Heart's Desire

Chapter 20 - Kit

 ~ Kit's Tale ~

"As a child, I thought it was simply the way of things, how my family treated me. People seldom looked at or spoke to me, except to tell me what to do, and kindness and comfort were withheld, they said, for my own good.

Of course, I noticed that my half-siblings were treated differently. They had nice clothes to wear, and nice things to eat—three times a day! They had beds to sleep in, and toys to play with, and even when they broke something or disobeyed no one struck them or made them sleep outside.

It was my own fault, for being what I am, they said. My siblings were Wolves—good and whole and pure—and they deserved to be treated well, while my father was a fox, and foxes are wicked and deceitful. My mixed blood made me dirty and disgusting, and I should be grateful the Pack was kind enough to keep me at all.

But I had to earn my keep—to be quiet and obedient, and to work hard. Otherwise, my uncle explained, they would have to let me go. With no one to claim me as their own, my wicked fox's soul would consume my human form, and I would become a wild animal, and die in the forest, alone. 

It sounded terrifying—to become a fox—and I lived in dread of it, especially as my siblings had all Shifted by the age of twelve. Claude, Stefan and Selene were celebrated for the beauty of their forms, and when they went on their first Hunt and made their first kill, they became true members of the Pack.

But my twelfth birthday came and went, and then my thirteenth and fourteenth, and still I had not shed my human form. I was relieved, but uncle Obadiah said it was just more proof of my pollution—a defect that made me less than Wolf and worse than human, even.

But I didn't think my life was so bad, considering. As long as I didn't displease my uncle, and did as I as told, I was given enough to eat and a place to sleep, and avoided the worst beatings.

It was my half-siblings who made things... difficult.

As the lowest of creatures, my purpose was to serve those better than myself, and I had to do what any Wolf asked. My brothers and sister made sure I was never idle, always giving me more tasks than I could finish in a day, which meant that I was punished. Sometimes they made a game of getting me in trouble—stealing food from the kitchen and saying I had taken it, or telling my uncle I had done some bad thing.

I feared my brothers most; if they got me alone, I seldom escaped without harm.

Even so, it wasn't all terrible. 

My favorite times were when the 'outer' families visited. They were relatives, and Pack, but not directly related to the Alpha. When they came, there was less talk of 'purity' and 'true Wolves,' no one struck me, and I was allowed to sleep inside. Best of all, I got to see little cousin Ophie, who called me her friend, and let me play with her toys, and tried to teach me things she had learned in a place called skool.

She told me things no one else ever had—that I was 'pretty,' and 'clever,' and 'sweet.' And when I told she was wrong—that I was actually ugly, and stupid, and dirty—she laughed and told me it wasn't true.

Eventually, my brothers and sister noticed that she made me happy, which was something I didn't deserve. They told on us for playing skool, and said that I had done something very bad to Ophie when we were alone, though that was a lie.

I didn't see her again for a long time, after that. 

The worst times where always at the full moon, when the Pack would practice for the Great Hunt. Being unable to Shift, and not being a Wolf, I was only suited for one role: the Prey.