Shoot

Chapter One: I know.

I'm in my best friends room, the lights dim and the closet open. She's getting ready for the party tonight and I'm laying on her bed wearing jean shorts and a lacy tank top. It's one of the last parties of the summer since school starts back up in three weeks. Senior year, baby. Let's get this over with so I can get out of here.

"What about this?" Meg asks, walking out of the closet wearing black shorts and a light green t-shirt.

"Beautiful, now let's go." I say, and she rolls her eyes.

"You're just saying that because you want to go. Be honest, Kate." Meg gives me a glare and I laugh.

"I'm not kidding, I really like it." I tell her, and she smiles.

"Okay, let's get out of here." Meg grabs her keys and I catch my phone buzzing on the bed out of the corner of my eye.

"Hello?"

"Hi, baby. You're sleeping at Megan's? You never called me to let me know the plan." My slightly over protective mother asks.

"Yeah, I'm sleeping here. We're going to some party, we shouldn't be out too late," I lie, scratching my thigh.

"Okay, be safe."

"I know."

I hang up the phone, and we walk out to Meg's shitty little car. Trust me, I'm not bashing the car, my looks very similar to hers, it's just a fact: they're shitty.

It's a good thing you're smart, my mother had always said. Because you'd never win anyone over with that attitude. I then proceeded to call her a bitch, thus proving her point exactly. I've always been smart without necessarily trying. I mean, I've always worked hard in the classroom, A's and B's, but it was my SAT score that landed me the spot at Columbia. I've always had a problem with doing my homework. I don't know how you make so many stupid mistakes in the real world, Kate. I swear, without getting those grades back I'd think you're dumb as hell. Act how smart you are, she always said. I've always been bad at that. I'm not very good at decision making.

I'm reckless, but not. It's a difficult concept to understand unless you're inside my brain, and I can't explain it very well. I'm reckless to some degree. Like now, going to a high school party where I'll by drinking my ass off. And if the cops show up? I'll be taken to the station, and get my Columbia acceptance revoked. I'm that kind of reckless. I've always had a back up plan though. If they kick me out of Columbia? I have a full ride to NYU waiting for me. I'll be okay either way.

Meg parks a few streets down from the party, and when we arrive, I run my fingers through my hair and start up the grass.

"Here's the plan if the cops show up, we meet back at the car or into those woods. Call me if they show up." Meg says, being her overly prepared self as usual.

"Okay, mom." I say while rolling my eyes.

The first thing I do when we get inside is grab a bottle of vodka and the first attractive boy I see. Meg hates the amount of boys I've hooked up with, not fully though. I lost count of how many guys after I hit 42. That was the end of sophomore year. But, I'm a virgin. See? Reckless, but not too far. In my seventeen years on this planet I had one boyfriend freshman year for two days. I got done with him pretty fast. I don't know why I won't go all the way, I go pretty damn far with them and then bail. It's like a game. One of these times I'm not going to.

It's not too long before I'm smashed and onto my third guy tonight. I don't know what's wrong with me. I guess I just get bored pretty fast. When I'm done with him I stand in the kitchen drinking more from the bottle. After about the fifth sip you don't realize how bad it tastes. The whole house stinks like weed, alcohol and sweat.

"Hey!" Meg yells over the music, and I smile, letting my arm hang loosely over her shoulder.

"See that guy right there?" I ask, drunkenly pointing at a dirty blonde football player type.

"Oh yeah! He's hot!"

"I'm going to lose my virginity to him, right now." I say calmly, just deciding that myself.

"Kate, I know you and that's not a good idea. You'll deeply regret this tomorrow morning and as your best friend, you should not do that. You say it means nothing to you but I know it does otherwise you would've done it by now. This is a bad idea." Meg says, and I roll my eyes while taking another swig from the bottle.

"It's time. I'm seventeen years old and my body is only going downhill from here. Baby, I'm going in." I say, and she grabs my wrist.

"Kate."

"Bye, bitch." I laugh, pulling away and walking towards that guy. "Hi," I say, and he licks his lips.

"How ya doin'?" He asks, bending close to my ear so I can hear him over the music.

"Pretty good," I say back, trying to stay standing. The alcohol is really starting to hit me now.

"Whoa, baby." He smirks, helping me stay straight.

"Fuck me," I whisper in his ear, pressing my lips to his jaw. He doesn't reply, he just takes my hand and leads me to a room, shutting the door behind us.

"Ain't you a sexy little thing," he says, stalking towards me. He has a hard New York accent, and blonde scruff on his sharp face. He's hot as hell.

"Come here then," I say, acting more confident than I actually am, the alcohol helps a lot.

He pulls off his shirt in one swift movement, proving that he's done this many, many times before. He drops it to the floor and makes his way over to me. I'm sitting on the edge of the bed and he steps between my legs, bending down to grab my face in his strong hands, pressing his lips forcefully against mine. I let my eyes shut and rest my hands in the waist band on the side of his boxers.

His kissing gets rough and I follow his lead, digging my nails into his back and dragging down. He lays on top of me, grabbing my hips and pulling them up to meet his. The room is spinning and my thoughts are slow and clouded. I wrap my fingers in his hair, pulling hard enough that I think I might rip his hair out. His tongue forces into my mouth and I bite down on his lower lip, dragging roughly.

He yanks my tank top over my head, then kisses from my mouth down to my waist line, gently sucking as he goes down. I shut my eyes and try not to feel the already forming regret in my stomach. Just do it, Kate. Don't pussy out like always. It's time. It means nothing.

When his lips meet mine again, I reach down and fumble with his leather belt for a while before finally getting it undone. He's now kissing my neck, biting my skin a little too hard. I unbutton his jeans, and use my feet to push them down his long legs.

He reaches for my jean shorts, slipping them easily down my legs while kissing up my thighs. He pushes down his boxers, obviously getting antsy now, and unhooks my bra.

"Do you have a condom?" I ask, and he reaches into the pocket of his jeans. He rips the top off and takes it out then puts it on. He grabs the edge of my underwear, sliding it down my legs.

All of a sudden, a huge bang echoes through the house.

"Fuck!" He yells, putting his boxers on. He wraps his t-shirt around his hand and punches out the window over the bed, grabbing me and shoving me out. I now have my bra on and jean shorts coving my ass. "Run!" He yells, and I take off, stumbling around and feeling like I'm going to throw up. I'm way too drunk for this.

The grass is dry and the cool night air feels good against my hot skin. I hear the guy that I was going to fuck running behind me, and then another bang echoes through the air and something warm sprays against my leg, and a thud hits the ground. I turn around, and feel like a can't breathe. Blood is splattered up the back of my legs and the guy that I was just about to lose my virginity to is dead on the ground, bleeding from a bullet wound in his head.