Back-Up Plan - Book 1 - S.E.

Silly love songs

"All right, guys, I have one word for you." Mr. Schue announced with a smile and, before he could even start the class that week, Winnie was already over it.

"Brittany." The teacher called when the blonde raised her hand.

"Is it love?" Brittany asked, reading off the word from the whiteboard. She smiled when Mr. Schue nodded. "I'm totally going to graduate now."

"Valentine's Day is coming up, so for this week's lesson, I want you guys to pick a partner, because you're going to sing to them what you think is the world's greatest love song." Mr. Schue said.

"Oh, come on..." Winnie groaned quietly, with a big roll of her eyes, gagging playfully when Mike and Tina turned to each other, telepathically discussing the song they would be singing to each other or something.

"Yeah, find a song that communicates all the things that love means to you." Mr. Schue continued. "Now, partner up."

"Mr. Shue, can I say something?" Finn stood up, walking toward the middle of the class when the teacher nodded. "I just wanted to point out that for the first time, an entire week has gone by without any one of us getting slushied. I think the fact that I led the football team to a Conference Championship might have something to do with it. Fact is that I'm the closest thing that this Glee Club has to a celebrity right now. And just like a famous athlete, I want to give to a charity. You guys."

Winnie scoffed.

"The amount of stupidity that just came out of your mouth..." She mumbled as Mercedes sent her a nod of agreement.

"So, I'm setting up a kissing booth for a dollar a smooch, and donating the proceeds to Glee Club to help us..."

"Don't even act like you're trying to help this Glee Club out." Mercedes called him out before Finn could continue with his insane idea. "You just want to kiss a bunch of girls."

"I've kissed Finn, and can I just say? Not worth a buck." Santana smirked as everyone chuckled quietly. "I would, however, pay a hundred dollars to jiggle one of his man-boobs."

"Do you ever get tired of tearing other people down?" Finn turned to glare at Santana, who just shrugged.

"No, not really."

"Cause you always just seem to be meddling in everybody else's business."

"Oh, please." Santana rolled her eyes. "You guys love me. I keep it real, and I'm hilarious."

"Actually, you're just a bitch." Lauren responded, to which Winnie turned to her, surprised.

"Okay. I'm sorry. You've just got eyes for my man."

"Okay, first of all, I'm not your man." Puck spoke up.

"And Finn is right." Quinn argued. "All you ever do is insult us. Three weeks ago, you said you were disappointed that I didn't have a lizard baby."

"Five minutes ago, you said Mr. Shue belonged in a twelve-step program." Tina added.

"Wait. What?" Mr. Schue frowned.

"You're addicted to vests." Santana shrugged again, still unbothered.

"The truth is, Santana, you can dish it out, but you can't take it." Rachel said. "Okay, maybe you're right. Maybe I am destined to play the title role in the Broadway musical version of Willow, but the only job you're going to have is working on a pole!"

At that, everyone turned to Rachel, surprised. Even Santana seemed shocked for a second before she stood up from her chair and walked out of the room.