Symbiosis: At World's End

Regrets

Merrick was incredibly restless. Ever since his shouting match with Brianna, he'd been unable to sit still for more than a few minutes. Sure, he could occupy himself with training Jason and Kelly, but they could only go so long. He'd been thinking a lot about what she had called him. A monster.

He knew she had only called him that because she wasn't thinking straight, but it still clung to his brain. He kept flashing back to that soldier he had pushed off the roof and the woman he had nearly beaten to death a few days ago. It scared him. Was he really becoming a monster? Was this because of the symbiote?

He spent a lot of time pacing. On the floor, on the walls, occasionally on the ceiling, trying to figure out why he was acting this way and why it had only started recently. He thought deeply on what the two situations had in common. First off, in both of them, he was in a state of panic. That much he knew. Secondly, both had Jason and Kelly in danger. He had been trying to protect them.

He had told himself early on that it was the spur of the moment and his adrenaline spiking, but eventually he forced himself to accept that he had been in many similar jams, and he had never killed so much as a Ripper, as far from humanity they were. What had changed now?

The obvious answer was the symbiote, but Merrick felt that the answer wasn't obvious. If this was the symbiote, there would have been other signs wouldn't there?

He didn't talk to the symbiote about this, for obvious reasons. He already knew that it would be fruitless. Fact of the matter was, the symbiote wouldn't tell him if this was happening because of it because he would force it off if he did. Besides, he needed it, at least for now. With Jason and Kelly around, he couldn't do everything he did and protect them. Especially now that someone was hunting them.

His thoughts returned to the mysterious woman with the bow. He had encountered a few Runners with bows before, but they were not a common sight. Add to the fact that any kind of Runner was a rare sight and you had something that was just a little less rare than a wild herd of deer. Runners with bows typically travelled slower, trying to build up rations before making a slow trek to the next hunting ground. Wash, rinse, repeat.

This woman was something else though. He hadn't noticed it until he thought back on it, but the knives were very new and completely foreign to him. They were slotted on the blunt side of the blade and about two inches longer than the average knife of a Runner. Plus, her clothes didn't have nearly enough wear on them. Why was he only noticing this now?

He was interrupted by the realization that it was getting late. They had finished dinner twenty minutes ago and the siblings were getting ready to sleep. He turned and motioned for them to walk over to the opening in the wall. He lay down and stared up at the stars. They looked at him curiously.

"Do you two know anything about the night sky? The stars, constellations?"

Kelly seemed to perk up.

"Papa used to show us constellations and tell us stories about them!"

Merrick smiled a bit at her enthusiasm, but noticed her become crestfallen after a few moments.

"How many can you point out to me?"

Jason and Kelly took turns pointing them out before Merrick held up a hand to silence them.

"You know, you can tell what time of year it is by looking at the stars in the sky. You see up there, that cluster of stars tells us that it's approaching the end of summer. They also tell me that North is that way. From there, I know where South, West and East are."

Then he realized the implications of what he just said. It was approaching fall. It was going to get cold soon. He needed to start heading south. He closed his eyes and thought about it. He had left all their previously gained gear behind when they fled, so he needed to replenish his stock. He had already gotten them enough food to last them a while, but he needed to get more water. Luckily, there were some freshwater ponds and rivers along the path, based on the constellations. Plus, there were actually a lot of wild roots and other foods he could find along the way. Still, he couldn't leave it to chance.