10 months, 10 chances || Minsung

13

When Jisung got out of the room Aera came walking towards him.

"Jisung you did so well"

He appreciated that but he couldn't concentrate on anything else than the question that was burning in his throat to come out.

"What happens now? I don't know where to go"

"I searched for different foster parents or homes but it seems like most of the homes don't have any more space and at the moment there are no people around that are up for it, only some hours away if that would be an option for you" Aera really did some research, not only because it's her job but because she started caring for Jisung the moment he talked to her.

For Jisung it sounded like he would end up on the street now, he knew some of his friends would at least suggest him to stay with them for some days. But it's Jisung, he would never taker that offer because he wouldn't want to bother them. But he also wouldn't want to go away from his friends, especially now that he started to open up at least a little to Minho. He started to feel comfortable around him and he wouldn't want that to go away.

"Do I have to go?"

Thinking about leaving made him sad, so he took Minho's hand so he could hold onto him as long as he can.

"Actually, there would be another solution but only if you're comfortable with it" she didn't plan on asking that, especially because she couldn't make that decision alone, but being emotional took the best of her so she continued.

"My husband and I could take care of you, we tried to adopt because I can't get pregnant myself but apparently we're not qualified for that and I think it would be a good idea since we don't live far from here and you could stay in the city"

To say he was speechless was an understatement, of course he doesn't want to bother Aera and her husband but she said herself that they wanted to adopt. So he quickly made a pro contra list in his head.

"Really? But I don't wanna bother you" he would want to but the thought about him being a burden is kinda destroying it.

Long story short: Aera reassured him that it would be okay if he stayed with them and after he said yes she talked to her husband, which led them to now getting Jisung's stuff out of his house and preparing their guest room.

And because he was so occupied with the whole process of moving in with Aera and her husband Yijun and the whole court thing, Minho, Changbin and Felix totally caught him off guard when they talked about their presentation during lunch.

"Presentation?" was the first thing he asked, he didn't really work on it because he simply had other things to worry about, so that he didn't help a single bit, made him feel really guilty.

"Yes don't worry, I took your part since we worked together anyway" while he says that Minho shoves some papers to Jisung "I prepared notes for you, I asked if it's okay for you to not present but she insisted on it. I'm sorry I totally forgot to tell you, but we gave you the least and if you read through it now, it shouldn't be a problem, right?"

Jisung was really thankful for that, but because of him they had to work more and since he couldn't really prepare he will probably fuck it up.

"Thank you so much" then he took the notes to prepare himself, more mentally than with the notes.

So what if he would ruin it for them, would they be mad? Would he push their grade down? What if he does something so embarrassing, that they won't like him after that?

Time passed with his thoughts running wild and making him more anxious, that he didn't notice when the bell rung so Minho strokes over his arm making him look up.

"Are you ready? You're not the first to talk so you can still look at the notes a bit. If I remember it right it's Felix then Changbin and after him you so I can end it"

After Jisung nods they all made their way to the class they have, and since they're going to be the first one to present they didn't even go to their tables they just stopped in front of the class, Jisung nervously fiddling with his fingers.

He started to read through his notes, the first time at all and tried to get as much as possible in his brain so he wouldn't stand there like a stuttering mess.

But the time he tried to get it all in, is he even good enough to do that? By the point where he was starting to overthink it again Changbin looked at him, he was already finished with his part so Jisung had to get it together, it's just saying some words it can't be that bad, right?

Wrong. Everyone was staring at him. His cheeks got reddish eventually and he started sweating, not that he didn't before but it's only now that he noticed. He must look weird, what do they think? That he's disgusting? Weird? Fat? A mix of everything? Or that he's a wimp because he's shaking so bad?

But just before he's almost done, he got so nervous he always stumbled over the smallest words which almost put him into an anxiety attack.

"I'm sorry, excuse me" he couldn't do that in front of everyone, it seemed way easier to just go into the next bathroom that he could be alone. In that moment he didn't care about their grade, he just needed to hide and he could do that best when he's locked in a bathroom stall away from any human being.

(just a short tw untillll-)

With a racing heart and his eyes tearing up he got the only thing out of his pocket that could calm his mind.

When he looked at the little blade he instantly felt relief and pulled his sleeve up to drag it over his skin. As soon as he felt the burning sensation of his skin opening and the warm liquid escaping and running down his wrist, he let out a sigh and leaned his head back onto the wall, closing his eyes, just purely enjoying the feeling he missed so much.

When he wanted to add another cut, he heard the door open.

(here)

He stopped in his tracks and listened, if he could hear who it is just from the footsteps.

Then someone knocked at the stall door and when the person said his name, his eyes immediately shot wide open.