Butterflies [L.S]

🦋Conflicted

THIRTEEN
Conflicted.

Things were easy for a few days.
Harry eventually got better and desperately returned to work trying to be as careful as possible around the plant that caused him allergies.

Since he had been so busy keeping up with the greenhouse, I couldn't really get the chance to have a word with him.

Not that I was actually ready to have that conversation either.

My contract with Manchester was already signed and back in England where Liam was handling everything for me to get back in time for when practice starts.

So, things were in track and moving, but I was still left to talk to Harry about everything.

It was weighting me down to know I had to confess eventually, and every day it passed I was finding it harder to do it.

My first impulse of telling him the truth was long forgotten and now I was fearful of his reaction.

So I kept procrastinating it, making excuses to keep avoiding confrontation.

My mum called me when she found out through Liam that I was renewing.
She was happy, my sisters were too.

Probably everyone else in England were pretty much happy about it as well.

And so was I.

I know it's only been a month into my deserved vacation, but I was already missing football.
And even if it was difficult for me to see it a few weeks ago, United was my home.

I was practically raised, trained and built there.
So, in the end, I kinda knew that I would stick to my original plan and stay with them.

But, on the other hand, there was Harry.

And this place where nobody gave a shit who I was, and that was exciting too.
But it was also rather scary.

Because I knew I had to restart my life completely if I stayed.

And the more I thought about it, the less I liked the idea.

I didn't want to separate from my mother, my hometown or my siblings. I didn't want to resign my career and everything I worked so hard to get for a place where they call my favorite sport, Soccer.
I didn't want to leave behind my friends or the coach who had formed me and taught me everything I knew, my mentor.

I just couldn't.

So yes, the fear of telling Harry and the realization of having to make a decision now, was scaring the shit out of me.

Because my future in United was a sealed deal, but my feelings for Harry just kept growing.

So, what weighted more?

I heard the door of my flat opening and a few steps walking around the living room.
I walked out of the bathroom, my hair wet against my forehead as I looked around the flat, until I saw Niall standing there with a huge smile on his face.

"Tommo! Is Harry here?"

"No, he's working." - I frowned, adjusting the towel around my waist.

"Great! I saw the news man, everyone is so thrilled! I'm really happy." - He exclaimed, boxing my arm rather harshly.

"That hurts." - I said, pushing him back.

"Oh, you can take it, big man! So! Back in United! That's amazing! I was seriously worried you would end up in Australia or something."

I laughed and shook my head.

"No, I don't think I would ever leave England to be honest... maybe change to Chelsea." - I shrugged, joking, and Niall gasped in horror.