I chuckled as I took a step down the edge of the windowsill. "I've done a lot of insane things in my life, but I have to say, this one definitely takes the cake."
Teetering at the edges of the elaborate rooftops, I dexterously maneuvered and parkoured my way downwards the humongous castle.
'No big deal.' I gulped. 'We've done this plenty of times before! What's the difference of five hundred meters?'
I looked down at the castle grounds below. The people are so far they look like ants. I rubbed my eyes. Apparently, the difference was a lot.
I grasped a statue of a golden dragon to prevent my dizzying self from falling. I was initially worried that this body would not follow me through, but so far, it has always obeyed everything I did. Even as I face the threat of death by falling, the body screams the sentence 'This is fine,' urging me to finish what I started.
But the best part about it is how light and good it feels. 'Ah, what a joy to finally be relieved from the pain.' I internally sobbed as I held my lower back. 'Seriously, fuck school.'
I looked at one of the body's pretty hands. It was wounded and stained by its own blood from my tantrum, but it's still so powerful. I could barely feel the pain from it. I clenched it tight and got back to climbing down.
"Your Majesty?!" A shocked maid who was passing by a corridor instantly spotted me when I jumped down another roof.
"Your Majesty..." I repeated what she said. The voice was deep and melodious.
It feels surreal. To think that I'd actually transmigrate to an unknown world similar to the novels Yumi used to shove into my face. And it seems I hit the jackpot with the way how that servant addresses me. Why am I a man though...? I admit I'm a bit tomboyish but this is just too much.
I felt the body's abdomen. Well at least I can definitively guess that His Majesty for one, is hot. Well maybe. I haven't seen this body's face in the mirror yet. He could still be a butter face. LOL.
I brought my finger to my lips to quiet the maid. If I'm her master, then she should know when to keep her mouth shut.
The maid frantically bowed down in understanding and hurriedly left the scene.
That was bad. I covered myself with the white and golden-embroidered shawl I took with me. It's still very eye-catching, but it was the least sparkly among everything else in the room. It came from the set of robes I've been wearing since I woke up. So it won't be a hindrance, I took them off and wore the least attention-seeking shirt and pants I found as well. I say that, but it's also because I didn't know how to wear the other fancy-looking clothes inside the closet.
"Now then." I scoured my surroundings and spotted the high castle walls. "Once I get down, how am I going to pass through that?"
"Halt. What do you have there?"
"Ah, this is..." I felt the wagon stop at the castle's back gate by the imperial guards. 'Come on, mister coach man! Show them your powers of bullshitry!'
I clasped my hands and sincerely rooted for him from the inside of my barrel. 'Come on! Remember the deal we had earlier!'
"Is that the fresh batch of apples?"
"Yes sir." The coachman got down from his wagon and bowed towards the stable master. The stable master pulled aside the wagon's curtain and confirmed the contents.
"Good. Leave them in there and you may leave." He pointed towards a warehouse and left. Creeping carefully, I stealthily went down from my hiding spot and followed the coachman inside.
"Whew, that's everything." The coachman wiped his forehead from all the sweat. "It's just a small order, but it's still heavy." He took the water bag from his belt and started drinking.
"Yo." I tapped his shoulder.
"Ugh! Spltt..." I was surprised when he was startled and started coughing. I immediately hit his back to stop him from choking. "T-thank you."
"You okay?" I asked.
"Yes, I'm oka—"He turned around. His eyes became wide as saucers and suddenly dropped to his knees. "Y-your Majesty! Please spare me!"
"What are you doing? Get up." I raised my brow.
"Yes Your Majesty."He slowly got back up but still continued to lower his head in fear.
Huh. I can understand the servant from earlier, but even this coachman recognized who this body is. With the humongous scale of the castle, I imagined that a monarch like this one would be too far away from the sight of commoners. Could it be the clothes? I looked down at the coachman. He's way shorter. I tower everyone. Must be this or everything else combined.
Our eyes met. He instantly looked down. He's still scared. Well, I can't really blame him. The guy in front of him is someone who can simply kill him on a whim. I observed his trembling form. In some way, it's kind of cute...
I smirked. "Do you really want me to spare you?" You did nothing bad but whatever.
He gasped. He shook his head up and down vigorously. Did he finally become mute from fear? I take that as a yes though.
"Then as Your Majesty, do everything I say."
"Yes Your Majesty! I'll do everything you say!"
"Good. Start dancing then."
"Hmm?! A-alright. I mean if you say so Your Majesty!" He started swinging his arms awkwardly in the air.
"What a pitiful form. You can't properly dance with such lackluster energy, you know." I disappointingly said.
"I'm sorry Your Majesty!" 'Please don't kill me.' I heard him mutter.
I clapped my hands to a festive rhythm. "I'll give you some music, so put your back into it."
He swung his arms harder. I held back my laughter. What fun. It got boring instantly though. He only knows three moves.
"That's enough. I was just teasing you." I held down his shoulders. He blushed in overwhelm. "The truth is I came here for a different reason. If you still haven't figured it out, I'm trying to sneak out and I nee—no, you will help me."
I have to be assertive. I'm posing as this man's ruler now.
I walked past him and grabbed a large barrel filled with water. I was prepared to feel its weight, but to my surprise, I managed to lift it easily. Before I could fully process what happened, my mind was snapped back at the sound of his voice.
"Help?" He sounded unsure of what he just heard.
I held the barrel over one arm and cleared my throat. "Correct."
I took off the lid of the barrel and began pouring the water in the warehouse's stored water troughs.
The coachman was mesmerized at my display of strength but quickly jolted back to reality. "Oh I'll do that for you Your Majesty." He panicked at the sight of me doing dirty work.
"Can you carry this?" I brought the barrel to his face.
"No..."
"Then stay back." I snapped at him.
"Yes Your Majesty..." He stepped aside looking like he was rejected. I muffled my laughter. So cute. I secretly licked my lips as I continued doing what I was doing.
"Um, Your Majesty. If I may be so rude to ask..."
"Speak."
"May I know why you're doing that?" He looked at the barrel.
"I can't simply parade myself inside your wagon, can I?" I went towards the wagon with the empty barrel in tow. I peered over my surroundings. Good. They're still way too busy over that jousting event. The coachman frantically followed me outside.
"I'm trying to sneak out. How can I do that without hiding?" I continued my explanation as I placed the barrel inside. I sat down at the edge of the wagon. "Now listen. I'm going to the church. Can you take me there?"
"You mean the cathedral, Your Majesty? I know how to get there, but..."
"Is something wrong?" I crossed my arms. "Spit it out."
"Ah, nothing!" He waved his hands in denial.
I firmly set my hand on his shoulder. "We have a deal then. I'll leave it to you to get me out of here secretly. After all, you wish to be spared right?" I smiled at him.
The look on his eyes feels like he's seen a devil. He hung his head low. "Yes Your Majesty. I will not disappoint you."
Sorry mister coachman. Don't worry. I never planned to kill you at all.
"Good. Then let's get going, shall we?" I entered the wagon and positioned myself inside the barrel. Ugh. It's tighter than I imagined. Plus, it's moist...
'Is it really a deal or more of a threat though?' I mulled over.
"Eclise. You're the coachman with the apples earlier, right?" The captain of the gate's guards stepped forward and handed the coachman his name tag.
So mister coachman's name is Eclise. I peeked at the scene outside through the small hole of my barrel and narrow gap of the wagon's curtain. Dang. This body truly has it all. Even the perfect 20/20 vision I've missed so much from my teenage years.
"Yes sir, that's me." Eclise smiled.
"I see. Have you finished delivering all of it then?"
"Yes sir!"
"Oh ho. Then why is it..." He held his spear to move the curtain and look at the barrel. "That your wagon still has something in it then? Plus the apples were inside crates, but you have a barrel inside."
"Do you mean the barrel, sir?" Eclise scratched his head in awkwardness. "Actually, the barrel's water sir. It's mine, but I just happened to bring it along with the apples earlier."
What a lame excuse, but keep at it mister coachman! I gave him a thumb up inside the barrel.
"Oh is that so? I don't remember you bringing it along earlier though." The captain looked at Eclise while rubbing his beard in suspicion.
Nosey guard. I chewed the shawl to ease my nervousness. Can't you please just let us go?
"The inside of the wagon is quite dark. You must've missed it earlier." Eclise continued to bullshit his way through.
"The barrel's really big though. Are you sure I really missed it?" The captain cocked his head sideways. Ugh... He's having way too much fun with this.
"Oh well, I can't fault you for my own mistake." He shrugged. "I guess I should let you pass."
Eclise's eyes brightened.
I sucked in my breath. No Eclise! This is...
The captain smirked. "But protocol states that I should inspect every single thing that enters and exits the imperial palace, so it should be fine if I check the barrel inside then?"
"Y-you can't!" Eclise gasped and immediately covered his mouth.
"Why not? It's not like it's alcohol that will spoil when we open it, right? You said it yourself, it's just water. So what's the problem?" The captain warmly smiled.
Ack. I knew it! My sudden shuffling caused me to accidentally hit the inner wall of the barrel loudly. The captain grinned. Like a devil, he started to march towards the wagon with a hellish aura.
"No!" Eclise got down from his seat and tried to stop the captain. The other guards raised their spears against him to bar him away.
"And here I thought that we had a little thievery going on here. Turns out, it was a little escapade. I knew that barrel was familiar. I wonder which knight is it this time." The captain's eyes glinted.
'The knights used this barrel to sneak out all the time?!' Fuck! Just my luck. What am I going to do?
"I bet ten silvers Sir Gawain is inside there," laughed one of the guards as the captain crawled into the wagon.
"Fifteen silvers it's Sir Ramone instead." The captain laughed with the others as he lifted the barrels lid. "With the way how this barrel is swaying, it's got to be him..."
"'Sup?" I nonchalantly said as our eyes met.
Silent tension permeated inside the dark room of the wagon as we continued to stare at each other. He finally broke it by putting the lid back where it belongs and promptly got out.
"It was water." He resolutely told his subordinates.
"But didn't the barrel move, captain?" protested one.
He slapped the guy across the cheek. "It. Was. Water."
"Let them pass!" He shouted.
And that was how Eclise and I got out of the castle. With an entire squad of imperial guards looking at us in confusion while one of them cried in pain.
"Theodore."
"Yes captain?" Theodore held his sore cheek.
"Do you know a decent lawyer?"
"W-why sir?! What are you planning to do?"
"I dunno. I just thought that now would be a good time to make my last will and testament."
"Captain?!"