We're back, Baby!
Because I know you're going to ask, my favorite song from the Hazbin Hotel season 1 episodes I've seen is a tie between Looser Baby and Hell's Greatest Dad, with Stayed Gone close behind. Respectless is the one that won't get out of my head though lol.
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Moxxie walked into the prison visitor center confidently wearing a cheap neon orange afro wig, his actual hair poking out the back. He adjusted his fake glasses, and strode confidently with a little white purse, carrying a cardboard box half his size.
"Name, prisoner name and number, and reason for visit." The guard behind the glass at the counter croaked out. He was an imp with a goatee and smelled like cigarettes and nihilism.
"Oh, you know," Moxxie did his best valley girl impression, "just dropping off some goodies for my boyfriend. It's his birthday and I wanted him to feel special."
"Name, prisoner name and number." The guard repeated the first two instructions.
"Anita." He signed, "Anita Dick."
The guard looked up, "Anita Dick? You're sure about that?"
Moxxie grumbled, "It starts with a silent Q." Satan, why did Blitz pick such a dumb name? Stalling for time was one thing, but something had to be said for rousing suspicion.
"Mhm. Prisoner name and number?" the guard simply asked again.
"Mike Rotchburns, 5318008." He said.
"Mike Rotchburns." The guard raised an eyebrow.
"Yes." He said.
"Mike. Rotchburns." He said more slowly.
"Yes, that's his name."
"My crotch burns? Really?" He said.
Moxxie gasped with maximum drama, "Sir, it is entirely inappropriate for you to tell me that, where is your supervisor?"
"On a smoke break. Ma'am, can you pass the box through the opening?" As he spoke, a part of the glass opened up.
He passed it through.
It was then that he finally saw Blitz crawling across the ceiling with plungers like a f**king cartoon. The problem with this strategy is that every time he lifted a hand or foot, a big pop sound echoed in the room.
"Huh?" The man started looking up.
"Wait!" Moxxie shouted at him without thinking.
Great, he was looking at him. Now what?
"Th-the box. It contains some . . . Sensitive objects. Any chance you can . . . Not look in it?" He asked.
He looked at him with a deadpan look, ". . . You're kidding, right-"
Pop!
"Oh, don't worry about that sound. It's my text alert." He said hurriedly, "Anyway, can't you just wave your little scanner thing over it, and call it a day?"
YOU ARE READING
The Pompous and The Prick
RomanceIs it too much to ask for Stolas and Blitzø to have a real relationship? Apparently so. Stolas manages to tell Blitzø that he wants something more, but fails to clarify that he wants something more WITH HIM. Blitzø takes it as a rejection, and their...
