Even the light holds the dark

No feeling

The words fled out of Mikey's mouth. Donnie stood their in complete horror, not knowing what to do. The purple masked turtles hand flew to his chest.
"No more, no more please, stop..." Donnie pleaded and he curled on the ground."i-I can't take this anymore, please stop." Leo ran to Donnie's side, comforting him and getting him back on his feet. Mikey was still whimpering about wanting to be dead.the black was gone from his eyes, he was himself again, for now. Mikey used whatever energy he had left in him to crawl over to Donnie and Leo.
"Go away." Leo spoke sternly, trying to calm down the still crying Donnie. Mikey's looked at leo, the innocent blue orbs welling with tears.
"You've done enough, go away." leo said again, but with more power in his voice, Leo was conflicted about his feelings for mikey, even though he was his brother, he hurt the ones closest to him, and it's hard to forgive that. Mikey didn't move, he laid his head on the cold floor and shut his eyes.
Donnie was having a panic attack from all that happened, the stress just built up until he cracked. Sobs and screams could be heard from donnie all over the lair, but Mikey still laid on the floor, pressing his check against the smooth surface trying to block out everything.
Deep down leo knew this wasn't Mikey's fault, but he needed someone to blame, something he could tell they did wrong so he didn't blame himself. He should have kown Mikey was going off the deep end, he should have realized his cheery little brother was hurting, but yet he didn't notice, no one did, and now Raph was dead.
No one realized Mikey was hurting as much a he did and still was, he blamed him self for all this. He thought he was the worst thing to ever happen to this world, and that weight on someone chips away at their mental health. He just laid on the floor, contemplating what would happen if he died that very moment, would it really make things better? Or would it plunge his family deeper into depression, but he already did enough pain, why would this hurt anymore? Aren't they numb from the pain yet? He was, and has been. Being able to withstand so much hurt is not a gift, it's pure torture, so you try to make yourself feel again buy hurting yourself, it may seem strange, but it is the worst. Mikey had no feeling anymore, he was just a hollow husk of emotion, he was alive and breathing, but he just didn't respond like a normal being. All the feelings he used to hold on to where completely gone, and it was because of the voice.