Save Me - Joel Hokka | Blind Channel

Chapter 12: So, you're Joel's new one?

"Niko?", Joel said as he answered the call. "Ugh, always you and your stupid ideas. Yes, you're right, the fact that I answered the call means that I'm not fucking right now but nevertheless, you can't come over and continue your party at mine", he continued. Oh, so that's what Niko had planned. Apparently partying wasn't as fun without Joel so they wanted to have fun at Joel's with him. "Niko, I'm not at home right now and until I'm there, it'll take some time. For you too, by the way. I mean, you know that I don't live that close to the bar. How do you even want to get drunk Porko there?" "Niko, that won't work. You should really stay at the bar and party there." Again, Joel listened to Niko while rolling his eyes. "No, Niko, I won't come back. I don't need fans around me right now, I want to finally have some private space. You know how much I appreciate our fans but it's just too much right now."

Before I could think about the idea that came to my mind when I saw the despair in Joel's eyes, I had already expressed it. "They can come here. I mean, my apartment isn't big but-" "Are you sure? Marlene, you don't have to do that" No, I wasn't. Of course I wasn't. And if I had been sober, I for sure would have said. I wouldn't have suggested this. But now I had done that and I didn't want to withdraw my offer. "Yes", I therefore mumbled. "Listen, Niko", Joel now seemed to interrupt his friend. "I'll send you an address you can come to. It's only a few minutes of walking from the bar and the girls would even have some female company. The apartment isn't that big but we'd have fun and I'd join you. I'm already here so I can prepare some stuff if necessary." Joel softly smiled at me before saying bye to Niko and texting someone - probably sending Niko my address. "Thank you, Marlene. I really appreciate that."

I only nodded before I opened the door to my apartment and went upstairs with Joel following me. "I only have some beer and maybe also a bottle of wine at home. I hope that's enough for you." "Should be. We already drank some booze so everything should be fine, we don't need harder liquor. And if the boys want some, they gotta buy it." "Marlene, I'm sorry. I didn't plan to make myself part of your life and make you spend more time with me than you want to. But when I saw you in the bar today... I just... You didn't look good. And you still don't. I guess that's also because of me. Sorry. I promise, I'll leave you after this. If you feel better, I can even make sure that the boys and I will even go to another bar in the future. I mean, after discovering this one a while ago, it immediately became our favorite one but if it makes you feel uncomfortable, I'd talk to the boys."

I nodded before I whispered a quiet "Thank you". I felt bad taking the offer since I didn't want the band to have less or whatever because of me but I knew that it would make me feel better and it would help me to forget Joel. And I had learned from the past that I had to take care of myself even if it wasn't the best for other people. But I didn't like that Joel apologized for pushing himself into my life because right now, I was the one pushing myself into their life although I didn't want it and the other boys probably wouldn't like it once they got to know me either. But it was too late. They were probably already on their way here and Joel would be disappointed if I now told them to leave. Additionally, he had asked if I was sure and I said yes; I couldn't change my opinion now, right?

I quickly did my beddings and put some beer into the fridge to make sure it would be cool when the guys arrived while Joel stood in my apartment, apparently not knowing what to do or say. Luckily, the awkward silence didn't last for too long because the doorbell rang and after Joel had opened the doors, a bunch of people were entering my room. Oh help, I thought it was only the six boys... I thought as I saw two women following the band members into my apartment. So that's why Joel said that the girls would have some female company. Could have guessed that the boys are not alone.

"Oh Joel, you're at a chick's? Was the sex so bad that you answered my call as a rescue?", a man with long brown curls - I assumed it was Niko because he was talking about his call- joked when he saw me standing next to Joel. "No, Niko, imagine, I can also spend time with a woman without fucking", Joel hissed back. "Oh wow. What did you do then? Let me guess: You were making out and just haven't fucked yet." I quietly sighed. I really didn't want to talk about what was or had been going on between Joel and me now. But luckily, people seemed to understand that I couldn't laugh about Niko's jokes and tried to stop him. "Niko, stop assuming stuff about my private life. Especially when the person you're talking about is in the same room and seems to feel uncomfortable because of that", Joel told him and one of the women placed her hand on Niko's shoulder, signalizing him to stop.