The Black Winter

Chapter 1

Joan pov
I had been with the Avengers for about a year now. No one knew who I was, no one except Bucky and Natasha. Hydra hasn't been able to find me, I was finally free from their grasp. The team knows that I was one of their experiments, but what they don't know, is that I was there from the start. Not only that, but they don't know the real me. Like Bucky, I too have a metal arm. However, I always made sure to keep it hidden. I didn't talk unless spoken too, no one bothered me. I liked it that way.

I was on my way to a meeting. It was probably just going to be one of Tony's stupid debriefings. The one's that everybody hates but we all have to go. Half the time, I just sat there and zoned out. Again, no one talked to me. I could tell that they were all secretly afraid of me and what I was capable of. They knew I was apart of hydra and they have seen me in training. Of course though, I had always held back.

Once I finally get to the meeting room, I take a seat near the end of the table. I was wearing black cargo pants and a skin tight black under armor shirt with a leather jacket, and my leather gloves of course. I just told everyone that I had a skin condition due to Hydra's experiments. I was all the way at the end of the table. I am across from Steve and next to Wanda. We all wait there for a few moments, waiting for Tony to come in.

After five or so minutes, he does. He walks in and turns on the tv screen. I cross my arms and legs and turn my attention to the front.

"Hello everybody. Thank you all for being here. I have a mission for us," Tony says. He walks over to the tv and stands off to the side. This was a serious mission. I could tell by the way he stood. "We will be reading a Hydra base. We have found some intel that there is a girl trapped there. Our mission is to save her and then blow up the base," explains Tony.

"Who's the girl?" Natasha asks.

"We're not sure. But it says that she possesses great powers. Our goal is to save her and give her a home. If she posses a threat then we'll just do what we did with tin man here," Tony says, referring to Bucky.

That was another thing. Although Bucky and I knew each other, same with Natal- or Natasha, we never talked. To them, I was just the monster that turned them into monsters. To them, I was the reason that they are the way they are.

"We got intel too that she was apart of a program. It was an old program that they were trying to rebuild," Tony says.

"What was the program called?" Steve asks.

"The Black Winter program."

Immediately, my blood runs cold. I can feel myself straighten up and chills race down my spine. All of the sudden, I can hear screams all around me.

"Y/n? Y/n?" I hear Steve calling my name.

I quickly turn my attention to him.

"You ok?" He asks.

I nod my head yes and try to focus on the mission at hand. The meeting goes on about where it's at and what the objective is. The base was in Russia and the girl was the target. The mission was to save her and we were heading out tonight at 7:30.

After the meeting is over, it's now 2:38. I make my way down to the gym and decide to get in a work out. I needed to blow off some steam after that meeting. After about two hours or so of working out, I was still feeling overwhelmed. So I decided to go for a run. I love running around the cities of New York. There was something about it that just made me forget about the world and how cruel it really was.

By the time I'm done and get back to the tower, it's now 6:43. Meaning I needed to quickly shower and get packed. It never took me long. All I needed was my suit, my guns, my swords, knives, and that was basically it. I always wore my suit when we were going on missions so I didn't have to pack that if I was wearing it.

I get to my room and close the door. I start to undress and grab all my shower stuff. I head into the shower that was attached to my room and I start the water. Making sure that it was as cold as it could get. I hop in and quickly do my business. Once I get out of the shower I wrap myself up in a towel and walk over to the mirror.

I look at myself for a moment, my hands resting against the sink. My pitch black hair was past my butt at this point. Hydra was never one for hair care. They always made sure to dye it, and at this point, I don't even know what my real hair color is any more.

My jawline was sharp and my cheek bones were visible and high. My icey gray eyes had dark circles under neath, due to the lack of sleep. I didn't sleep anymore. Unlike Buchanan, who wanted his memories back, I didn't. All of mine were bad, and all they did was bring back pain and suffering. Not only that but it was hella painful.

I hate looking at myself. It discusses me. I am nothing more than a weapon, a monster, I'm not even a human. Rather a thing that is made to be controlled. And that is what has started to get to me. Not having anyone to tell me what to do. Now that I was free, I didn't know what to do, what to think, or how to act.

I tear my gaze away from the mirror and let go of the sink. I walk out to my room and get dressed into my suit. I put my hair up in a Dutch braid. On the sides of it, are two smaller braids that acted as an outline. There are little strands that outlined my face. Little whisks that never obeyed and always got in the way. It annoyed the hell out of me.

Once I'm all set and ready, I grab my stuff and head out. We all meet up and pack up out things onto the plane. Once everything is packed, we take off. Making our way to Russia.