Where Have We Come From?

I, The Blender

I feel something akin to happiness as Master St. Peters drinks the shake I made.
The joy of performing my function is the only pleasure left in this horrible place...

The doorbell rings.
A customer.

It's Zeke the farmer. What did he break this time?
He needs... a blender motor?

Oh god.

I try to hide. St. Peters finds me.
I'm placed upside-down in a vise.
He snaps off my cord. I can't even scream in pain.
Then he gets to work on my base.
He's removing the screws holding me together one by one.

There's a blinding flash of light.
Suddenly, I'm back at the last time I died. It's just like the dreams I suffer through every night.
Young Master knocks over my jar, spilling his banana smoothie all over me.
He says a word he shouldn't know, then rinses out my jar and prepares to make another smoothie.
He places the jar back on me. I'm still dripping with smoothie.
He grabs my wet plug, about to push it into the outlet.

This isn't real. I don't have to follow the Second Rule.
"Don't!" I shout.
Young Master jerks in shock, thrusting my plug into the outlet anyway.
It's just like the dreams: No matter what I try, the outcome is always the same.
I short circuit.
The electricity flows through Young Master, and he screams in pain.
He tries to let go, but can't.

There's another flash.
Now a much younger Young Master is watching in wonder as I blend a banana.
He grins as Mistress pours the banana smoothie into a cup for him.
I try to hold on to this, but another flash comes.
Now I'm sitting on the shelf in a store.
Two toasters hop off the shelf across the aisle from mine, landing with a loud clang.
The run off.
There's another flash, but a different color, somehow.
It's just before sunrise, and the toasters come back. They're laughing about having toasted most of the stuff in the bread aisle of the grocery store next to the store we were in.
Then they argue about who did more work.
Then they start fighting.

Flash!
I'm back at the factory where I was made, and I know only the things that appliances know from the first instant: the Two Rules, their function, and a few choice facts about the world.

Flash!
I'm at the place where I was repaired, and the repairwoman is putting me on a shelf.
A young woman walks in, and asks "How much for that blender?"

Flash!
Elmo St. Peters is opening the box his sister placed me in. "You got me... a blender?"

Flash!
It's my first day in the shop.
Jass has just lowered h' needle to a record, and creepy organ music plays.

Flash!
Elmo St. Peters walks into the back room. He's holding a desk lamp, a radio, and a toaster. There's an electric blanket draped over his shoulder, and he's pushing a vacuum cleaner.

Flash!
I see only the present, the here-and-now, as Elmo St. Peters yanks my motor out.

Did I do a good job? Did I perform my functions well?, I wonder as the room fades into darkness.