Fever dream • JJ Maybank

𝐓𝐨𝐨 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐞

"I gotta go" I says after I notices the missed calls and massages Rafe left me "why?" JJ asks "I just need to go, but I don't forget that you guys own me an explanation about all of this" I says tying up my shoes

"Okay, we'll text you later" John B says "are you okay?" JJ asks "yeah I just need to take care of something" I says "bye" I adds and they all says it back before I walked out of the door

I was on my way to the Cameron house, Rafe only texted me that we have to talk, he didn't say about what though

I knock on the door seeing Wheezie opening it "oh hey Haley, Rafe has been looking for you" she says "is he here?" I asks "yeah he's in his room"

"Thank you Wheezie" I says walking upstairs to his room. I open the room seeing him sniffing coke "Haley" he says "what the fuck Rafe I thought you've got sober" I says

"Where the fuck have you been?" Rafe asks "I was with Sarah" I lies "don't you dare fucking lie to me Haley!" he says raising his voice

"Where have you been? Huh?" He asks again "I am telling you I was with Sarah" I lies again and he chuckles. to be honest, at this moment I started to get scared from him, his eyes were red from the drugs and I was scared of the effect the drugs has on him

"Topper told me he saw you with John B and JJ" he says making me freeze "oh what is that? Are you sacred now?" He says noticing I got anxious, stepping closer to me

"do I seem stupid to you Haley?" He asks stepping closer to me again "No"I simply answers "Do I seem stupid!" He shouted at me, few inches away from my face

"Rafe you are scaring me" I says bitting my lips out of tress "why are you lying to me? Why are you hanging out with those pogues" he asks and I stays quite

"You answer me when I talking to you!" He shouts as he shoves harshly me and I fell on his bed "why are you lying to me?" He yells again as he slaps me aggressively. I put my hand on my cheek as I stand up looking at him with horror. We had fights, but never like this one.

"Shit Haley, I didn't mean to-" he says trying to reach for me but I pushes him "don't" I says, completely scared from him right now.

"I am sorry, I just hate seeing you with them" he says and I see tears falling down on his cheek "please forgive me, I am sorry" he says as he pulls me into a hug, I don't push him this time, but I don't hug him back

I know this becomes toxic but I just felt bad for him, I wanted to help him go through the shut he go through and I don't want to make it worse by leaving him "I promise I will be better, it would never happen again I promise" he says

"Okay" is all I say "I love you Haley" he adds "I love you too" I says, not knowing if those words still has meaning.

"But Haley, if I would try to get better you'd have to make an effort for this relationship too" he says "what do you mean?" I asks looking at him, how can he seriously asked me that after what just happened.

"don't tell me this is about the pogues again" I says "I just loves you so much you have to understand me" he says, calm this time "okay, I'd stop seeing them" I says "thank you" he says with a smile as he kissed me

"I gotta go take of business now but I'll meet you tomorrow okay?" He says and I nod as I watches him leaves the room

I hate that he makes me feel bad for him even after what he did, the thought that even after what happened I am able to forgive him scared me.