❝ when imagining an Annalisa, imagine all the beguiling charm and allure granted to the goddess Aphrodite and mix it with the radiance and grandeur of every star that has ever shone. ❞
Interviewer: *clears throat* So, person who refuses to tell us her name, what is your favourite book of all time?
Me: You idiot, you just gave away my gender. And my favourite book, or books in my case, are The Mortal Instrument Series, Everything Everything, The Slated Series, Red Queen, One Of Us Is Lying, The-
Int: Shut up, they're getting bored now and so am I. Do you want them to keep scrolling and scrolling and scrolling and scrolling-
Me: OK. That's enough. I think they get it. Plus I paid you to do this so stop complaining.
Int: Technically I'm just a random guy you found on the street who you gave a Mars bar to do this for you.
Me: Technicalities. Next question.
Int: *rolls eyes* What are you terrible at?
Me: *glares at interviewer* That wasn't one of the questions I wrote down for you. In fact, throughout this whole session, you've barely followed the script at all.
Int: I know. I just really want to find out what you're bad at so I can rub it in later.
Me: You know what? Fine. I suck at Math and Science and all things logical. I mean in Chemistry in an experiment I completely disobeyed the instructions to try and turn the chemical a pretty shade of purple for goodness sake! I blew it up!
Int: Um, okay. You can calm down now and put the table lamp down. What are you good at?
Me: Not much.
Int: Yay, the last question. What's your favourite book on Wattpad?
Me: I have a few: , Soulmate, I sold myself to the devil for vinyls, F.A.I.T.H, Lupus Deus, Cinderelliot, No Capes, Vigilante and loads of other ones so go read them. Now. Like, seriously.
Int: One last question.
Me: You said that was the last question.
Int: Can I use your bathroom?
Me: Get out of my house.
backup - @alluringtragedies
- probably off in a daydream somewhere
- JoinedApril 2, 2015