cesabutterfly12

Taking a break from re-publishing for now because I have things to do today. I plan to continue soon while my profile is under construction.

cesabutterfly12

Hey everyone! I am revamping my Wattpad. As you can see, all of my works that were once available are unpublished. This is Phase 2 of my rearrangement of online spaces. 
          
          If you desperately miss my writing, you can find me  at https://mamacesawrites.tumblr.com/ 
          
          Don't fret, some of my work will be back after some heavy revisions! Along with possible new content...? 
          
          Thank you to those of you who used to read my work! And if you secretly still read it, well, thank you for your dedication. 
          
          That's all for now. Until next time

cesabutterfly12

I know I've moved off of this site for good, most of my writing is on Ao3 or Tumblr. However I said I would still leave my writing up here, even if unfinished. 
          As I've grown up and learned more about representation in media (especially stereotypes written into fanfiction), I have decided to take down Melody of Night. 
          I had already abandoned the story. I thought I'd leave it up on the off chance of gaining more attention which would possibly motivate me to come back to it. 
          
          Still, though no one has outright said so to me, I have realized in thinking about it that I wrote my characters of color (Particularly Rosa) with very racist stereotypes. I wrote my queer characters with underlying predatory tendencies. I had originally intended the story to be between a minor and adult teacher. 
          
          For a long time, especially when I was younger and had first started the series, I had these ideas of what queer people and people of color acted like. I had, without thinking, given into these stereotypes and tropes without a second thought. I was young. I should have known better given how I grew up in an area where I lived with mostly people of color. 
          
          My youth and ignorance is not an excuse for keeping it up this long. Even as I've grown as an ally (and queer person myself), I still did not think about how my old story I abandoned here could hurt people. 
          
          As I get increased attention on social media, it becomes clear that my words carry more weight than before. Words I said in the past and in the present. 
          
          I have hurt people with that fanfic, without even being told. Like I said no one came to me about this. I came to this conclusion and made this decision on my own.
          
          The characters I created still live in my head, but they have grown along with me and no longer fit in the story I had written here. Maybe someday I'll revise it and put it back here. Most likely I won't. 
          
          Sorry if this was long and drawn out. I just felt lile I owed explanation and apology.

cesabutterfly12

New chapter of the Melody of Night. Don't look at me like that. I started writing poetry again now that things have settled, then I was reading what I had published and realized that ya'll deserved at least to know how this one ends. I have too many incomplete projects, I might as well finish one.
          
          
          I still have a baby, and a wedding to plan, and a depressive episode to kick so be patient. Though if you want updates, be sure to give feedback on the story so it motivates me to create more, thanks!