TWISTED THOUGHTS(# 1)

DAHLIA HARPER

" Lia, is something bothering you about the meeting?" Marco say to me as he was driving me to the meeting spot. " Your knuckles are so white."

I glance towards my knuckles which were white like all the blood had drained out of them.

" It is just my nervousness. I don't know if i would love my publicist or not." I made an excuse.

"It is going to be okay and you can change him if you don't like him. But is it really the matter?" Marco's expressions said it all. He don't believe me. He know me very well in such a small time. That is another thing that tugs at my heart.

He know I am making an excuse. I am not being myself since the morning. Today in the morning while having breakfast, I dropped a full glass of coffee on myself. I was not talking much. I was fidgety and worried. My mind is filled with all the possibilities that could be and most of them are bad.

I making an excuse to myself that probably my publicist have a voice like Roland but still it wouldn't help me that much at the very end. I was trying (and failing) to move on from my past and if I will have a publicist with a same voice like Roland, it would only get worse and worse.

What if it is Roland and-

I don't want to go there.

.

" We are here Lia." Marco opened the door for me to get out.

" Thanks for the ride, dear."

" You don't need to thank me , diamond. And is everything alright or it is just being nervous?" Marco is still pressing me to tell him what the matter is .

But I can't.

I hate to keep it a secret from everyone.

Especially him and my parents.

"Marco, I am fine. Don't worry and drive safely." He slightly dipped his head to kiss me." Don't kiss me here or a word will get out and dad will kill you. I want to live with you so many years."

I wanted his lips on mine but I knew that what is gonna happen if people saw him kissing me. I don't want to keep it a secret from public but I want to tell our families first. I wouldn't be able to handle dad and Uncles if the news burst out first. I had urged Marco to don't drop me but he didn't. And also I was like a daughter for Uncle Dante do this action could be justified as a mere favor.

" I don't care about them. people could talk all they want." He said.

I pushed him back . " But I do care. We need to talk to our families first."

" Let's talk to them today." God, this man.

" Come on, patience is a virtue." I told him sternly like a teacher.

" I never claimed to be virtuous, diamond. Sinning is more fun as you will find out later." He gave me a wink that made me realize his meaning behind it.

A flush crept to my cheeks.

" Okay, enough talk. I need to go and don't you have a company to run." I smiled.

But my smile disappeared as I remember to go onto the meeting which was scaring me to hell.

" My company could run without me not being there for a hour or two." He said lazily oozing casual arrogance."

" Are you ever worried about anything?" I asked. Maybe it would make me feel better

" I take stress but there is only one thing I'm worried about."

" what is it?"

" I am worried about losing you. My only place where I feel like heaven and the luckiest man in the world. My peace. My heart. My soul. I am only worried about you." His steady gaze was burning into mine.