Leaving me

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Tom and I treasure the next two weeks together like it is our last weeks together ever. We still go to work as we were, still seeing each other all day, but the best thing that we do is go to our field every single night. My head is now filled with precious memories that are going to help me hang on to Tom whilst he is away. Today is the day that Tom is going to leave for America. My heart aches and my head is filled with worries about things that might happen in the future. We are waiting at the airport for his flight to be called.

"Flight to New York, Gate 11," The speaker says. My heart drops knowing he is leaving for 8 months, I still haven't gotten over it yet. I cling to him and he hugs me not wanting to let go. My heart pounds and my head swirls. Droplets of sweat begin to form. I can't see straight anymore my eyes are overfilling with tears. So are Tom's.

"Hey, I will call you every night, maybe the cast can even say hi," Tom says rubbing my back and resting his head on top of mine  

"Yeah, I am going to miss you so much, Tom," I say tightening my grip

"Love you," Tom says making me look into his eyes. I know he has to leave now.

"24/7," I say before giving him one last hug and kiss. Then he is gone. I see him through a window and mouth 'I love you' and he mouths '24/7'. Tears are still streaming down my face when a young kid comes and taps me on the arm.

"Was that Mr Loki?" The kid asks, looking excited. I kneel down beside him.

"That was Loki and he is going on a big adventure," I say trying to wipe the tears from my face.

"Wow, are you with Mr Loki?" he asks whilst looking at me then at the plane.

"Yes, yes I am, he is very good at playing tricks with his magical powers," I say making the kid burst with joy and run to his parents saying he met Loki's wife, which made me laugh. After ages of staring out the window watching planes come and go, I start to walk to the car saying goodbye to the young boy, who asks for a picture with me. Now that is surprising. I get to the car and sit there for what feels like hours before starting the drive back to the house.

As I pull up in the driveway, I instantly get greeted by Charlotte giving me a hug. She knows what I am feeling and doesn't want to let go until she knows I am ok-ish about the situation. She pulls me to the sofa and brings over a mug of tea and chocolate bar. Inside I am dreading everything in the future, how am I going to live without Tom? I can't. Charlotte tries her best for the next few weeks. She gets me out of the house, takes me to visit places and reassure me that it will be ok.

It has been a few weeks and I am still not used to Tom being away, I miss him dreadfully. I have called him every night though, which is settling, he catches me up on everything and even introduces me to the cast, as promised. I always try and put on a brave smile for our calls,  but occasionally fail. Tom clearly misses me too, with all his heart and wishes we could be together once more. it is hard to call him because of the time difference but we manage.

It is the morning of a beautiful sunny day and I check my phone for any important messages. Of course, I have one from Tom telling me he misses me and loves me, but there is a second message from my mum. it says.

Hey sweetie, I understand Tom has left for a while, would you like to meet up and we can talk, maybe get lunch? hope you are ok Hunny xx Love you.

I reply with

Hey Mum, would love to meet up today and talk. meet me at the park xx Love you.

I think it is going to be nice to talk to my mum about the situation face to face. After a while of getting ready and hanging out with Charlotte and James, I leave to walk to the park. Like always I have to run as fast as I can to try and not be incredibly late. I make it and sit down on a nearby bench trying to get my breath back. Everything that just happened reminds me of when I met Tom in this park and he was behind me. I turn around and sure enough, he isn't to be seen anywhere. I do, however, see my mum out of the corner of my eye and a smile spreads over my face. I get up and make my way over.

"Hey mum, let's sit down. It is good to see you," I say guiding her to a bench.

"Hey sweetie, please tell me how are you feeling about Tom not being here?" She says rubbing my hand

"I feel lost without him. Like I don't have someone to cry on apart from Charlotte," I say keeping my tears back. 

"Aw sweetie, talk to me. Sometimes it is good to get it off your chest," She is right; I need to tell her everything. I tell her about the first time I met Tom right up to the last kiss we had at the airport. My gut is swirling remembering all the times he held me. My mum seems comforting and is a great listener. Maybe too good. She seems like she is trying to get stuff out of me yet it is just memories of me and Tom. At least I feel comfort. It has been hours of sitting with her and talking, so I decide it's time to go home.

"Thank you for coming mum, let's see each other tomorrow," I say helping her up.

"Yes, sweetie see you then," She says starting to walk away towards her house. I walk towards mine, greeting a few people on the way. I then bump into the same little boy from the airport.

"Mummy look! Its Loki's wife!" He shouts, I kneel down beside him again

"What's your name?" I ask

"Thomas," He says looking at his Loki doll.

"Well, Thomas I can tell you are going to be just like Loki when you're older. Brave, clever and such a charmer," I say hoping he will be happy

"Yay! Mummy did you hear that I am going to be like Loki!" Thomas shouts as he runs back to his mother. This makes me smile and I carry on walking back home. It is a sunny day so the walk is peaceful, all I do is notice the birds and trees go by and without really watching where I'm going. I walk into a tall muscular man.

"Oh I am so sorry about that, I wasn't watching where I was going," I frantically apologise.

"It is quite alright, my apologies for also not looking where I was going," He says in reply.

"Dylan," He says holding out his hand 

"Hannah," I say shaking it. 

"Anyway see you around, Hannah," Dylan says as he walks past me on his way to the cafe. He seems nice, at least he wasn't a dick about me walking into him. I make my way back home and slump down on the sofa. Charlotte walks in seconds later with a smile.

"Heyyyy Hannah, you doing anything tonight?" Charlotte says as she sits down next to me.

"No, why? Charlotte what have you planned?" I say getting worried as she never uses this tone.

"Movie night?" She says into my ear, a smile forms on my face. She thinks she knows my answer.

"No thanks, I am too tired," I say getting up and starting to walk away 

"Wait...what? Hannah are you ok?" Charlotte says standing up and walking over to me, whilst I have my back to her. 

"Kidding! of course, I want to do a movie night. I am not a total freak!" I say as I jump around to face her causing her to lose her breath in shock, from my jump scare. She holds her heart and starts to catch her breath. It reminds me of Tom and when I scared him. 

"I will get you back for that" Charlotte says laughing as she gets the snacks. We both settle down and start to watch the movie, of course, it's Marvel, but I don't want to watch Loki so we are watching Captain America.

"Damn that is America's ass," Charlotte says as she munches on the popcorn.

"Ouch," James says entering the room to join us. Charlotte and I are trying to hold back the laughter but fail completely. After watching all Captain America films we have passed out on the sofa. Charlotte and James in each other's arms, all cute and me hugging a big pillow. Not so cute. I wake up at 6 am and my mind goes to one thing. I forgot to call Tom last night and I have 5 missed calls. Shit. I still can't believe it has been a month since Tom left.


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