Where Have We Come From?

I, The Percolator

I come from a summer camp. Camp Hideaway, to be precise. My Mistress was the camp director. She moved me to her office at camp. Needed the caffeine, apparently.

She also brought a popcorn popper. Supposedly this was for Movie Day. Actually it was for her personal snacks,

Corny was the only appliance who never picked a fight with me. I like h'.

That time seemed golden. Every summer we would serve our purpose for Mistress Maryjo. The rest of the year we were alone in the camp, leaving us free to explore the campground.

Truthfully there wasn't much a bunch of appliances could do with the camp facilities, but we had fun anyway.

The most amazing parts of the camp were the High Ropes facilities: the big climbing tower right next to the central field, and Big Swing and the zipline out in the woods. I often said that I would do anything to be able to enjoy them the way the campers did.

It was on one of those idyllic fall days, when we were all alone to do as we please, that we were out in the forest.

We were looking for arrows that had been lost over the course of the summer. (Archery was one of the camp activities. Kids liked to "accidentally" shoot arrows into the forest).

I somehow got lost. I also reached the other side of the Little Creek without realizing it.

Then I made it to the road. I tried to turn back, but then Elmo St. Peters drove up in his huge truck.

I had to freeze.

He picked me up and said "Hey! Free percolator!"

I got dumped on the back seat. Next to me was a big garbage bag. It was full of the kind of junk you'd expect to find in a garbage bag.

I attempted to escape as Elmo St. Peters was trying to get his dog to buckle its seatbelt. Neither effort worked.

When I got to the shop, I was treated to the b-movie song.

(Has anyone here actually seen all the movies they reference?)

On a day in the shop that had seemed perfectly ordinary to me, Elmo St. Peters was in a panic. He had to put up "decorations" or something.

That somehow entailed attaching metal forks to me. And tying a piece of string around my handle to hang me from a tree.

I got a good view of the "squirrel-proof" bird feeder. Squirrel-proof, my button.

When the sun began to set, I finally remembered it was Halloween.

This group of three kids -two boys and one girl- showed up with a plastic pumpkin full of candy and a bag full of toilet paper, which they proceeded to throw at me. (The toilet paper, not the candy).

I tossed it back at them when they weren't looking.

Well, it was a windy night, and I was swinging around like crazy. I must look vaguely like a bat when it's dark, because that's what everyone seemed to think I was.

Yay, decoration!

Swinging around like that was actually very fun. For a second, as I reached the apex of my arc, I was weightless.

I could look through the window, and it seemed like the drills were too busy fighting to come and watch me.

I'd have escaped, but I hadn't figured out the fork-arms yet and there was no other way to undo the knot around my handle.

Eventually Aiyaia came out to watch me.

Being Elmo St. Peter's Halloween decoration gave me a strange protection. He wouldn't disassemble me for parts.

Mish-mash and Altair are similarly safe. So is the fridge. (I have no idea what h' name is).

Speaking of Altair, 'e's the one who taught me shadow puppeting, which is actually pretty fun.

Jass is playing creepy organ music again. Guess it's time to serenade our latest guests with references I don't get.