Let's hope for the best

Chapter 47: Letting go

At times we couldn't shake it
my sweet joy
Always remember me
...

And it's late now, I put down my laptop: I'm done writing for today.

I pick up a pyjama from my new walk-in closet, I tie my hair into a ponytail, and I go to bed.

The ghosts are asleep, and the house is quiet, all over:

My paintings are hanging on the wall; and pictures of my little achievements, so far.

When I finished my internship.

My new little office.

A daytrip with my girlfriends to the seaside.

Me, in running gear.

Christmas with my siblings.

And I close my eyes, and eventually, I fall asleep.

...

And I hear a music, I don't know where it comes from.

I'm in a familiar place, but I cannot remember exactly where it is.

I walk on, and there are so many people: they're all looking at me.

as if they have been waiting for me.

There's my mom, in her old, favourite jumper.

With her engagement ring, that had been stolen... but somehow, it's on her finger now.

And my aunt, in her blue wig.

And my grand-mother, in her perfect curls.

And Simon, and Eva, and all of my children from the oncology ward...

They look peaceful now.

And my high-school friends.

And Jasmine, in a beautiful deep, emerald green dress, holding Sophie.

She's smiling at me.

And Alex.

And George, and Olivia, and Max.

And my internship colleagues, and I walk past them all.

Daniel and Emma.

And there are my siblings- my three, beautiful kids: now, two amazing adults, and a fantastic teen-ager.

And my dad, and his wife, they're here as well.

He's smiling, too: maybe he is, finally, happy for me.

And then, I recognize the place: it is the Ferris wheel.

Where we went on holiday, many years ago.

And I look down, and I also realize that I'm wearing a long, white chiffon dress.

With little pearls and beads embroidered on it- I don't know how it's done, but the dress is like, shining. I've never seen anything like it.

And my hair is gathered up on my nape, in a loose updo.

And I have little white flowers through my hair, as I've always pictured I would have.

And everyone just stands there, smiling, as I walk past them.

And at the bottom of the Ferris wheel, there's him, waiting for me.

Wearing his first shirt, the one that I had gifted him. And a manga T-shirt, underneath.

He holds out his hand, and I take it.

And "hi, Theo... I have been looking for you. I wanted to say goodbye".

"Shhh... shut up now, Bi. Give me your hand. Step up. I told I would have brought you back here. Didn't I?"

"You did, Theo. And I told you that I would have loved you forever, Didn't I?"

"You did, Bi."

"And I will... I will, Theo. As I promised. I will not forget you. Do you know that?"

"I know, Bi. I've always known..."

"You'll be in my heart forever.... I promise. But you must let me go now, Theo. I need to go. I need to go back... I can't stay here with you"

"I know. I just wanted to say goodbye, my Bi. Until we meet again..."

"Goodbye then, Theo... my friend. My lover. My husband. Until we meet again. I will never forget you...."