MY LIFE IN A KENYAN UNI

TABLES TURN

Graham's birthday...or to sound more epic ,Graham's bash.Bashes have to be lit ofcourse,with all the fun that entails a bash.A kenyan bash is just not a cake and friends.A kenyan bash has to fulfill some certain qualities to be regarded as a bash.One,drinks.Two,madem.<Girls>Three,Food.
Let's emphasize on the first one guys.It just must be there whether you like it or not.The second one,bana that is a must.

And our birthday boy Graham had all that.Successfully fulfilling the board of bashes with all the three required qualities.
Haya.

Yours truly obviously didn't attend the bash but came back to hot mushene.<Hot gossip>I must say I'm lucky not to have gone because I would have already messed my rapport with others in my class because of the same bash.

"Kunywa tu kwanza kahawa because this mushene needs you awake ." <Drink coffee first because the gossip needs you awake>Cathy handed me a cup of coffee she prepared that night.This was not your regular coffee.Comrade with a coffee maker?Boil your water in your kettle pour it in your cup,add coffee and sugar and walah!Coffee..ish.

"The bash was lit but !But heeh"Shouted Cathy. I was pretty curious to know what she did or what someone did ,isikuwe amechoma.<Hope she didn't embarass herself>

"Nilichoma mbaya."
<I embarrassed myself so bad.>
Well I expected that.

"Who did you kill?"I asked jokingly.

So our poor Cathy really let loose so much till she was so drunk."I drank so much to the point where I started shouting the whole hallway until Alex shushed me.Pretty embarrassing I know everyone knows me in this hostel now."
Wait Alex!?What was that about man!

I started panicking because there's no way Alex can become a bestie bestie when I'm clearly the love of his life!

"Actually ye ndio alikuja na drinks."<He came with the drinks.>
Waitttttt.what!Okay I really don't like where this is going.
"Ai be serious Cathy."

"Eeh he brought drinks and wine then he sat with Cathy on the top bed.Eish Cathy and Alex were inseperable during the night.I could just see you whisper and laugh with each other.Mapenziii!"Nekesa said this ,sounding a bit sarcastic ,as poor Shee was struggling with jealousy. Nakwambia nilikuwa naskia kawaru hapa kwa throat.

What in the world was that.whispering? Laughing? You have got to be kidding me.

"Oh,si mlijienjoy."<Then you had fun!"Not me being jealous and topping it with sarcasm.

"So much fun and guess what guys? We actually..."
Please don't say he hit .please don't please don't pleaseee.

"Kissed."
Ohhhh fuck my life.Now you're getting out of hand little brat!
"Oh someone's ringing me, I'll be back."I saw it wise to exit before my anger could turn to violence.I remember in highschool I poured a hot cup of black tea to my fellow prefect because she ate my share of bread for breakfast.Oops.So there's no way I would accept for some girl to get with my man.Okay he's not MY man technically but you know he IS my man.Sort of.

"Ngoja ndio story inaanza.<Wait it's just the beginning of the story.>We got so drunk people at the  bash were just wild.Hadi Ricky insisted he wanted to talk to you so bad"

Yes I did speak to Ricky and he sounded drunk af.The man started to confess his feelings .By the way who told guys getting drunk is an excuse to confess your feelings?Ask them afterwards ,they'd blame it on the alcohol.Come on guys you can always do better than that.

"Imagine Alex got so angry when Ricky call.."
"Uko na mdomo refu kama hizo stickons zako ugly crooked." Well Cathy interrupted Nekesa for a reason.Not sure the stopper was necessary but..Nekesa's stickons were really not straight guys.I just didn't want to be the one to tell her because girls and their beauty, you should never criticise that or its death for you.

"You're just jealous because Alex doesn't like you but Shee."
Oooooooops! Way to go Nekesa I knew you were a smart girl!Now this is gonna hurt Cathy.
"Wait wait wait I'm not even interested in Alex,why would you even think that girl.Acha kupandisha Cathy pressureee."I spoke patting Cathy's back and she knew I was mocking her.

"Anyway, I don't want to see Alex or talk to him ever in my life." Cathy shocked me
What was this about? That just didn't come out of Cathy's mouth.
"I opened up alot to him when I was drunk he already knows too much.So I told him to never talk to me ever again."

Ha!Thanks for giving him up for me bih!
"Cathy you can't be serious.You love Alex don't give up girl."WELCOME my toxicity!
"Nope made my mind."
"Nilijua tu mtawachana."<I knew you'd break up.> Nekesa has to be my favourite I swear.This girl can say anything without worry.Dont lie,we all have a Nekesa in our lives right?

"Nor Ricky's face or any other person that was in that bash.I hate them all ofcourse except Nekesa and her long mouth."

Well the tables did turn for you Cathy pretty badly.Just because of  opening up to people during a bash? Doesn't look legit to me but anyway as long as Alex is left to me bih I'm okay.Also guys acheni pombe nyingi... SAY NO TO BEER..Well,A LOT OF BEER.

Class rep:Hello guys lesson tomorrow at 7 am Anat lab.

You've got to be kidding me.7 am .7 AM! Mimi niattend lesson ya 7 na hiyo baridi nipate pneumonia nifurahishe lecturer!<I attending a 7am class to please the lecturer and get pneumonia!>

Also me in the morning being the first person to arrive because I don't have a choice ama nitamiss exams without an 80%attendance.
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