REMINISCENT

CHAPTER TWENTY ONE: The Start Of A Whole New Me (EDITED)

Ashley's POV
I was gasping for air, blinking back tears. I told myself i would never cry over this again, but why can't I stop this tightness in my chest

I knew Jake would run after me and honestly i hope he really does because i need somone.

He burst through the bathroom door and engulfed me in a hug. "shhhh" he whispered soothingly

When i was calm he dragged me out the school doors, towards the tree at the side of the main building and to where we all hangout from as group.

He sat me down next to him and wrapped his arm around my shoulder "Talk to me"

"It's like he even knows what he's saying, like he has a clue." I thought of his words

"Well you could talk to him. He's confused, frustrated even annoyed. You have answers." Jake explained

"But you know i can't do that Jake. I wish i could but i can't"

"Why?" He grunted with frustration "You can't keep doing this to him or yourself. He's losing sleep over this, his attacks keep getting worse, please i can't keep seeing him do this to himself, i can't keep seeing him change who he is over this, I begging you Ashley, please don't do this to my brother?please?" he desperately begged which irritated me

"What about me huh?! what about all the pain i've been through after that accident? what about the girl i used to be?what about all my sleepless nights?" my emotions got the best of me at this point and i didn't care who listened to my outburst "It's been years yet no one has done anything to help him remember. Everybody's just acting like nothing happened and expect me to act the same when i've lost somebody who means the world to me" i sniffed

"I was in a freaking accident Jake, an accident that left my head fucked up, honestly i still am. Do you know how heart breaking it is to wait for someone to wake up from a coma only for them to wake up and not know who you are? so yeah i know he's going through a lot, but he hasn't felt half the shit i have, so this once, let me be selfish." I could see his heart breaking through his eyes, he was sad and angry too

"Yet you say you love him? is this somethig you do to someone you love?" he hit where it hurt " or is this because you're letting go?"

I shook my head "I'm not letting go....I've let go" with that, i stood to leave

....

At lunch, both Jake and Aiden were in sour moods. They both sat silently eating their food as everyone else engaged in small talk.

"Y'all good?" Christy finally addressed the elephant in the room

"Yes" Jake lied through his teeth

"No" Aiden replied bluntly

"Aww why? is it because you did't find the girl you were looking for since the beach party a while ago?" Emma frowned

"Oh i found her alright" he glared into my eyes "but she doesn't want to talk to me" he looked away angrely

My blood began to boil, he thinks i have a choice?!

"oh, that's so sad, but why doesn't she wanna talk to you?" Emma pouted

" I don't know. But, it's fine i don't care" he shrugged "it was a mistake anyway, at least I can move on from it"

Jake choked on his food and i stood to walk away. i don't need to listen to his pitiful stories

"Ashley wait!" Jake ran after me

"Why so that you can pity me? Well i don't need your pity so you can just go back" i stomped towards the school doors