My Little Decoy

♪ Here We Go Again ♪ {23}

"And here we go again
With all the things we said
And not a minute spent
To think that we'd regret." -  Here We Go Again

When I was little, I had a motto; it was a simple phrase that haunted my footsteps like a phantom, hanging over my shoulders and whispering seductively into my innocent ears.

It will all be worth it in the end.

I would often muse that to myself whenever my mother hooked up with another man on the streets and brought him home. I would murmur that short phrase whenever I sat alone in solitude in my room, thinking about how things were going wrong. I would whisper it to myself whenever I was hiding from Marco on his drunken nights. And even now, those nine simple words pressed into my mind, urging me to believe my deal with Mark was necessary. It will all be worth it in the end.

But how long will it take for the end to come?

Pushing past the glass doors of the label company, I squinted at the sudden brightness of the sun and shielded my eyes with my hand, looking for any sign of the boys and their van. When no familiar vehicle caught my sight, I smoothed out my black skinny jeans and took a seat on the staircase leading up to the building. There was a slight breeze that made my hair billow around, making me push it back in annoyance.

"Did they just ditch me?" I muttered but my musings were interrupted by a slight vibration in the back of my jeans. Pulling out my phone, I read the new text message before scoffing and tossing it onto the stairs beside me carelessly.

How long does it take for you to piss, haha? Anyway, the new episode of Vampire Diaries is on and we just couldn't miss it. Sorry, Lacey! We'll see you in school tomorrow! -D

"Are you fucking kidding me? Vampire Diaries? I swear, they're more female than I am. They probably just want to eye-rape Nina Dobrev, or something." I sighed, rubbing the back of my head and scooping up my fallen device. Taking the steps two at a time, I jumped to the ground and headed left, veering towards the direction my house was in.

"Sturm!" I heard a familiar voice shout out and I felt my conversation with Mike pound into my skull, reminding me of his game, and how I was a simple pawn in it.

It will all be worth it in the end. I chanted silently to myself again and again, finding those words to be a comfort as it pushed away the guilt for a little while. But I knew in the end, it would always come back. With a small sigh, I plastered a happy (well, as happy as I could get) expression on my lips.

"Harnage?" I smirked, spinning around to meet his gaze. My brown locks spun around with my one fluid motion, momentarily blocking my vision. Blowing away a strand, I cocked my head to one side as he bounded up to my side.

"I'm glad I caught you. I just wanted to say that you guys did great." He grinned, giving me two thumbs up. I mockingly punched his shoulder in response.

"I know we rocked. You guys were alright too, I guess."

"So modest." Blake rolled his eyes before glancing over my shoulder. "Ah, where's the rest of your band? Are you here alone?"

I released a sigh, running a hand through my hair. "They ditched me for Nina Dobrev."

"What-? Oh, you mean the Vampire Diaries? Shit, I think I forgot to pre-record the new episode." Blake immediately flushed as I raised an inquisitive eyebrow at him. "Never mind. Do you need a ride home?"

I thought of Marco and my rundown house, and quickly shook my head. Blake didn't need to see that. "No, no. I was just... just heading off to find a place to eat. I'm starving..." I lied, keeping my expression blank. Big mistake.