UNEDITED
33. A LIE I TELL MYSELF
Moments passed before Hope had realized what had just happened. The air stilled, the once sun-filled air became stale with distaste and the sun seemed to hide from the building river of pain in the tribrid's gut.
Hope didn't exactly know what to do.
She stood still in the very same spot Draco had just broken up with her. The spot where he had broken what little trust she had in those around her. The one thing she was most afraid of had happened, and now she didn't know what to do.
Her usual eccentric blue eyes seemed to darken as she stared at the ground where the slight scruff from his shoes still sat. Looking into her eyes was like staring into the bottomless pit of the ocean floor. There was no light in them anymore.
Only complete darkness.
She could feel the rage inside of her clawing at the bottom of her spine, clasped together with the unforgiving dejection that made her eyes well up with unshed tears.
Her lips quivered, eyes blinking as she looked up from the spot where he had stood minutes ago. She couldn't hear anything besides her own uneven breath. Her heart hammered against her chest so hard she thought it might jump from her chest. Human nails turned into those of her wolf, blue depths began swirling with molten gold.
The still air seemed to sway now. Magic heavy in the air that couldn't be contained within the tribrid. It was raging, it wanted out. Hope closed her eyes, trying to maintain the magic, trying to keep herself in check. But for some reason, this time, it wouldn't be contained. Because instead of listening to her, the magic swelled in her chest so much that it burst from within her as she screamed loudly.
Her auburn hair flew in every direction as the magic pulsed from her body. Hands clenched, knees bent, her eyes changing from blue to gold every other second. The classroom wasn't made to contain such magic. The forest seemed to be blown away, turning back into regular desks and chairs as the intense magic of Hope Mikaelson broke the spell on it.
When Hope's scream died down she fell to her knees as a sob escaped her. She couldn't think about anything but the words that left Draco Malfoy's mouth. How could he say that to her? She couldn't fathom it, but it happened. It happened and as much as she tried to think of some way to fix it, fix them, she couldn't.
"...you're a freak."
"You're worse than a mudblood. Worse than any bloody animal I've ever seen."
"We're through, Mikaelson."
It was all too much. The pain was too much. After everything, they had been through. Everything the two had fought so hard to become and protect. She saw past everything everyone said was bad about him, seeing it as a small flaw that would never make her leave him. How could he not look past the one flaw she had? Why couldn't he look at her and still see the girl he called his little witch?
Her hands went to either side of her face as her body fell to the side, curling into itself as she withered in pain. The tribrid didn't know how she would come back from this. She thought she had found the one. She thought Draco would be with her forever. There was nothing that could come between them, but yet, here she was, without him, crying.
Hope shook her head, she couldn't let him do this to her.
The tribrid tried to get up from her curled position on the half dirt floor and half cement floor, but couldn't find it in herself to actually lift herself up. Would it be bad for her to stay there like that? Would it be so bad to allow herself to grieve? She felt like she had done it so many times before she even arrived at Hogwarts that she couldn't bring herself to care. Tears fell silently from her eyes, falling into the soil below her face.
For hours she stayed like that.
Head pressed against the moist soil, some of it sticking to the side of her head and into her hair. One arm laid across her stomach, completely open-palmed, the other laid out against the part of the floor that was now turned back to cement. Her body felt like it was numb, with no way to move even if she truly wanted to.
Hope Mikaelson was once again broken, and this time, she didn't know how she would bring herself out of it.
The next morning Hope woke up with her face still pressed against the soil, body numb and cold. The sun was gone now, as was the rest of the spell that had kept the room in the form of a forest. Some parts still held small amounts of soil or water, but most of it was an old empty classroom like it had been before it was gifted to her.
The tribrid huffed as she finally took it upon herself to sit up from the freezing floor. Her hand dragged on the cement as she cracked her back and stared blankly ahead of her. Standing up she turned to look at the damage she had inflicted, which turned out to be worse than she thought. She had completely broken the spelled room.
Pieces of blown apart bark could be seen on random spots of the classroom carpet that sat in the middle of the floor, puddles of water where the lake had once been, and blots of soil stained into the original cement flooring.
Hope huffed as she began walking toward the door. She figured by the time she got back to the previously shared classroom he would be gone. She knew he wouldn't stay there. She readied herself as she opened the door and plastered a smile on her reddened face.
Her cheeks were puffy now from the night's crying, and she could only hide so much as she hurried through the mostly empty hallways on her way back to the spelled classroom.
The moment she stopped in front of the door she could feel the shift in the air. She could feel the once happy atmosphere completely dissipate. It was now solemn, clinging to the once happy memories that played through the tribrid's head over and over again. Hope breathed in once before turning the doorknob and walking into the room.
The bed was made, and all of Draco's belongings were gone. It was like she had never shared a night with the Slytherin here in the first place. More tears pulled in the backs of her eyes, but she wouldn't let them fall this time. She couldn't let it happen again. She couldn't let herself be swallowed by the darkness waiting deep down within her.
If she did, it would be the worst thing to ever possibly happen to her.
And Hogwarts.
She supposed she got it from her Aunt Rebekah, the ability to cry about it and then act as nonchalantly about it as possible. Or maybe it was just from her past experiences that she could do this now. She swallowed the lump in her throat as she showered and dressed in a new set of clothes.
Grabbing her things she waved her wand and transported them to her room where she was headed. First, she stood by the door of the classroom, wondering where it had all gone wrong. Although she knew it was her own fault. Right? Shaking her head she took the spell down, tempted to use a spell she had once seen in her grandmother's grimoire that could erase her memory.
Instead, she opted for leaving the classroom and heading back to her room in the Gryffindor tower. She held her head high and tried to not search for him by any means. But they did. Her eyes wandered around every corner thinking he would be there to apologize to her and tell her why he had done what he had done. But he never came out. He never came into her view once as she walked the halls, only a few students that stayed behind for winter break.
It wasn't until she was back at the Gryffindor tower that a fellow Gryffindor smiled at her and told her "Merry Christmas!" It was then that she swallowed her sadness once again and said it back, a lot less enthusiastic. She kept to herself the rest of the way to her room, which felt just as cold as the previous two rooms she had just left.
This one was empty as well, with no light in the field of darkness. She wanted to cry again. She wanted to yell and let her magic lash out at any and everything that dared to get in her way. But she didn't. She just stood there in the middle of her room after closing the dorm room door and stared at the presents gathered on her bed.
"Well, Merry Christmas to me, right..?"
Hope sat on the edge of her bed with her presents on either side of her. Playing with the carpet with the heel of her boot she felt something inside of it sliding down toward her. She raised a brow at herself and lifted her foot onto her lap and pulled the boot off of her foot.
Out fell a small satin maroon-colored bag that was shut with a drawstring. Both brows raised this time as she picked it up, and slowly, the realization came to her.
This must be something left behind by Draco.
She left it there on the ground, staring at it before taking in a short breath and turning toward the presents that wouldn't make her cry for the rest of the night. She saw a blue wrapped present that said "To Hope, From Aunt Freya" The tribrid smiled and tore the wrapping paper swiftly, throwing it to the ground and taking the lid off the cardboard box. On top of everything was a Christmas card of Aunt Freya's family, Rebekah, and Marcel.
It seemed they had all gotten together for the holidays. It made her happy that her family was getting together like that. It made her happy in every way and brought a smile to her face. She couldn't remember the last time she herself had spent the holidays with her family back in New Orleans, but the more she thought about it, the more she wanted to leave Hogwarts and go back home.
What more was there to lose? What more did she have to think about? No one at The Salvatore School even noticed she was missing, or rather, they didn't care enough to find her.
Hope huffed as she moved the card to the side and took out the beautiful maroon-colored dress she knew her Aunt Rebekah had picked for her from her travels in Paris. She smiled longingly, wishing she could leave her dorm room and go to Paris with her Aunt Rebekah.
The dress was beautifully intricate, an off-the-shoulder dress that singed at the waist and had an A-line skirt. The tulle made the bottom half fluff out, which Hope knew would make her feel like a princess. Along the waistline were small diamonds encrusted within it. It was everything Hope was and more. Her Aunt Rebekah knew her well.
At the very bottom of the box was a gift she knew was from Marcel. It was a bag of cracklin', seasoned pork grinds that she would often get as a child from one of the vendors along with the market. She smiled and instantly opened the bag to smell the most amazing snack she would always remember from her hometown. She popped one in her mouth and closed the bag, placing it back in the box and moving on to the next gift.
The next gift was from Apollo, her best friend who was now on vacation with his new official boyfriend. She smiled gently as she thought about how happy he was the last time she saw him. His gift was wrapped as well, so she quickly unwrapped the gift paper and stared down at what looked to be a vintage journal.
She opened it to the first page, eyes staring at a note that didn't look entirely like Apollo's handwriting. Opening the note she saw it was actually Blaise's handwriting. The note brought tears to her eyes and she knew it would have been an amazing gift, but now it was like a slap in the face.
Blue Eyes,
I found this gem in Draco's trunk the other night. It looks finished, the journal that is. He's been writing in it every day for a while now. And it looks like it's meant for you. I hope he doesn't hate me for telling you that his weakness is you, although, we all knew you were. Wink, wink. It's quite lovely, the way he speaks of you. Do read it, and make sure he knows how much you love him because this journal will tell you how much he loves you.
Love, you amazing bestie,
Blaise
P.S., Apollo wanted to get you a lame pair of boots. I took over your gift, obviously, you can thank me later. ;)
Hope didn't want to open the journal any further. Instead, she opted for setting it aside and getting to all the other gifts. A book about her great-grandfather from Hermione, a bag of treats and a Gryffindor blazer from Harry, and a new journal with a lion on it from Ron. There were a few more gifts, one from the Weasley twins, one from Luna, and one from the fill-in alpha of her mother's pack. She was grateful so many people thought of her that Christmas. It brought a smile to her eyes as she got up to pick up the wrapping paper from her floor.
Scooping it all up in her arms she placed it on her bed and pulled out her wand. She muttered a short spell under her breath and watched as all the trash disappeared from the top of her bed. When her eyes settled on the gifts on her bed she sighed heavily. Taking off her other boot she could now walk properly instead of wobbling, and then she shook off her coat and let it drop to the ground with a huff. Her eyes darted to the satin bag on her floor that had been under the wrapping paper.
She wasn't ready to know what was inside, but she also didn't think she would ever be ready to know what was inside. She now had a journal that she knew Draco had written to her, even if it wasn't yet meant to be in her hands, as Blaise had said, and now she had a gift that she was sure he must've forgotten about when he left her.
It hurt her heart to think about it. Those words. When he left her. It hurt to know that he willingly did so after shattering her heart into millions of pieces. But now it had happened and what she thought was love was nothing more than a pass of time she now wished she could make herself forget. As a tear rolled down her face she slowly walked over to the satin bag and picked it up, examining it before taking in a breath and untying the drawstring holding it closed.
She peered inside, scared of the feeling she knew she would feel upon seeing it. As her eyes flooded inside of the bag more tears began to spring to her eyes. It was beginning to hurt even more now. This feeling of loneliness like never before, and the heartache that went along with it.
With trembling fingers, she pulled out a bracelet with a green and silver marbled bead that sat beside a maroon and gold marbled bead. A lion head and a snake's body were engraved in the beads, making Hope's face morph from utter sadness, to a longing hope that Draco would come back to her.
Before she knew it she was slipping it onto her wrist and tightening the chain. She stared at the silver contrasting with her pale wrist, the beads glistening under the light of her room. It was beautiful, but now it meant nothing.
At least, to Draco, since he left it without regard in the world. She wanted to rip it off of her wrist. She wanted to throw it into the enchanted forest after breaking it into billions of pieces. But instead, she pulled out her wand, put all her new gifts in the trunk at the front of her bed, and changed her clothes into pajamas.
With the bracelet still sitting on her wrist she pulled it to her chest, holding the chain tightly with her free hand, and began to cry once again.
How could he do this to her? How could he abandon her after promising her forever? Wasn't that what he had agreed to?
Always and forever?
The following days went by in a blur for Hope Mikaelson. She didn't feel anything other than the full pain inside her chest every time she was awake. In fact, it hurt so much that she tried her best to stay asleep so she didn't have to feel anything.
The bracelet sat on her wrist tightly, so tight it almost cut off her blood circulation. Instead of taking it off and putting it somewhere out of sight, she kept it there for some unknown reason.
She thought it was an unknown reason, but in reality, she wanted it there to remind her that she was still capable of feelings.
It was now one week into the break. Christmas came and left, and now the new year was staring Hope in the face. She had thought she would be able to look forward to the new year with... him... with Draco. But, obviously, that notion had changed drastically. All Hope had to look forward to was... well, she couldn't actually come up with anything at the moment.
Maybe it was to see her friends after the two-week break. Or maybe to end the school year and hopefully never return.
Nothing else ran through her mind but that. Not even the knowledge of the dark lord, Voldemort, who she now knew she would have to defeat one day. Or at least lend the power to Harry to do it since she was born too late.
It all gave her a headache that she chose to dive into. She let it seep into her skin and basked in it. It was the only thing that took her mind off of the fact that she was brutally dumped by the person she thought might have been the one.
Hope groaned in her bed, rolling onto her side and staring at the bracelet on her wrist. A shaky breath left her chest as she sat up slowly and threw her legs over the edge of the bed. As slow as a snail she got up on shaky legs and walked to the foot of her bed where her trunk sat.
The brown leather trunk opened with the flick of her wrist, and inside she could see the Christmas presents she got days ago that she had forgotten about. Rummaging through the mess on top of everything she finally found what she was looking for.
The prism.
The edge of the tribrid's mouth quirked for a millisecond. Then it fell when she began to think of what her conscience would show her. What her conscience would say to her. Taking a deep breath, the tribrid sat on the edge of her bed and set the prism down on her lap.
"Okay prism... please, tell me some good news." The prism glowed its hues of golden yellow as Hope held it with closed eyes. The tribrid was afraid to open them, scared that whoever was sitting next to her wouldn't have the answers she was looking for.
"Little witch."
Hope's shoulders tensed immensely at the nickname she had gotten so used to hearing. The nickname she may never hear again.
"You know, Hope Mikaelson, it was an awful thing to find out the love of my life was lying to me about something so... drastic."
Hope opened her eyes with caution, eyeing the projected male next to her. His face looked as he did the last time she saw him.
His slim face and sharp jaw stared back at her. His cheekbones bounced with light from the prism. The light even highlighted his eyes. Those blue eyes were so cold they looked as clear as ice.
The tribrid bit her lip as she stared back at him, knowing her sub conscience was going to tell her everything she did wrong.
"Why did you keep it from me for so long? And then to top it all off, it seems everyone knew except for me. And you made that Potter your pack."
Hope breathed out through her nose harshly, hands turning to fists.
"I didn't choose to make him pack! It just... happened..! He's a part of me. His magic is half of my own, Draco. I can't help that... but you didn't even try to understand it! Why? Why didn't you stay? You promised forever and then you left me!"
By this time, Hope had tears falling freely down her hollowed cheeks. She hadn't eaten since she locked herself in her room, and she wasn't sure she planned on eating anytime soon either.
"Hmm. That's a good question, little witch. Why didn't I stay? Why did I leave? I loved you so, right? So why did I abandon you?"
Hope couldn't think clearly, and her mind was making her rethink everything now. Why did he leave her? There must be some reason, right? What if he left the bracelet on purpose? What if he wanted her to find it?
She shut her eyes tightly, tears springing from the sides of her eyes. Her hands shook, the prism close to falling from her lap. "I want to know why. Why Draco? Why did you leave me?" The prism Draco shrugged, because as much as he looked like Draco, and sounded like Draco, it wasn't him.
"It's possible it has nothing to do with you. Or, it has everything to do with you. I could be protecting you, you know? It could be for your own good."
Hope shook her head, "That should be my choice to make. Not yours! Ugh! Draco... I wish I could ask him himself. I wish he would come back, or give me a sign. He was opening up to me. So why... why did he just... leave?"
The prism Draco sat beside the tribrid and watched her, eyeing her. She wished it were really him. If only he would come back. The prism dulled as Hope place it on her bedside table, the image of Draco disappearing into the air.
Hope knew that she couldn't keep doing this. How many times now, had she lost someone dear to her? Someone she loved so much torn away from her? But this time, the person hasn't torn away from her... he left. On his own.
Hope sighed heavily, blinking away the tears that dared to fall down her face. She stood up, almost falling from how dizzy she actually was, and snapped her fingers. Workout clothes appeared on her body.
She knew she need to get out. She needed an outlet for her pain. Since the classroom was no longer of use she chose to go for a run in the enchanted forest. She remembers the way to the Thestrals, so she shifted onto her wolf once she got to the edge of the forest and let the scents in the air guide her there.
Hope appeared in the clearing she had walked with Harry and Luna some time ago in her wolf form. Her white fur brushed past the trees as she ran through them, zig-zagging until she stopped in front of what seemed to be the Thestral that had seemed to like her before.
Hope stopped a foot in front of it, its sunken in sockets looking back at her with a tilted head. Hope snuffed at it, slowly walking toward it until her nose nuzzled it gently.
The Thestral nuzzled her back, and turned to run, wanting her to follow it. She yipped and ran after it playfully for what seemed to be hours. It was only when they came to an edge of the forest that Hope saw it was getting dark out. She wondered what would happen should she stay out past the curfew.
Would monsters come and get her? Or would they simply let her be because she too, was a monster?
Hope decided to test it out as she transformed back into her human form and took a seat on the cliff. She pulled her knees to her chest and laid her chin on top of them softly. Letting out a huff of air she looked out into the distance, nothing but fields clouding her vision.
She could feel the Thestral nudging her arm until she brought down one of her legs and watched as it took a seat on top of it. Its wings curled into her as if to give her a hug, which made her heart flutter with the little emotion she let stay inside her. She pet it gently, her chin still resting on top of the knee pressed against her chest.
"I really should get back inside, right? But... it's so peaceful here. Alone. Without anything to remind me of... Well, you get it. Don't you? You know, maybe I should give you a name? How about... Ombre? I like that... Ombre..."
Hope watched as the sun set over the edge of the fields below the forest, hand petting Ombre's leathery wings.
For days she sat there on the edge of the cliff looking out. The tribrid watched as the sun rose in the sky and set behind the trees for four days. She didn't eat much but berries which Ombre somehow found and brought to her. She drank the water she found in the large leaves from one of the trees, and for some reason doing these things kept her at peace.
It was only when she heard the train horn in the distance that she realized it was time for her to leave Ombre and return to Hogwarts. With a heavy sigh, she blinked down at Ombre with an apologizing smile. "Sorry, Ombre. But it seems like it's time for me to head on back. I promise to come to visit." Ombre nodded as it pulled out of her lap and flew up into the air, surprising Hope. The tribrid smiled widely and clapped for Ombre.
The two walked to the edge of the forest that led back to the school and stopped just when the gravel path to the school came into view.
Hope bent down and pet Ombre once more, promising to come back, and then walked out of the enchanted forest and snapped her fingers, appearing back in her dorm where she hurried to shower and change into fresh clothes.
Just as Hope was walking out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her body and another being squeezed onto her hair to draw out the water, the door opened, and in stepped Hope's friend. Dare she say, one of her best friends.
Hermione.
A/N
Heys guys! Long time no see! I finally finished a chapter! Not sure when I'll have a new one but I've been very much in the mood for writing lately so hopefully I can make the time to write and post!
Hope you all like this chapter! It's giving very 🎶There's a possibilityyyyy🎶
Don't forget to vote, comment, and give me a follow!!
💖💛💙
!!May contain spoilers to Legacies below!!
ALSO! WHOS BEEN KEEPING UP WITH LEGACIES BC OMGGGGG HOPE IS SO FUCKING HAWTTTTTT😍😍😍 SHE COULD DRINK MY BLOOD ANY DAYYYY