The Last Dance (Nathan/Jay fanfic)

Chapter 7

**Saffron's POV**

I heard the sounds a car come to a halt outside Jay's flat, slightly muffled by the pounding sounds of the raindrops thundering down and pelting the window panes. To be honest, I wasn't really looking forward to when Nathan came back, for that was surely him outside wasn't it? He was bringing his new girlfriend home. I wished more than anything that my car hadn't broken down. I mean, why now? Out of all the times it could've broken, it chooses to do so now. Ugh, life. I sighed to myself.

The reason I was feeling all this negativity was because I knew, deep down, after talking briefly with Nathan earlier this afternoon, that I couldn't control my feelings for him any longer. Despite how hard I tried. But I'm Jay's girlfriend, I'm supposed to love him. But I do love him, but just not in a romantic way. I love him like a friend. He makes me laugh and he is adorable. But I know that the boy who I truly love, is Nathan Sykes, and I know that I can't have him.

I'm being such a selfish bitch. I thought to myself. Who says yes to one guy when she already has feelings for one of his best friends? I guess I just didn't want to hurt Jay. I guess I was just so scared about hurting his feelings if I had said no to him that day. But now I'm going to have to hurt him even more when I tell him I can't go out with him anymore. I'm dreading that moment and still trying to pluck up the courage to do it. But I just can't bear the thought of him being sad. He's such a funny, kind, caring and laughable character, I just can't picture how sad he'll look when I tell him. I can just see it now, his head will drop down and his curls will scatter across his forehead, hiding the emotion in his eyes from me. And then when he'll look at me, his piercing bright blue eyes will be filled with sadness and - ugh I hate myself for what I'm going to have to do.

"Saff you alright?" Jay said to me suddenly, and I realise we've been sitting in silence for quite a while.

"Yeah, yeah," I replied, subdued, "just a little tired and a bit pissed off about my car." I'm not lying, I thought quietly to myself, that's the truth - just not all of it.

"Aw don't worry, I'm sure it'll be fixed sometime soon. I'll give you a lift home back to your house though if you need it."

"Thanks," I replied, shooting him a small smile,

"But just stay here a little while longer though? Nathan and his new girl will be back any moment now."

"I think they're already here," I told him, and just as those words escaped my mouth, we both heard the front door open and a gust of cold air came whooshing up the corridor into the living room and sent shivers down my spine. The door clicked shut and I heard heavy footsteps and voices trailing up the hallway. Then they entered the room.

God she was pretty, outstandingly pretty, and I could see why Nathan had gone for her if he liked her looks. She was small, a petite frame, long and straight glossy black hair like a raven, a few delicate freckles dotted on her nose and very dark blue oval eyes.

"Hiya Jay, Saff," Nathan said, nodding a hello to us, "guys, this is Jenny. Jenny this is Jay and his girlfriend Saffron, although more commonly know as Saff," he said, introducing us to one another and giving me a little wink at the end - which sent butterflies whizzing around in my stomach. Why did he do that? I groaned inwardly to myself.

Jenny said hello to us and seemed polite at the start, although as we all settled down on the sofa together I ended up inbetween Jay and Nathan, with Jenny on the other side of Nath. I tried to stop a blush from creeping up into my cheeks but failed miserably. I just hope no one noticed. The conversation was light and easy-going, although Jenny didn't really speak to me, and when she did her voice sounded almost cold. I felt like she was accusing me of something, but what?