"if we make if through december ... everything's gonna be alright, I know." ~ Phoebe Bridgers
~december 1971~ (christmas special part 1 of 5)
REMUS
For days after Remus got back to the school, he had to field questions from both the boys and the girls in his year about where he'd been, but he managed to get past them with a handful of carefully constructed excuses and a healthy amount of lies. He felt guilty leading his new friends on like this with the full knowledge that there was a good chance he wouldn't be able to complete his time at Hogwarts, but it was necessary. Not only this, but the thought of people seeing him as normal for once was just too tempting. He couldn't shove Sirius and James and Peter away. They were always nice to him. They didn't ask complicated questions and expect an answer. He'd even been surprised that when he got home from his latest transformation, both the boys and the girls had shown concern, but none of them tried to force any direct answer out of him. He knew it couldn't last, though. He could never tell them what was really wrong, and so someday they'd all leave him. It was only a matter of time.
The day before the start of the Christmas holiday, Remus awoke to an empty boys dormitory. He sat up on one elbow and looked around, taking in the disastrous mess around him. Every bed was unmade, even the ones that didn't actually belong to anyone, and the floor was so littered with clothes and books and parchment that you couldn't actually see the wood at all. His eyes flicked up to the window, through which bright, icy light was streaming, and he squinted to see if the snowstorm of that week had gotten any worse. To his delight, it had. Remus hated being cold more than anything, but he loved the way snow looked. He laid back on his pillows and pulled the mountain of blankets covering him up to his chin, just watching the white flakes float down to the windowsill and slowly build up over the pane.
At that moment, the door crashed open and Sirius and James bounded through, Peter close behind. "Aren't you up yet?" James said, leaping onto the end of Remus's bed. "Classes are all cancelled because of the snow. We've got the day off!"
"Come on, get up," said Sirius, stealing one of Remus's pillows and crashing onto the bed next to him. "You've been asleep so long, we thought you might've disappeared again."
Remus looked over at him in alarm, but Sirius only winked. The guilty feeling in his chest never went away, though. He pulled himself up and checked the clock. "Guys," he groaned, falling back onto the pillows. "It's seven in the morning."
"Exactly," said Sirius. "You got a whole eight hours of sleep, now come on."
Remus started to protest, but stopped as soon as he saw what little good it would do. He allowed James and Sirius to pull him out of bed, and grabbed the warmest sweater he could find in his trunk. When he looked up again, he saw that all three boys were waiting patiently for him by the door and felt a little pang in his gut. He didn't know why they always did that. They always acted as though they really wanted Remus to be with them, when he knew he couldn't be all that important. "Alright, I'm coming," he murmured, pulling on a pair of woolen socks before following the boys down to the common room.
The common room was mostly empty, as Remus would expect it to be on a snowy morning in which classes had been cancelled. He figured most people were probably taking it as an opportunity to sleep in; it was what he would've done, anyways. Peter was sitting on the floor in front of the fire place, an untouched game of chess in front of him. As Remus neared his usual armchair right next to the fire, Peter looked up at him in excitement. "Do you want to play chess with me?" he asked, his eyes lit up.
Remus shifted on his feet, and then he noticed the small girl curled up in the corner of the couch. Seeing Artemis always made Remus happy. He liked the way her hair sometimes fell in wild curls and sometimes in perfectly straightened wisps depending on the way she was feeling. He liked the way she always had a book as well as a notebook on her, and was constantly writing in the margins or on top of her own writing in the notebook. She was the sort of person who never willingly gave up too much information on herself, which made Remus always want to ask her about a million questions. He held back for fear of annoying her, but every time she spoke he listened closely, enraptured by her words.
That morning, she was wearing an enormous gray sweater that seemed to fit more like a blanket that anything. Remus knew 'oversized' clothes were in style, but the way Artemis wore them seemed a bit excessive. Everything in her wardrobed seemed more fit for a grown man than an eleven year old girl. "No thanks, Peter," Remus said, and then, to Artemis, "Hey," he sat down in his armchair as James, Sirius, and Peter migrated to the other side of the common room to see something Frank Longbottom had in a large box. "What're you reading?"
Artemis put the book down and gave him a small smile. "War and Peace." When Remus raised an eyebrow skeptically, her face broke into a real smile and a small laugh escaped her lips. "I know, I know. And honestly, I don't understand a word it's saying. It's- ahhh- it's my dad's copy. He wrote a bunch of funny things in the margins- well-" she cut herself off, "-It doesn't really matter. The language is really pretty. What've you been reading lately?"
Remus looked at her curiously. He'd noticed in the last three months he'd known Artemis, that she sometimes referred to her father in the past tense, and other times in the present. He didn't know what to make of it. "Finished On the Road, by Kerouac last week. Got any suggestions?"
"The Firm, by Grisham. You'd love it."
Remus noticed that Artemis's voice had turned sort of dull and her face had fallen back down to the pages of her book. It wasn't like her to not get super excited about giving someone a book recommendation. He squinted at her for a second, and then pulled the chocolate bar his mother had sent him in a care package the week before out of his pocket. It was his last one, but he figured he could get more when he went home for Christmas. "Here," he said gently, handing her the little square of chocolate.
When she looked up, Artemis's expression softened and she moved to the other side of the couch to get closer to Remus. She took the chocolate and unwrapped it, looking immediately happier. She broke off a square and handed it to Remus, then took one for herself. Remus watched all of this in wonder, happy that for once he'd been able to give something back to one of his friends.
JAMES
James didn't understand why the others weren't as excited as he was for the holidays. Even Sirius, who James could always pull out of his shell, seemed tense and on-edge the whole time they looked down at the boxes of decorations Frank Longbottom had found in a closet near Gryffindor tower. "You guys can put them up," Frank said, standing and dusting himself off. "McKinnon's still holding practice this afternoon, so I've got to go get ready."
Frank marched off to the boys' dormitories while James surveyed the common room, planning out where to put each decoration. "Here, help me put this tinsel up on the mantle," he said to Sirius, grabbing the green strand first from the box. They went over to the fireplace and both struggled to reach high enough to get the tinsel where they wanted it. "Come on, Loopy," James called over his shoulder to Remus, who looked up mildly and then went back to his quiet conversation with Artemis. James looked behind him, and then remembered that both of them had been acting strange around the holidays as well. Artemis had gone all quiet, even around the girls, and Remus had been sleeping more than usual. James stepped down from the fireplace and went to sit on the arm of Remus's chair. "You two can talk about books all you want over the holiday, come help me decorate. It'll be fun."
"Yeah," Sirius said sarcastically. He was still standing in front of the fireplace holding the tinsel helplessly in his hands. "This is really fun."
"Shut up, Sirius," said James. He looked at Artemis, expecting her to echo him just to spite Sirius, but she only looked back down at her book in silence. He looked hopelessly back at Sirius, who merely shrugged.
"Come on, Art," Sirius said, trying halfheartedly to help James out. "There's- ah- lights in the box. You could probably charm them to light up different colors."
"Ooooh," Marlene crooned, jumping down the last two steps from the girls' dormitory to join Sirius by the fireplace. "I just figured out the color-changing charm, so I can do that." Sirius nodded to her and levitated the lights out of the box, his face growing into a smile as he wrapped the lights around Marlene. "Stop it!" she cried, trying not to laugh.
James grinned at the two of them and waved his own wand, making the pile of mistletoe at the bottom of the box fly out and hover above the heads of Sirius and Marlene. "James!" Sirius yelped, his voice cracking as he leapt away from Marlene. This finally got a laugh out of Artemis, and James grinned over at her, satisfied that he'd cheered her up at least a little. Marlene untangled herself from the lights and scowled at James, stalking off to put them up on the other side of the common room.
James shrugged and stood up, ruffling Remus's hair on his way to Sirius. "Come on, then. If none of you want to help me decorate, we should find something fun to do."
"Yeah, please." Sirius dropped the tinsel and jumped off of the threshold of the fire. "You lot coming?"
Artemis didn't even look up at him, even though the question was directed at her as well as Remus and Peter. "Nah," Remus said after giving Artemis a long look. "We'll catch up with you later."
"Pete?" James asked.
Peter jumped and looked up at James, not used to being directly included in plans. "Ummm, actually I was wondering if anybody wanted to play chess with me?"
"See you later, then," James said, his mouth twitching into an amused smile as he followed Sirius to the portrait hole.
The first person the boys found in the drafty and mostly empty hallways was Narcissa Black. She was walking slowly down the corridor towards them, her uniform messed up and her hair sticking out at odd angles. "Someone partied a bit too hard last night," Sirius muttered, and he and James snickered.
"Easy bait," James murmured, pulling his wand out of his robes. "Hey- hey, you!"
"Wait-" Sirius said quickly, grabbing James's arm. "She's- ah-"
"Oh, right," said James, his eyes widening. "She's your cousin." He always forgot Sirius was part of a Slytherin pureblood family. As far as James was concerned, Sirius was just his best friend, as much a part of Gryffindor house as he was. Sirius never talked about his family, and James never pressured him. He figured Christmases in the Black house were probably pretty different from the ones in the Potter house, so he wanted to make Sirius's time before he had to go home good enough to make up for it.
Sirius frowned at Narcissa, who hadn't seemed to notice the boys yet, and then something in his demeanor changed. "Only means we can hit harder. And besides, she's easy bait," he said, drawing his own wand. "Hey, Narcissa!" he shouted with a troublesome smile. "Out a bit too late last night, huh?"
Narcissa turned and squinted at them, her pale blue eyes ringed with dark black. "Shut up, Sirius, or I swear to Merlin..." she muttered, barely intelligable.
"What was that?" James asked in a falsely sweet voice. "Couldn't hear you over the- sweet merlin! How much did you have to drink last night?"
Narcissa scowled at them. "Sirius, get your stupid little friend out of here before I-"
"Before you what?" Sirius taunted. "D'you even know any magic? I mean, my mum said you've been failing all your classes since your first year... what a disgrace." James looked back and forth between Sirius and Narcissa, feeling the growing tension. He almost had Sirius stop for fear of going too far, but he kept going. "Does Auntie Druella know that you aren't even trying to keep your grades up? And that you go out and party pretty much every night, because-"
"You don't have any leverage anymore," Narcissa sneered, pulling out her own wand and pointing it at Sirius's chest. He took a step back instinctively. "You're the disgrace in the family now. I can't wait until Auntie Walburga gets her hands on you... You'll-"
"Petrificus-"
"Expelliarmus!" Both Sirius and Narcissa's wands flew from their hands as footsteps echoed down the hall towards them. Andromeda Black and Dorcas Meadowes jogged over, both of their wands held aloft. "Honestly," Andromeda said, her tone exasperated. "Sirius, how many times am I going to have to catch you fighting-"
"She said-" Sirius started, but Dorcas cut him off.
"You're going to lose us all our points, Black," she said in a disappointed tone. "How many times do I have to tell you two to stop causing trouble?"
As Dorcas scolded the boys, Andromeda turned to Narcissa. "How late were you out last night? You're a mess. And seriously, you can't try to fight a bunch of eleven year olds, even if Sirius is our cousin."
Narcissa shrugged her sister off and started down the corridor again. Adromeda gave the Gryffindors a short wave before hurrying after her sister.
James and Sirius exchanged a mischevous smile, which was cut off by Dorcas's shrill voice. She was only a year older than them, but one cross look from her could keep them out of trouble for hours. Dorcas was widely and unofficially known as the mother of Gryffindor tower, at least to the younger students. "Come on, you two," she sighed, grabbing them each by the arm and dragging them back in the way they came. "Just- stay in the common room, alright? I don't feel like chasing after you all the time."
"What were you doing with Andromeda, anyways?" Sirius asked curiously.
A small smile crossed Dorcas's face, but she fought it down quickly. "Just hanging out with some of her friends."
"Slytherins?" James asked, aghast.
"No, idiot," said Dorcas. "My cousin's in Hufflepuff. Ted Tonks, I doubt you two would know him. But-"
"Wait, so Andromeda was hanging out with Hufflepuffs?" Sirius looked more confused than ever at this, and James, for once, understood why. He knew that for families like Sirius's, it was rare for any of them to stray outside the realm of Slytherin. He couldn't help feeling confused, albeit grateful, at how quickly Sirius had strayed from Slytherin to become friends with him and the rest of the Gryffindor boys.
ARTEMIS
Artemis missed her father. She couldn't help thinking about all of the Christmases she'd spent with him and the way he would hold her up to put a star at the top of their Christmas tree in the little house in Yorkshire. Remus's company and Marlene's occasional conversation helped keep her out of her daze a little, but every time the two of them fell silent, she went back to thinking about her dad. She kept looking down at the pages of War and Peace and found herself reading the same few sentences over and over and over, never getting anywhere. The chocolate from Remus had helped a little, but by the time James climbed back through the portrait hole with Dorcas Meadowes at his heels, she was back to feeling hopelessly sad over the empty feeling she got when she thought about her dad.
She didn't even notice James getting back until he was standing right next to her, peering over her shoulder at the page of War and Peace she kept staring at. "I like that note," he said, pointing at one of Andrew's annotations and making Artemis jump a mile. "Merlin, calm down," James said, sitting down next to her. "Come on, you've been no fun today."
Artemis glared at him, but found herself unable to get too mad at the large puppy-dog eyes and infectious smile of James Potter. "Fine then, what do you constitute as fun?" she said, her voice more quiet than usual.
James frowned at her for a minute, exchanging a curious look with Remus. They both shrugged and James went back to looking at the book in Artemis's hands. "Come outside and have a snowball fight. You should see how deep it is out there."
"I hate the cold," said Artemis.
"Me too!" Remus said, getting far too excited over having something in common with her.
James looked unimpressed. "Well, you should come out too, then. Come on, it'll be fun."
"Nope," Remus said resolutely.
On the floor in front of the fire, Peter looked up hopefully. "You could play chess with me, Art. It'll be fun too, I promise."
Artemis looked back and forth between Peter and James, who raised his eyebrows pointedly. "Fine," she sighed, closing her book and setting it on the table next to the couch. "Let me get my coat."
Somehow, Artemis felt her spirits lift as she walked the halls with James Potter, listening to him chatter on and on about how excited he was for Christmas. Artemis was used to the version of James the girls were always complaining about; the arrogant bully who couldn't take anything seriously. She knew he was like that sometimes, but when it was just the two of them he was actually nice. "What do you do for Christmas?" James asked finally as they reached the large oak front doors.
Artemis shrugged. "The normal stuff, I guess." She didn't elaborate. She didn't feel like getting into the details of how her parents used to sing corny Christmas carols together by the fire and how her dad would hand-make his own Christmas decorations, putting his own artistic twist on each one.
"Huh," said James. "The normal stuff is good. Here, look at how deep the snow is." His face split into a toothy smile as he stepped into the snow and quickly sank to almost his waist. Artemis stumbled after him, unable to keep from smiling at how excited he got at the wintry weather.
All of a sudden, a snowball caught Artemis square in the face. "Gotcha!" Sirius shouted from a few feet away, where he'd obviously been lying in wait for James to bring him a victim. "Ha!"
"You- planned- this-" Artemis struggled to wipe her face off as it stung with cold.
James shrugged and grinned at her. "Sorry. The opportunity was too good to pass up."
"It was between you and Mary, and we knew Mary would cry," Sirius said with a short laugh, but his smile faded when Artemis didn't remove her hands from her face. Her shoulders trembled slightly under her huge winter coat and Sirius and James exchanged a suddenly panicked look. "Oh- don't cry-" Sirius said, wading through the snow towards Artemis. "It's just snow-" He reached her shoulder, but didn't know what to do from there.
Just then, Artemis's face popped out of her hands and she shoved Sirius hard in the shoulders, making him fall back into the deep snow. She let out a triumphant laugh. "Gotcha!" Her face was red, but nowhere close to tears. She started shaping a snowball in her hands to aim at James's shocked face as Sirius struggled out of the snow drift. "Come on," she said testily, "It's war."