The Raven

Chapter Seven: A Forgotten Gift

It's been four days since we captured the titans and my squad has been assigned to keep watch on the experimentation area. Obviously, we couldn't bring them inside the bunker, they wouldn't fit and some of the other civilians wouldn't feel too happy about it. So, we built a small holding area on the surface where Hanji currently runs her experiments.

It's my turn to take my break but rather than dismissing it as I usually do or going inside to eat, I return to ground level and walk up to the crazy squad leader. She talks amicably to the titans, jumping back and laughing her head off when they try to eat her before repeating the procedure. Most of her squad seems tense and unsure, leaping out of their skin every time Hanji needs to dodge a bite. The older members seem used to it and go about their research casually.

"How's it coming along?" I ask as soon as I reach her.

She turns towards me and looks slightly surprised at my sudden appearance. I don't meet her gaze though, my eyes are fixated on the titan that is currently staring at me like a hungry animal. I can see her push her glasses up her nose and shake her head out of the corner of my eye.

"Not too well, I'm afraid," she answers, squatting down and cocking her head at the titan. "They seem to be exactly the same as all the other research subjects."

"You've ran all the usual tests?" I ask.

"Yes, but neither show any signs of once being human. If your squad hadn't seen them turn, then I doubt we would've ever known they had. They display all the characteristics of a normal titan, dependancy on sunlight, regeneration, no intelligence, etcetera."

"What about their inner organs? Do they have a reproduction system? Digestive system? Anything different?"

She shakes her head. "No. We haven't dissected one yet but I can tell you now that they have the same build as any other titan."

"Have you touched the nape of their necks yet?"

"No, we've been saving that test for last just in case the procedure goes wrong and we lose one of our subjects." She looks at me and her eyes gleam with interest behind her glasses. "I never realised you took such an interest in titans."

"I was looking through some of your notes from previous experiments over the past few days," I admit. "I don't usually have an interest in titans unless it involves killing them."

"You're welcome to join in on the experiments if you wish."

"I appreciate the offer but I think I'll pass," I say, looking to the ground. "I just want to figure out why this is happening and stop it."

There's a hand on my shoulder and Hanji gives me an understanding look. "We all want that, Mikasa but don't let this consume you. This isn't your burden to bear, you didn't cause this."

"But I did promise that little girl I would help her," I say bitterly.

"She was beyond help. You shouldn't feel responsible for her death, it wasn't your fault."

I know she's right, it wasn't my fault, there was nothing I could've done. On the inside, I don't feel the same. There's something within me, just a tiny feeling in my gut that tells me I could've done something, to at least ease her pain. Why hadn't I just cut her down when she first started changing? Why couldn't I have saved her all that pain?

"Besides, you're helping her find peace now," Hanji says suddenly and I look at her in confusion. "You're giving her death meaning, if she had've died alone, it would've been in vain and terrifying for her but you found her and made sure she knew she wasn't completely alone. By relaying the information to me and capturing these delightful subjects for me, you're helping not only her but probably her family and the rest of mankind. Be proud of yourself."