Chapter 33 Ceremony

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:Jack:

The ceremony. She finally agreed.

I sigh and let Atticus fix my tie.

When he's finished checking me over, he smiles at me. "It has been an honor, Master Jack. I'm pleased to say the Moon Goddess picked a good one."

"A fucking stubborn one, too."

He chuckles. "I will go check on the girls to see if they are ready. I suggest you hurry your ass outside. The pack is waiting."

"Thanks, Atticus." I set a hand on his shoulder. "It means a lot to me."

He nods, smiling. Soon, he's gone.

I groan and sit down on a chair, burying my face in my hands. 

I'm doing it all over again. They didn't call me the most feared for no reason. It was because I killed her, too. My mate. She was a slut who deserved it, but it doesn't make me feel any better. Plus, it hurt like a bitch when I did. It was out of anger. I couldn't control myself. Accalia was the one who was pissed, mostly. I was too wound up in being in love, I was blinded. I didn't see how bad she was for me. So I killed her. And that was that. The only people who know are Shane and Tyler. I couldn't bare to put all that weight on my pack's shoulders. I told them she died in war. I didn't even fucking bury her. My betas are too good to me. They buried her. They kept my secret. They know of everything I've done, because they've always been there. There my guys. I don't know where I would be if they weren't in my life. They were the ones to tell me to back off for Ellana, and take it slow.

And, my parents. I killed them, too. My real mom died of natural causes. Gravity is natural. My father was... Just fucking stupid, man. He's the one who pushed my mom off the building. I fucking hated him. He turned abusive after he killed her. I was maybe ten. Then he found a hoe to put up with him when I was fourteen, his second chance. As soon as I shifted, I started training in wolf form, as well. I trained day and night, building up my strength and anger. My father's mate was also abusive. His beta, too. That's why I locked his beta up. His mate was next. I killed her myself. By the time I was done with her, her tears were silver. I slayed my father in a battle. I was seventeen, then. I was dangerous. I wasn't stable. That's the only reason I killed him in my weak state. 

But, I'm stronger now. I don't have to worry about them. I just wish my mom was here. I wish she could meet Ellie. She would've loved her. If only my mom and I fucking realized how much of a wreck he was. 

A hand is placed on my back.

I didn't hear him come in.

My eyes meet Shane's blue ones.

"Hey, he's not here, anymore. It's just you and Ellana, now. He doesn't have an impact on your life, okay? He doesn't get to change this day if he's not even alive."

"I'm the one who fucking murdered him."

"Would you rather him be here?"

I don't reply. We both know the answer, so what's the point in saying anything?

He wipes my cheek with his thumb.

I glare at him and swat his hand away. "You care too much."

He chuckles. "I have to deal with an emotional teenager. I know how to handle this stuff."

"Tyler's a teen?! Jesus Christ!"

His hearty laugh makes me smile. "Well, he's almost twenty. He's turning twenty in a few days, actually. Wait- how do you not know this? We're your best friends." He places a hand over her heart and sniffs at the same time I do, though mine is for my runny nose.

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