Don't Fade Away: A Solangelo Fanfiction 2

Chapter 40: Stages of Grief

"What do you mean? What's Jason?" Will asked him. Nico looked scared. He looked upset and shocked and in disbelief.

Nico was shaking a lot. He opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out of his mouth. Will didn't need to hear to wait for Nico to speak, though. He was pretty sure he knew what he was going to say.

Nico's knees gave out, so now he was sitting on the ground. Will picked him up. Nico weighed more than the last time he had held him. Will was glad for that, but now wasn't time to be glad.

Will carried Nico into the Hades cabin, and gently set him on his bed. He was shaking his head. Then he stood up.

"My powers must be wrong, right? They have to be. I mean, I was feeling a bit emotional, you know. Like, being emotional could make my powers act weird. Tell me things that aren't true. Or just do weird things. I've heard of that kind of stuff happening to people. That must be it."

"Nico, have your powers ever been wrong before?" Will said gently.

"No, but that doesn't mean that it can't happen." He had a frantic kind of look in his eyes. "That doesn't mean it can't happen."

Will stayed quiet. For once, he didn't know what to tell him.

Nico shook his head. "Or maybe my powers are off because of what happened with Leo, you know? He came back from the dead, so now my powers are messed up because of that."

He started pacing. "Jason's at school right now. He should be going to sleep soon, because it's 3 hours behind in California. He should be going to sleep soon. He's fine. He's at school. Why would something happen to him at school? If a monster came, he would be able to handle it. He's fine. Jason's fine. He's going to see me soon. 2 months, then he'll see me. He's fine." Nico laughed. "Yeah, there's no way something could happen."

"Nico, I don't think your powers are wrong."

"They are! They have to be wrong! There's no other explanation! Because he can't be- He's going to see me soon!" Nico yelled.

Nico clenched his fists. "Why would he do this?! Why?! He told me he was going to see me when summer came! He said that! He said that to me!" Nico yelled. "Why would he lie to me?! Why did Jason lie?! He can't be gone! He can't! He lied to me!"

Nico slammed his head against the wall of his cabin. "What a jerk! What a liar! Why would he tell me that, if it wasn't going to happen?!

Will felt tears forming in his eyes.

Nico slammed his head again. "Friends don't lie to their friends! They just don't!" He did it again. "I hate him!"

Will walked over to Nico and held him firmly, so he would stop.

"Let go of me!" He yelled. Nico struggled against him.

"If you want to hit something, hit a pillow. Not your head."

"No! I don't want to!"

"Nico."

"Shut up!"

"Nico, please. Don't hurt yourself."

His arms went limp, and Will let go. The anger left Nico's face, and tears started falling in its place.

Nico slid to the floor, and Will slid with him. "He said he would see me soon."

"I know." Will said, stroking Nico's hair.

"He said that we would play Capture the Flag, and we would go against each other, to see who was stronger. He said he wanted to know everything that happened between us while he was gone." He cried.

"He's my friend, Will! My first friend since I was 10 years old! He looked out for me, made sure I was okay!

"He's my best friend. He called me his little brother. Little brother! Doesn't he know that I see him as a brother, too? No! Of course he doesn't! Because I always treat people like shit! I told him whatever, even though that meant a lot to me! I do that with everybody, because I think once I get close to somebody, they won't like me! And where did that get me?! Where did that get me, huh?! Now my best friend is..... And I never got to tell him how much he means to me!" Nico said in between his sobs.

"I think he knew."

"Don't talk about him like that! Don't talk about him in the past tense! He's not in the past!"

"Okay. I think he knows."

"No he doesn't! He probably thinks that I don't like him. I'm so stupid! Why do I do that?!"

Nico hugged his knees. "Why do bad things happen to me? Why? I can't take anymore of it. It's too much. It's too much! It hurts! I can't breathe!"

"Hey, I'm here. I'm here, okay?"

"There's too many bad things! My whole life is one big tragedy, and he's the latest addition! He can't be gone, because he's supposed to come to Camp soon!"

He started shaking again. He looked like he couldn't stop crying. "Why so suddenly?"

"That's how it is sometimes. Sudden."

"But why?"

Will shrugged. "I don't really have an answer for that." He said as he rubbed his back.

"He's done so much for me, and what have I done for him?" Said Nico.

"Sometimes, you don't have to give a person anything. Jason is somebody who gives more than he receives. That's just the kind of person he is. I'm also sure that if you asked him, he would tell you that you do a lot for him, even if you don't realize it."

"I should have visited him at school. I should have been nicer to him, I should have-"

"Nico. What did you tell me? You can't focus on the past, on things you could have done."

"How can I not! Jason is gone! He's gone forever! There is no future with him involved! All I can do is look at the past!"

"Then focus on the good things. Focus on that. Don't focus on things you could have done."

"Nico, a lot of bad things have happened to you. There's no denying that. It's not fair in the slightest, but nothing's really fair, is it? You've lost so much. But you have to keep going. You know by now that rain doesn't stay forever, but the sun doesn't, either. You can only hope for the best, and prepare for the worst. And I'll be here every step of the way."

Nico dug his face into Will's shirt. "I'm not going to see him this summer, am I?"

Will didn't answer him. He just kept on rubbing his back. He didn't need to answer him when they both already knew the answer.

Jason Grace was dead.