1 out of 150//Spencer Reid

45. Mixed feelings

Y/N
"Y/N! Before you go, what was your grade from Spencer's exam?" Penelope asked as you stopped.

You and the team had just gotten back from the case in Los Angeles. You were very tired, and you just wanted to get into bed and sleep.

"Oh! I haven't checked!" You reminded yourself. You quickly grabbed your phone and saw the email notification on your screen. You clicked on it and within moments, you were being shown your grade.

"I got 100!" You cheered, watching as Spencer and Emily walked down to the bullpen.

"Damn! Nice work, Y/N! Wait, was Spencer biased?" Derek chuckled, eyeing Spencer, who shook his head.

"I gave her a 100, sure, but Emily graded Y/N's exam as well. We both graded her exam, trying to be as unbiased as possible." Spencer reassured Derek, who smiled.

"All my studying paid off!" You chuckled, wrapping your arms around your boyfriend's neck. He happily hugged you back, placing a kiss on your cheek.

"Alright, alright. Everyone head home before another case pops up." Hotch smiled, letting you and everyone else go.

"Goodnight, Y/N. Goodnight, Spencer." JJ smiled. She smiled at both of you, but her smile seemed to linger longer for you than it did for Spencer. There was clearly some mixed feelings between her and Spencer. You were confused, until you and Spencer exited the elevator, heading toward the entrance to the building. That's when Spencer mentioned what JJ had admitted while they were held hostage. Hearing that your friend admitted to having always loved your boyfriend, you didn't know what to say or how to react.

From the moment Spencer told you what JJ admitted, the trip home was silent. On one hand, you were trying to find the appropriate response or action to what Spencer had said, but on the other hand, you wanted to forget what Spencer had said, at least for the night. The moment Spencer locked the door to the apartment, you dropped your bag and got changed, immediately rushing over to the bed inside the bedroom. You snuggled into the blankets, trying to silence your very awake brain.

"Goodnight, my love." Spencer kissed your forehead, letting you sleep.

You stood in front of the floor-length mirror in your closet. Spencer was at work already, having been called in for a meeting with Hotch and JJ. You lifted your pyjama shirt and pulled it fully off your torso. You examined your naked upper torso. You eyed the bullet wound in your shoulder. You touched it briefly before looking at the three stab wounds that were in your side. You felt weird, now that you had 4 wounds. You wondered if Spencer found you more disgusting now that you had wounds that would never go away.

Within an hour, you had gotten changed. You put on a minimal amount of makeup and you looked presentable. You headed to work with your purse and go bag.

As you stepped foot into the bullpen, you noticed that the only team members in the bullpen were Emily and Derek.

"Morning, Y/N." Derek smiled as Emily handed you a coffee that you happily accepted.

After an hour or so, you neatened up the pile of case files, intending to go and give them to Hotch. You stood up from your desk, the pile of case files in your arms.

"Morning Y/N. Can we talk?" Spencer smiled, walking up to you. JJ closely followed him.

"Oh, yeah. What's up?" You asked, smiling.

"Uh, well, there's not easy way to say this. But the truth, uh- the truth is that...when JJ told me that she still loved me- uh, it made me realise that I- I love her too. Her admission unlocked my feelings that I had repressed. I think that, uh, I might have started dating you, believing that JJ would never love me, but things have changed and I- I want to try with JJ. I want to try a relationship with her." Spencer explained.