Famous Last Words! (Frerard fic, also a bit of Mikey/Ray)

Light In The Shadows

Mikey's POV

"You love me, Ray?"

My eyes were stinging from the pain in my side. My bones ached as my right rib had splintered with the impact of the bullet I did not see coming. I suppose I'm in hospital, the white walls mocking me as purity washes over my dark depressing vulture.

Ray froze on the chair, not sparing a glance at me, however, the nurse just smiled before slowly exiting the room. Raymond. I want to laugh, want to make his name a joke that we always made, but I couldn't. It hurts too much.

"Mikey," he whispered with such strain I felt like another bullet had hit me.

I heard him right, didn't I? He did say he loves me, right? This is too hurtful. Is he playing with my emotions? I felt my eyes water as my lip trembles slightly. I was shot, and I have no idea what I have done. Was I a bad brother? Was I a bad friend? A bad enemy? Who shot me? Then it all came rushing back at once, it was Frank's stepdad. Why would he shoot me? And why was there an ambulance, with Frank in it, bruises covered his not-so-visible ink filled skin.

My eyes just let go, my limbs just went limp, and I fell back onto my bed, not sitting up. I turned onto my front, crying harshly into my pillow.

Ray got up from the chair immediately, placing a hand under my belly and turning me around to face him. He sat on the egde of the bed, opening his arms. I wrapped my arm around him and cried into his shoulder.

"Yes, oh my fucking God, yes," he whispered, and I think he's crying himself.

I gulped and a shover went down my spine. Ray just said he loved me. Fucking Ray Toro said he loved me. I had no idea what to think. I loved him too, as I told Gerard. I fell completely limp, my body just relaxed under all the pressure.

"I-I love you too," I mumble, tears filling my cheeks.

Ray held me tighter as he stroked my hair.

"It's alright, Mikes. Everything is gunna be alright."

I knew it was a lie. I might not be alright. But right now, Ray is holding me, Ray is completely fine, he isn't injured or dying. He's fine, and I'm forver greatful for it.

But where's Frank? Is he in hospital too? Is he hurt? Oh my God, new tears appeared as I suddenly went tense.

"Where's Gerard?" my voice cracked ice.

"Oh Mikey, I don't.....he's....oh my God. I can't believe I have to tell you this... he....Gee...he shot himself," these are the last words I'd want to hear.

I threw Ray back onto his chair with such force and I sat upright, rage coming over me.

"WHAT?" I bellow at the top of my voice.

"I know! Rick, he was raping and beating Frank like there was no tomorrow, and Gerard found Frank in the bath tub, nearly dead. He needed Frank in hospital so he called the police and the ambulance. Frank got put into the ambulance as Rick appeared again, and he shot you Mikes. I have no idea if he was aiming for you, or aiming for Gerard, or just shooting out of guilt and rage. But the bullet hit you none the less. Then Gerard was by your side in a flash. Rick's in prison, but Frank and Gerard are in this hospital, being checked over. Gerard was shocked after everything and wouldn't move, I yelled at him to do something, and he shot himself in the fucking head!" Ray told me everything, and I screamed once again.

"Mikey....I went to see Frank, and he looks a lot better. There is only one more operation to be done on him.....but it may kill him, that one operation may take Frank away from us and I was crying. Gerard hasn't even woken up yet, Michael! What if he never wakes up? What if Gerard dies? What if he's already dead? And what about you? You look awful! What if I loose you? I can't loose you now, not now, not after everything. I can't loose any of you!" Ray was the crying mess now.

More tears escaped my eyes before I crawled back over to Ray, although my body was yelling at me to stop moving. It hurts too much, but Ray needs me.

Ray takes me in his arms as I lean against him, taking his presence as a gold mine. Frank could die any minute and Gerard hasn't even woken up, and my side looks like a part of the fucking Corpse Bride movie, fucking great. Gerard. Suicide. What? I cry into his chest, and he cries into my shoulder. We don't mind, we just need time to think things over, cry when needed.

I never thought Gerard would be that type of person. He nearly got shot once, he was in a store, getting a cola drink and as he left, a gun was at his head, a gang member by his side. I don't remember what happened, but I'm so glad he's still here. But he might not be here for long. When did life get so cruel?

"What are we going to do?" I ask quietly, scared shitless.

"Well, Frank's operation is tomorrow, and I tried to talk him out of it, crying as I did so, he's still going through with it, talking like a frigging hippie saying he's free. If he lives, then he's going to be fine. Then we'll move onto Gerard, see if he's ever going to wake up," Ray said.

"What if he doesn't live?" I had to ask. It hurt me so much to ask them words about the youngest and bubbliest of us all, but we have to be prepared.

"Then I have no idea," Ray sighed.

"Great," I sigh, mumbling into his clothes.

"You need sleep though, Mikes, I'll visit you tomorrow," Ray tells me, and I nod as he lays me back down and covers me with the quilt.

"What about school?" I point out, and start to freak, "I'll be missing school....My perfect record......Exams...What if I miss a very important exam and can't get into a college?"

Ray snorts but he's not that amused.

"What if you don't live to even think about college? Think of reality Mikes, as well as the present. Just go to sleep, please," Ray begs, and he kisses my forehead before leaving.

My bones relax and sleep drifts over me. I feel sick as my side starts to bleed some more. I breathe heavily, my organs starting to fail. I take a breath before falling unconscious after I hear a very sharp.

"We need help!"

A nurse.

Oh well. Night.