dandelions ➥ joseph quinn

31

mari was curled up on the couch in her trailer, distracting herself by reading. she could lie and say she felt bad about snapping at jenny, but she sure as fuck did not.

as the words on the page began to bleed into one, mari was startled by a light tapping on her trailer. wondering who would be dumb enough to walk through the sudden rain storm that was hitting the area, she got up and walked to the door.

"what are you doing here?" she sighed, noticing joe who stood there with an umbrella as he stared at her.

"can we talk?" joe said, loud enough for hear over the rain. mari moved out of the doorframe, allowing joe to enter her trailer.

"what?" mari asked once joe was settled into the trailer, a light shiver running through his body. mari handed up one of her many blankets in her trailer and they sat down on the couch together, curled up and facing one another.

"it's about earlier." mari nodded, chewing on her bottom lip as she waited for him to go on. "about what you said.."

"actually, you know what, joe." mari started, her tone catching him off guard. "i do not like jenny."

"oh." joe said, blinking a couple times as he took in what she said. he knew jenny wasn't the best girlfriend sometimes, but his best friend confessing her dislike for her made him feel off.

"i tried, joe, i really did. but she's just not a good girlfriend and seemingly a good person." mari said, running her hands through her hair. "i know she's your girlfriend, joe."

"yeah but you're my best friend, mars." mari's lip twitched slightly, but she forced the smile away.

"i tried to like her. but every time i hear about her ever since she said what she did to you about being sexy, i just started feeling more and more anger and dislike towards her. and i don't hate her because i like you or whatever."

joe's eyebrow was raised, a nervous smile on his face. "you like me?"

mari shook her head, causing joe to frown. "no, that's not what i'm saying."

"oh, so you don't like me?" he felt his heart drop, disappointment filling him. he hated himself for feeling like this, especially since he already had a girlfriend.

but joe couldn't lie and say he didn't lay awake thinking about mari, or the 'what ifs'. he's lay awake while jenny was asleep next to him, oblivious that his thoughts were running miles and miles on end.

he also couldn't lie and say he didn't try and be around mari at any given moment. she was a force of nature and he was drawn to her, in every aspect. he definitely couldn't lie and say he wasn't attracted to her, and when he found out she was his love interest in the show, his heart filled it joy.

mari groaned. "no, i'm not saying that either."

mari noticed the confused look on joe's face and she realized she should have used different wording. of course she liked him. but he couldn't know that, especially since he had a girlfriend she hated.

"what are you saying, mars?" joe whispered, afraid of the answer.

"i think we need to put some distance between us, as friends." mari finally said, giving joe a sympathetic smile.

"what? i don't want that." joe quickly said, shaking his head. he sat up as he felt his heart racing at the possibility of him not being close to mari.

"joe.."

"no, mari. i don't want distance between us. you are my best friend and i'll be damned if i lose that because of anyone else!"

mari looked down and smiled sadly. "even if that someone else is your girlfriend, joe?"

joe went to say something but the words fell short, his eyes shooting across the room as he tried to answer.

"your girlfriend has to be the most important person in your life, okay? and right now, i know she does not like me. but i will be damned if you lose out on happiness because of our friendship." mari said, taking joe's larger hands. she ran her thumb over the rings he wore, a small sigh leaving her lips. "i won't do that to you."

"mars, come on." she shook her head, taking a deep breath.

"maybe one day jenny and i will come to tolerate each other but right now, i feel like a wedge between you two and i know damn well if that was my relationship, i wouldn't be too happy." joe chewed the inside of his cheek, nerves circulating throughout his body.

"how is this going to work?"

"well.." mari started, squeezing his hands. "we'll only be around one another as coworkers, do our job. but no hanging out in between filming, no more late night drives. i won't call you in the middle of the night with my anxiety and you won't call me every morning to give me the weather report and a good morning."

joe laughed, shaking his head. "i still don't see why it's necessary."

"because, i refuse to give jenny a reason to hate me more than she does."

"i can talk to her about her feelings towards you."

mari shook her head quickly, clearing her throat. "god, no. don't do that. she needs to come first and if you talk to her about me, she will feel inferior and that's not fair. i know if i was your girlfriend, i'd want you to put me above everyone."

joe frowned. if i was your girlfriend. another "if". what if mari actually liked him and hid it? what if she hated jenny because she had feelings for him? what if every late night phone call and 2am drives with one another was her way of being drawn to him? what if he had a shot with her and his insecurities drew him to jenny?

"i don't want to lose you, mars."

"this is just some space. give you and jenny sometime to figure things out and reconnect as a couple without me in the way."

mari noticed the look on his face and she sighed, pulling him into a hug. joe buried his face info mari's neck, making her shiver as she felt his hot breath on a very sensitive part of her neck.

mari pulled away from the hug, planting a soft kiss on joe's cheek. the feeling of her lips on his skin sent his mind into overdrive and he suddenly realized why jenny disliked her. joe was infatuated with mari and everything she does.

"go back and be with jenny, joe." mari nudged him and he nodded, getting up and grabbing the umbrella before waving goodbye. with the slam of the door indicating his departure, mari face planted on the couch in front of her and let out a scream.

"fuck me!" mari angrily said, sighing. she knew she mostly did it for herself. she couldn't stand being around joe knowing she couldn't have him, and a distance was the only solution.