My Possessive C.E.O.

Chapter 21: Metamorphosis

Why was I making things so difficult? I had two options: Stay and figure this out, digging myself deeper in the hole I have unfortunately found myself falling into. Or, I can leave, and let this gorgeous, exhilarating, confusing man remain a mess while I save myself, and my sanity. 

Of course, being the genius that I am, I couldn't bring myself to leave. I decided to stay, only because I have a soft spot for the misunderstood, and my desire to help those desperate in need is my Achilles heel.

Here we go, Carmen. Time to fix what's broken. Or...at least try to. 

"James... what is there to talk about? I mean, isn't it pretty obvious that we don't mix well?" I sit back down on the couch. I haven't even been awake for 30 minutes but I'm already anticipating this conversation will be mentally exhausting. 

"What makes you say we don't mix well? We've barely even gotten to know each other." James responds, with a hint of irritation. 

"Exactly, James... isn't that a red flag to you? We can't even go 1 day without drama, or bursts of fighting, or someone being upset. No relationship, whether it's romantic, platonic, or business,  can survive with that constant stress. I can't.... I can't walk on eggshells for the rest of my life in hopes to make things right with you. I'm sorry...." 

The look in his eyes was so saddening. The equivalent of telling a young boy he can't get his favorite toy at the store for his birthday. Should I have said that? Have I been to honest? My stomach was immediately uneasy seeing his reaction to my statement. I wish I didn't eat that huge breakfast... 

James gets up quickly and starts pacing around the room. I, not sure what to do, remain on the couch staring at the floor, mindlessly twiddling my fingers, which I do when I'm nervous. 

After a few awkward moments of silence, James speaks up. 

"I think we just got off to a bad start..." still pacing around the room, massaging the back of his neck, nerves radiating from his typically strong persona. He seems so out of his element. 

"Ha! A "bad start".... that would be an understatement. Our first encounter was nearly tragic." I reply, with a soft laugh. Hoping to lighten the tense mood staining the atmosphere. 

It worked, James lets out a microscopic smirk, and a soft chuckle. "Ah.... yes... I don't think I've properly apologized for that yet....I'm... uh... I'm terribly sorry for what I did, and what I said. I was out of line, and it wasn't your fault."

He is now directly looking at me, with sense of purpose. He was truly sorry, and his intense stare was making sure I knew he was being genuine. No, it was demanding me to know he was being genuine.

"And... most importantly." He adds "I need you to know that I can never forgive myself for ever making you feel like I would put you in danger. I would do anything I could to protect you." 

As soon as he said those words, his eyes widened, and he instantly added. "Anyone! I meant, I would do anything to protect...anyone..." with a nervous laugh and a go-to stare at the floor to avoid my gaze. 

James Fitzgerald was... nervous?! I couldn't help but escape a smirk of my own. I would do anything to protect you replays in my head. Every girl loves hearing that. I then noticed my eyes were falling. Scanning his, still, shirtless frame. Carmen, now is NOT the time to be turned on...focus! Make things right and get the hell out of his apartment!

I nervously clear my throat. "Thank you for that. I'm also....sorry for what I may have said or done to upset you....I hope you can forgive me as well." I reply, staring at the floor the entire time. 

I was capable of producing a goosebump inducing stare equivalent to his, but I knew the longer I looked in his eyes, the more confusing.... THIS.... would get. I didn't want to risk it. So I also stared at the floor to avoid him.

"You have absolutely nothing to be sorry for, Carmen. It is entirely all my fault. Please know that I am deeply sorry for my actions, and I hope we can still remain friends." 

My heart is racing, screaming "Yes! Yes we can still be friends! More than friends you sexy man!" while my mind is scoffing in retaliation, saying "Carmen, say yes, only so you can get the hell out of here and return to your normal life where you can find a NORMAL guy to fall for. James is what you may want, but he isn't what you need."

"Yes, of course. We can be friends." I look up at him, with a genuine close mouthed smile on my face, and reach my hand out for a handshake. 

What the actual fuck Carmen? A handshake? Who do you think you are, a business associate?

He returns the smile, exposing a dimple I haven't noticed before. Oh my. 

"Friends." He whispers, shaking my hand softly, with enough dominance to remind me that he's the stronger one between us. Literally and figuratively. 

I try to pull away, when, for the second time, I notice he holds on to my hand longer than I expect. 

"Well, good. Everything's cleared up then... I need to get going." I head for the guest bedroom and quickly grab my belongings. As I'm about to head out, James is putting on a shirt and getting ready to walk me out. Part of me gets disappointed seeing his Adonis torso covered and clothed. What a crime.

He leads the way for his front door, and gently opens it. "The elevators on down the left, I have a ride for you outside the lobby to take you home." I look up at him, soaking up his peaceful aura. He seemed so calm today. I like this side of him. He has a gentle smirk on his face, looking so content. I'm sure he's relieved we're on good terms now. I know I am. 

"Thank you for breakfast, James, it was delicious... Have a good day." 

"My pleasure, many more where that came from Ms. Andrews." 

And with a wink, he closes the door. Leaving me in a shamble of butterflies.