Zodiac Signs Living Together

At Therapy

ARIES:

Aries: It's just, I feel like one of these days, I should kill some bitches

Therapist: Don't do that! What even are you saying?

Aries: One of these days I'm gonna SNAP! And next thing you know, it's snap crackle pop!

TAURUS:

Taurus: Can I leave now?

Therapist: We still need to discuss this problem with your sleep! Insomnia is a serious issue!

Taurus: I'll survive

Therapist: Clearly, you won't

GEMINI:

Gemini: And that Libra told me that I was the drama! Can you believe that?

Therapist: You spread false rumors about your best friend, proceeded to make their life a living hell, and outed them to your entire school cafeteria. I think your friend should be here, not you.

Gemini: This is boring. Bye.

Therapist:... I'm not paid enough

CANCER:

Cancer: *on the verge of tears* And just- I can't even explain how I feel right now! It's just.

Therapist: Sir, You need to breathe.

Cancer: SHUT THE FUCK UP! I'M BROKEN, YOU HEAR ME? BROKEN!

Therapist: Woah! Sir! It was just a missing chicken nugget! Just file a complaint!

Cancer: My life is over! This is horrible!

Okay, I'm done. How was my acting?

Therapist: Huh?

Cancer: This wasn't the audition for season 5 of Stranger things...?

Therapist: WHAT? NO!!

Cancer: oooh. Oops :) 

LEO:

Leo: Look, I'm not saying that I should've drop-kicked the 3-year-old...But like, it was worth it.

Therapist: You're going to jail.

Leo: Okay, but like make sure they use an HD camera for my mugshot-

VIRGO:

Virgo: You should tidy this place up. The germs are barking in this place!

Therapist: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DOES THE CRITICISM STOP IT HAS BEEN 3 HOURS-

LIBRA:

Libra: I can't decide if it's shut depression or...ADHD?

Therapist: You don't have a mental illness, Libra

Libra: Well, I can't decide on a personality. Like last Tuesday I had OCD

therapist: Huh?

Lubra: It was temporary. Don't worry!

Therapist: So...you have OCD?

Libra: NO! Only on Tuesdays! Besides 3 Tuesdays ago, that was my break day!

Therapist...my head hurts

SCORPIO:

Scorpio: What do you mean that attempted murder is illegal? I didn't do it, did I?

Therapist: PLEASE SIR! I DON't FEEL SAFE!

Scorpio: But I'm not trying to kill you! my backyard has too many bodies already

Therapist: WHAT!?

Scorpio....you've heard too much!

SAGITTARIUS:

Sag: My ex thinks I was insane. But you think I'm normal, right

Therapist:...

Sag: Are you mute or something?

Therapist:...

Sag: Oh, I forgot I knocked you out because I came here while drunk. Not the best idea, huh?

CAPRICORN:

Capricorn: But I will never admit that I am the problem. It's clearly everybody else.

Therapist: Well, selling orphans for money is kinda...messed up

Capricorn: Money is money you'd do it too

Therapist...ok

AQUARIUS:

Aqua: But after analyzing Isaac newtons law of transitivity-

Therapist: You've been saying false scientific facts for 2 hours now.

Aqua: These are real! I did my research!

on BuzzFeed

PISCES:

Pisces: And then this giant flamingo came and ate Scorpio like a bug! It was so funny!

Therapist: Are you sure you weren't....high?

Pisces: I'm always high, so I can't tell! Haha!