Soundleasure | Choi San

Chapter 5

After that first contact in real time, it all kept evolving further between them. The conversations were even more frequent -if that was even possible-, having the both of them stuck at their screens at the minimum chance a notification popped up in hopes of it being the other's text. And all those messages throughout the day only finished with one good video call at night, being the last person the other saw -even if it was through a screen. Y/n kept thinking the only possibility for what they had was to keep evolving. More messages, more calls... and it all stopped.

She remembered she was confused at first. San usually took no longer than five minutes to answer her messages, and she kept seeing her text at the end of their conversation, marking the end of the chain of messages. First it was hours, later it was days. Whenever she called, her calls were never answered either, and she couldn't help but worry at the thought of something happening to him.

Until she received that notification she knew so well.

Y/n: Hey??

Y/n: ???

Y/n: Are you there?

Y/n: Did something happen?

Y/n: ...

Y/n: Hello?

Y/n huffed while rereading those texts after a few weeks. She never in her life felt like begging for someone to pay attention to her -not even attention, but have the common decency to tell her he didn't want to have anything to do with her anymore. She didn't care what the reason was, she'd have accepted it and moved on with life. But the fact that he disappeared, out of nowhere, but still was active posting his videos made her blood boil. She even went as far as sending him texts back on his page, just in case he'd read them, but it had the exact same response: nothing. He didn't even read them, or at least it didn't show up for her.

"Do you want to cancel your subscription?"

—He can fuck off if he wants —she mumbled, pressing the small "Yes" on her phone screen.

She clearly wasn't going to keep giving him money in exchange for being ignored. She didn't even try to watch the last four videos he posted, remembering how the only thought going through her head was throwing him the heaviest thing she could find.

It was complicated for her. It made no sense, and that made her more furious.

For the first time since she broke up with her ex boyfriend, and after several awful Tinder dates, she finally managed to connect with someone who made her feel comfortable and at ease. Leaving aside the sexual attraction that was evident through texts, she felt understood by someone that she didn't even meet in person -and it wasn't because she didn't want to.

During one of their video calls, Y/n casually mentioned how much she liked walking past Acorn Street whenever she had to, and how it never bothered to move by feet when she knew the destination would make her walk through it. San's answer was automatic, as if he wasn't thinking what he was saying, when he told her he used to walk past that street when he was younger, but how he hadn't been around that area for so long. When her brain clicked all that information together, and dared to ask if he was also living in Boston, he started stuttering, showing off how nervous that question made him and taking longer to nod and confirm it. While she was excited about the news, and mentioned how they could meet in person one of those days, San simply nodded, desperate to change the topic to something else.

That memory made Y/n scoff, convincing herself that that man was no better than anyone else she had met. He wanted the horniness of masturbating with someone, with enough distance so she wouldn't be a burden for him, and she was planning on changing his comfort zone.