The Obsession | Jimin

[ 07 ]

Sometimes, you say things that you don't really mean due to extreme emotions in the heat of the moment whether it's due to anger, sadness or happiness. For you, that's what happened a week ago.

But it was something much deeper than that.

The vile words that Ara was spitting didn't only anger you but it also made you feel worthless as a person. Like you were below everyone.

When she said those disgusting words at the party behind your back, you automatically recognised her personality and her character.

However, when she tainted you with her words in front of you at the hospital - it made you fume in rage.

Her unreasonable words that you can't be with them or be part of their circle was just so confusing and stupid to say the least.

When did you ever try to talk to them or be friends with them? Yes, you were crushing on Jimin but nobody knew about that and you never made it apparent or took any action to be close with him.

Just because you attended one of their parties where they didn't personally invite you, didn't make you any less of a person than they are.

In a spilt of a second, you let out words that were even more confusing than hers. Boyfriend.

"Jimin is my boyfriend."

For a few seconds, you felt satisfied and happy to see their reaction. Not only were they frozen but they also couldn't reply back to you however after a while, it clicked in your head that you said words that could never become real in your life.

Even if it was for a few seconds, you felt joy that you were considered as Jimin's girlfriend and this was your unhealthy obsession talking to your mind.

But the next second, the bitter reality came to your face and this was your rational side talking to your mind. You took advantage of his condition to spit this lie.

You could have never been able to say this confidently if it wasn't for his condition. You felt very pathetic. That happiness and joy only lasted for a few seconds but after that, you only felt resentment towards yourself.

Even if Jimin lost his recent memories, there's no way he would have dated someone like you before, after or now. That lie was meaningless. Yes, it did make their mouths shut at that moment but they obviously knew you could never be his girlfriend, let alone date him.

'Thank you.. for your help.' the first words he spoke to you, those words kept replaying in your mind.

At that moment, he didn't seem like his friends who were arrogant or full of themselves. His eyes showed appreciation & his voice was laced with kindness and that made you feel badder about yourself.

You just hoped that your words weren't taken seriously. The entire week, you didn't face any issues and hoped it would stay that way. They would probably think that a crazy girl made a stupid joke, right?

•••

Misoo & I finished the last class of the day and were packing our bags.

"Hey, are you okay y/n? You seem down since last week." Misoo asked in a worried tone while we were both leaving the classroom.

"Nothing, just tired." I replied back to her.

How could I say that I was scared that Jimin's friends, mainly Ara could make fun of me or embarrass me in front of everyone for saying such a stupid lie or the fact that I felt disgusted about myself for not recognising the person who I was turning to?

But the past few days, another thought started to roam through my mind and it was Jimin. What if Jimin was the one who embarrassed me in front of everyone? He would probably be the one who would be the most offended by my words.

I couldn't imagine it. I could never because I knew it would destroy me. I wasn't as strong to face that harsh reality.

"I can understand that you are still affected by that accident in the train station. Try to forget it, I know it's easier said than done but try to divert your mind.." that incident at that train station made headlines nationwide.

It's not everyday that a group of gangsters fought in broad daylight which led to other people getting hurt in the process.

Misoo didn't know that I helped Jimin that day nor the fact that he had retrograde amnesia. The latter was something that wasn't my place to share but the former was another thing to add onto my list of things I didn't share with the person who was the closest to me.

I was kind of grateful that Misoo thought the reason I was down was because of that incident. It helped hide the truth but once again, if that incident didn't happen - I wouldn't be this terrified and nervous in the first place. Who am I kidding? The reason why I'm in this place is because of my stupid feelings.

While the both of us were walking out of the building, a crowd of girls was surrounding the entrance.

I could only hear them giggling and laughing with each other. Both Misoo & exchanged a look to each other that screamed confusion and just tried to get away from there.

That's when I heard a voice call me out.

"Y/n!" it was a voice that I recognised instantly.