks a couple more times as if in shock by what I said. She opens her mouth, shuts it, then closes her eyes completely and puts a gentle hand on her temple. "You know, I think it's best for you to leave."