Yayo ~ Isaac Garcia

Chapter 9

A/N: Hey, I decided to update today instead of tomorrow :D
And it's a good idea to check out the playlist of this book, at least for this chapter. But its not essential
(just look up the mentioned songs if you'd like to get the full experience)
Anyways, enjoy this chapter ;)

We were on our way home, and it was already dark. I hate driving in the dark, even though there was a weird mood in the air after Alex Cole and Jackie witnessed Isaac's and my argument. Let's not call it an argument; I feel like a heated discussion is what we'll tell Katherine. No, I'm not planning to snitch, but I just know she's going to hear about this fight from the other boys. It's bound to happen.

The laughter inside the car, caused by Danny and Jordan, reminded me of the mood inside the car I sat in months ago. It was dark then too, and there was the same laughter. It was the same night I was lying in a hospital bed, fully awake, knowing my parents were gone, and my sister was fighting for her life in the same building. It was the night I realized that the halls of hospitals have heard more prayers than the walls of churches. They heard mine too, but it seems like they weren't answered. I was ashamed. How could it take me so long to recognize the love I had received all my life? I guess it's true that love is felt most when it's leaving.

I decided to drown out the painful reminder of my past with some music. I was about to pull my headphones out of my bag when I noticed Isaac observing every inch of me. I felt dumb. How could I tell him that 'Jealousy is only for people who lack confidence' when I'm sitting here an hour later, wondering whether he's looking at me or my cakey makeup and crusty lips? Well, actually, I never said I was confident; I said jealousy is for people who lack confidence.
I absolutely lack confidence.

Heck yeah, I'm insecure about my whole appearance, and I was close to turning green due to feeling jealous.

I'm so going to cry tonight, and I will never ever speak to him... until tomorrow because we're still on sheep duty. Well, it doesn't matter now; I'll think about that tomorrow..

★

The evening was quiet, at least for me, as I shut myself off from everyone. I played the guitar in my room, repeatedly performing the same song, "Fade Into You." If I could listen to only one song for the remaining time I have on this planet, I would choose this song without hesitation. It's a sad but comforting tune that evokes happiness. The song is flexible; it can be whatever you'd like. However, I was distracted, playing it on repeat due to my sudden awareness of the impending day—Lucy's birthday tomorrow.

I felt guilt. If we hadn't switched seats because my feet hurt from Dad taking up so much space, I would have been the one on the side the truck hit the car the hardest. I would have been the one buried six feet under. Lucy would know how to help Jackie through the loss of our parents. I don't even know how to help myself.

Lost in thought, I didn't notice Katherine entering the dark room, now called my home. She switched on the lights. "Hey, sweetie. I haven't seen you since this morning. Are you okay?"

My fingers abruptly stopped their robotic movement as my brain searched for words. "I'm fine." I let out a deep sigh. "Actually, I'm not. I feel like...
I guess I'm sick."

She passed me a motherly smile. "Do you need anything?"

I finally looked her in the eyes. "A hug?"

Katherine didn't need to hear it twice to understand what was going on. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Breaking the hug and making eye contact, I replied, "I don't think I'm ready. But thanks, not just for the hug, for everything."

She patted my shoulder. "I'm always there if you need anything, and I'm glad I could help."