1972

16. You Can't Hurry Love

You Can't Hurry Love- The Supremes

Flip felt, well he felt terrible. His body shook with anger as he began following you in the direction of your room. His voice was too full of emotion to say anything. He hated that he'd driven you to tears, and for what? So he could get a half-hearted halfway said 'I love you'? His footsteps followed yours until you stopped dead in your tracks to turn around and shook your head no that he stopped dead in his tracks, he knew you well enough to know what you wanted.

You wanted space.

That despite the way you were desperate to have him with you moments ago even in his anger, he'd pushed you too hard. He'd pushed you to no longer want him around and the realization of that shattered him. To the point where he was standing alone in the cold watching you walk away with what was left of his heart. The muscles in his legs felt like they had disintegrated as he stood there motionless for what felt like minutes but really it was enough time to watch you disappear from his line of sight, and then watched the sun sink out of the sky leaving him in total darkness. His head hung low in the cool autumn night, letting the wind bite red blotchy patches to his cheeks. His nose had gone numb moments before the tips of his fingers did. The lack of sunshine leaving him bitterly cold.

He wondered around the courtyard, not wanting to face his empty room, not wanting to get back into the truck that he was sure would still smell like you- it always smelt like you. He had no direction to go in, no destination in mind. His feet lead him to the pub at the far side of campus, one that he'd frequented before you before he had you to fill his time with. His drinking had never been taken to extremes but with you, he didn't need the alcohol to feel the buzz he was craving now. So into the bar he slumped, pulling off his sherpa jacket leaving it on one of the hooks that sat by the door. His mind flashing with images of your tear-stained face as he made his way to his barstool. Looking for anything to distract him from the absolute regret that filled every pore of his body. His pull to the jukebox only lasted long enough to get through three songs before he'd made his way to grab a drink. It started with one beer but it turned to four by the time he'd called Conrad.

Flip had been coming out of the bathroom when he passed the payphone, he didn't think too much of it but as he sat nursing a beer he realized he was tired of being alone with his thoughts. He dug around in his pockets until he found a dime, as he stood the room spun a bit more than it had two beers ago but he'd begun losing track. He thought about calling you multiple times but had talked himself out of it again and again. That glare you'd given him when you turned to look at him was an image he wishes he could forget, but regardless of it all and how badly he wanted to be close to you, he knew he was the last person you wanted to talk to right now.

Conrad had been a buddy of Flip's from home, they weren't particularly close but there was something about having someone around with so many shared experiences, they'd gone to the same high school, grown up in the same town, played football together, had the same group of friends which gave Flip a familiarity he just needed right now. Conrad was tall but not quite as tall as Flip, his build much lankier, he was a wide receiver whereas Flip was a lineman. His blonde hair was neatly combed as he came into the pub, his slacks pressed and his white collared shirt buttoned up, he looked like a proper gentleman and it didn't phase Flip one bit. Flip knew he was a bit rough around the edges but it was who he was, and that suited him just fine. His facial hair and lack of needing to be the best dressed in the room was something he almost took pride in, he was unapologetically himself.

"Bud, maybe you've had enough," Conrad told Flip as he began flagging down the bartender for another drink. Flip shook his hand at Conrad as he persisted to talk to the bartender.

"Another one, please. And whatever my buddy here wants too please." Flip's head turned to look at Conrad who was now standing next to Flip's frumpily slouched-over figure on the bar stool.