swim || remus lupin

moral of the story

Syd,

I left the meeting tonight feeling so completely awful.

Of course I understand where you're coming from, sometimes I wish I had never gotten into the Order as well. Maybe then we wouldn't be in this whole mess with Harry.

I want you to know that it was going to be you. Lily and I chose you to be the Secret Keeper but, after last night, things just felt so torn apart. And we couldn't wait any longer and I was sure you didn't want to hear from me after I had been a total arse.

I never should have let Sirius talk to you and Remus that way. I never should have let you walk out like that. I should have had your back. I'm sorry.

Obviously I don't think either of you are the spy, and neither does Lily. We trust you with our lives, always have.

Sirius feels bad as well, though he's too bloody stubborn to admit it.

I just hope you'll reconcile things with him soon, rather than being too late. Things are too fragile right now, Syd. He and Remus will never step up first, it has to be you.

Anyways, we're in hiding now. I can't say where, strict orders from Dumbledore. Please write me, though. The owls will find us.

I love you, Squid. Don't do anything I wouldn't do while I'm gone. (And definitely don't do anything that I would do).

Hi from Harry.

'Catch' you soon ;)

Jim

"Syd," came Remus's voice from the doorway that led to the living room.

I looked up and blinked back the tears that had collected in my eyes to find that Remus was holding onto a small pot, stained white and with small flowers scattered about. The plant inside of it was dead and hanging limp over Remus's other hand.

"Oh," I said quietly, placing down James's letter. "Peter's plant."

I crossed the room and took it from Remus, running my fingers along the long and darkening stem. One of the leaves fell off and drifted sadly to my feet, signifying the official end to my friendship with Peter.

"It must have died last night," I said. "When we left."

Remus placed a hand on my shoulder and I breathed sharply through my nose, straightening up and stepping away from him.

"Um, there's a letter for you on the counter," I said, motioning towards the island and wiping my left eye quickly. "It's from Lily."

Remus nodded, shoving his hand into his pocket and moving over to the table.

Our downstairs bathroom was beach themed. It had light blue walls with sea stars that were already painted when Remus and I moved in. There was a small woven trashcan next to the porcelain sink which I pulled out to the middle of the floor.