Lust & Sorrow & Comfort | Jaedotae

八

I see you got that new Mercedes
I might let you drive me crazy
Usually
I ain't the type to stay
'Cause you could fall in,
and go psycho
Ain't no tellin'
where this might go
But I take my chances either way

So come and fuck my life up

- FML by Arizona Zervas

Taeyong had found a new hobby over the weeks. That hobby was Doyoung.

Doyoung.

Everything about him.

He loved seeing him, talking with him, cooking with him and especially, he loved flustering him.

It was always a nice feeling. Taeyong absolutely loved the fact that he was able to affect the younger's mood.

He loved that he was the reason that Doyoung's would throw his head back in laughter with a wide smile that showed off his perfect teeth.

It made him smile too.

But, he also felt guilty. After all, he did have a very amazing boyfriend that he loved unconditionally.

He knew that Jaehyun was a great person, and marriage was always a sure thing that neither of them physically acknowledged but were always mentally sure of.

Taeyong knew that he was in love with Jaehyun. So, why would he ever feel this way about Doyoung?

He wasn't falling out of love, he could never. He was hopelessly in love with the younger leader, both mentally and physically.

It was more like his heart's capacity simply expanded, and just as their own mafia had become co-leading, his heart had started co-sharing.

Nothing made sense anymore. As if love wasn't complicated enough. Now another person had been added, as if this was a dramatic novel love triangle.

While all of this happened, there was always someone else there too.

Everyday, Jaehyun grew more annoyed inside.

Annoyed, at himself that is.

He hated the way he felt.

Everyday that Jaehyun saw Taeyong and Doyoung being unnaturally close, he felt that he should be ripping them apart.

He should warn Doyoung that getting close to his boyfriend wasn't a good idea.

Instead, he laughed along with the two whenever one would make a joke.

Whenever he looked at the two, he always felt conflicted.

He was supposed to hate all of this. He was supposed to look at the two in anger and get mad that Taeyong was so shamelessly flirting with another man in front of him.

Instead, every time he looked at them he felt a little more content with life.

Everything about it was terrible, and it only made his love-hate relationship with Doyoung grow stronger.

He wanted to tell him off, but protect him at the same time. Every time he got pissed, a swelling in his heart would take its place instead.

Was this even normal? To feel so conflicted, confused and, well, in like.

Yes, that was it.

Like.

That was what Jaehyun and Taeyong would always try and convince themselves of.

They simply liked Doyoung, as friends, maybe something slightly more.

Though of course, none of this went unnoticed by their object of affection and desire.

Alrhough the two leaders were very clueless and in denial about their feelings, Doyoung wasn't.

He knew that he very much liked both Taeyong and Jaehyun, and it was honestly, pretty obvious with the way he would blush around them so much.

It was honestly mind blowing how the leaders hadn't already discovered the ex-spy's secret crush.

The only thing that stopped him from really flirting back or properly acknowledging the gazes trained on him, courtesy of Taeyong and Jaehyun, was the two's relationship.

Doyoung wasn't a home wrecker, and since he had romantic feelings for the two, he wouldn't go out of his way to hurt them.

Plus, if they broke up he also had to think about how messy that could become for the rest of Neo Tech.

So for now, he just blushed whenever Taeyong purposely flustered him and stuttered unintentionally when Jaehyun gave him his usual piercing stare, for which he couldn't tell if it was a good or bad thing.

But one thing he didn't get was that the two leaders were very madly in love, everyone could see that. So, why were they always so focused on him?

They helped him a lot and were always very warm to him, which made him feel quite confused on their relationship.

Meanwhile, the rest of Neo Tech never knew what was going on between the three males.

Whenever the three were in a room together, the amount of sexual tension was almost overbearing.

All fourteen of the other males were painfully aware of how much the leaders were interested in Doyoung, and how the male obviously returned those feelings of romance.

Since the three had experience in the field, Jeno, Renjun and Jaemin often tried to talk to the clueless men but most of the time they would just get a there's-no-way-that-could-be-true response.

Frustrating? Incredibly to say the least.

Often times the younger members would get together just to laugh at how daft the three men were being.

Doyoung's role as being a prime negotiator for deals with other mafias basically made him the third leader, which only raised the other members' jokes of how three incredibly skilled people could be so stupid.

Of course, all of these comments and jokes were said behind their backs. No one wanted to deal with any glaring or scolding or god forbid idiotic speeches of denial about their feelings.

Besides that, Doyoung would often complain to Yuta and Sicheng about his feelings, talking about how he was conflicted about what to do.

Was he supposed to flirt back? Ignore them? Just sit there?

He tried to be subtle about the identities of his crushes, always referring to them in a past tense and saying they were old agents from N Culture, but the couple knew better.

Everything was so obvious it almost physically hurt the mafia to see the three interact.

They always wanted to scream at the three for being the way that they were, but unfortunately they couldn't.

In the end, everyone was either confused, in denial, or annoyed.

~

Hey guys :) New chapter with a bit of a different format!