May
Sunday
We finally arrived in Braamfontein, it was passing 9. She didn't stay, she just dropped me and drove back. I took a lift to my floor, just thanking God I'm back. While walking toward my room, I came across Hazel, who was with a guy I didn't know. It must be the boyfriend.
"Hey, are you just coming back?" she asked, as she stopped. Her boyfriend staring at me with no shame.
"Yah I just got here," I said, trying to dodge the guy's eyes.
"How was it? Okay, don't answer that, I will come by after I walk Thando. Oh, by the way, this is Thando, my boyfriend," she said, and I finally looked at him. "Thando, this is Tshedza, my best friend," she finished, I didn't know we were best friends.
"Hi," I said to Thando, who slightly walked to me and hugged me.
"Nice to meet you," he said, after hugging me and I just nodded, smiling, while Hazel winked at me.
"Okay, I will come by later," she said, and I waved at her, going toward my room. I entered my room and threw myself in bed.
What a terrible weekend I just had. I took off my clothes and got under the sheets, time to sleep. I guess I didn't have much sleep last night because of the problems I created. I just hope the 'later' Hazel is talking about is the one where she will find me sleeping, I don't want to see her today, I just need to rest.
I woke up in the afternoon, I realised it was my phone which woke me.
"Sihle," I said to the call.
"Are you back yet from your sister's?" he asked.
"Yes, I'm back. You?"
"I just got here. Should I come by your room? I miss you."
"Okay, you can come," I said, and he was on his way.
I woke up and make up my bed which was already messed up. I thought of my sister and what she might be going through right now. I should call her now, I thought to myself. I tried calling her, but she wasn't picking up her phone, so I just sent her a message that I hope everything goes well.
Sihle knocked at my door in a few minutes. When I opened the door, he couldn't wait for me to say hi, he pulled me to his small body and kissed me passionately.
"I missed you so much," he said, while he enters, and I closed the door behind us.
"I did miss you too babe," I said as I try to catch up on his happy mood. I wonder why he is thrilled, this is not because he is seeing me, there is something behind this. "Why are you so happy, is like you not from the funeral?" I asked, joining him on the bed.
"I'm just happy to see you," he said, and I just nodded, hugging him one more time.
We lay down in bed while he explained to me how his weekend was, how the funeral went, and how everyone is at home. I told him my weekend was okay, I didn't have the energy to explain what I did at my sister's, so I lied. I'm thinking of keeping it as a secret to everyone, I can't go around explaining myself how I didn't do it deliberately.
Sihle told me that the postpone he did at the hotel worked so we will go this coming weekend. It's getting creepier than romantic to have to go through all this just to have sex. Is it even worth it to do it at the hotel? I mean, is not like we are married, we can do it here, right now and nothing will change, it will just be sex.
Maybe I am the crazy one, possibly I am feeling this because I have nothing to lose, I mean I have already lost it to Karabo. Speaking of which, I haven't thought of Karabo this whole weekend, I guess Henson occupy my whole mind when I'm with him. But with Sihle is different, I can think of Karabo while I'm with him. I guess the sex between Karabo and I plays a significant role in this.
We continued lying in bed while we talk about our little love chats, trying to duck each other's sensitive parts. He doesn't even touch me at the right places when we kiss, but it's a good thing coz if he did, I wouldn't be able to hold myself, I was in a huge hunger.
This is all Karabo's fault. You don't give someone a taste of food and then leave them. Now I'm stuck with my boyfriend who just thinks I'm still a little virgin and can't even touch me because of that.
"Are you falling asleep?" he asked as we were both quiet for a moment.
"Nope. Just enjoying lying here, in the quiet,"
"Yeah. Me too," he said, squeezing my upper arm. Damn, out of everything, that's all he can squeeze.
As predictable, we fell asleep and woke up at around 5 in the evening. As for me, I am not sleeping tonight, I mean I have already slept the whole day today. Sihle finally left to go get ready for Monday, and I did the same.
I heard a knock at the door, it must be Hazel. I walked to the door and opened it, and there she was, smiling.
"I missed you this weekend," she said as she hugged me, and I was just nervous. I hugged her back and then closed the door while she walked toward the bed. "Were you sleeping? I came earlier, but there was no answer," she asked, already making herself at home on my bed.
"Oh, yeah, I slept. I was exhausted," I said, sitting on the chair, away from her. She was holding a juice bottle, drinking on it bit by bit.
"Are you still tired now, or can we watch a movie? I brought this movie I just got from my boyfriend, he said it's nice," she said, opening the laptop. I can watch a movie, I just don't know if she can. I had no choice, I had to join her on the bed while we start watching the flick.
Well, the movie was playing, but we were talking than watching, you know Hazel, she's a talker. I ended up testing what she was drinking, and it was a mixture of juice and vodka, so we ended up drinking it together. In a few minutes, I was already telling her what happened at my sister's.
"That's hot, I like your sister's style," she said after I have explained the story.
"How is cheating, hot?" I asked her, and we both laughed. Alcohol was already starting to take control of me, just a bit.
"Come on Tshedza, you were also cheating on Sihle when that happened, tell me it wasn't a great feeling," she said, and it was true though, the feeling of making out with Henson was good, not to mention of having sex with Karabo, those feelings were good maybe because it was wrong to do them. Or maybe this isn't me who is thinking this, I mean I've got alcohol in my system, how would cheating feel great, alcohol is in control here.
We talked, watched the movie and finished up our home-made cocktail. We were both talking and laughing at ourselves when I heard a knock. Hazel rushed to open the door, and it was Sihle. I guess the party is over.
"Hi," Sihle said to Hazel, while he looked at me surprised.
"Hi. I'm Tshedza's best friend," Hazel said, and I just walked toward the door, I guess I need to get used to being called that 'best friend'.
"This is Hazel babe, she stays here too," I said to Sihle who was just smiling at her like he wishes she disappears. He walked in while Hazel takes her juice bottle, ready to go. I said my goodbyes to her, and she left.
"She seems crazy," he said while he sat on the edge of the bed.
"Yeah she is, she's a bit drunk though," I said, trying to defend her by blaming it on alcohol.
"You are a bit drunk too," he noticed, and I was just feeling embarrassed. I joined him on the bed and sat next to him. That small amount of alcohol I just had was making me do things, I found myself trying to seduce him after we kissed. I wanted him, I couldn't wait for Saturday, so I started taking off his clothes.
"Babe stop; this is not you. You are drunk," he said, taking my hands off him.
"What if this is me. I want this babe I can't wait for Saturday anymore," I felt myself saying, thanks to the alcohol I would have never gotten the gut to say that out loud.
"I know," he said like I'm just a kid while he made me lie far from him. He played the movie that was playing, and I realise Hazel forgot her USB. It was hard being around Sihle because I wanted more, but he didn't.
He couldn't handle me so he left. After he was gone, I just did my touch-ups in any school work I had as I didn't feel sleepy. I slept at around 11 after I have done a lot.
Monday
The following day in the morning, I woke up and called my sister and she told me Katie didn't come so there was no progress yet. I waited for Sihle to go to our first lecture, Chemistry. We got there, I joined Zinzi who was already in class while Sihle joins his buddies.
"We broke up," Zinzi threw her first words at me the moment I sat down.
"What? Why?" I asked her, not understanding how it would have happened between these two love birds.
"Apparently, he has his high school girlfriend who goes to UJ," she said, and I could see she was hurting.
"How did you find out?"
"Some of his UJ friends said without realising I was listening,"
"When did you meet his friends?"
"Okay, let me explain the story," she said, and I nodded. "We were planning on having sex on Saturday right, we ended up doing it on Friday night as I have spent the night at his place."
"Pause, pause and rewind...You lost your virginity?" I asked. I didn't know. Zinzi and I didn't talk this past weekend.
"Yeah, I did."
"How was it, how was it? Spill," I asked, so excited, much more than she seems.
"It was okay. So, let me continue with the story."
"Was it that bad?"
"Well it was great until I found out he has been lying to me, it wasn't his first time, and he has a girlfriend."
"Oh, I'm sorry, babe. So, his friends?"
"Yeah, his friends came to visit him, and we were just chilling until I overheard them cheering him on having two girlfriends. I was angry, I asked him right away, and he didn't deny it, it was true. I haven't talked to him since Saturday night. He was trying to talk to me right now, but I didn't want to, so that's why these earphones are still in my ears," she said, taking off her earphones.
I looked back at Jabu, and all I could see was Brandon. Maybe he wants to explain decent things to her, but she's not letting him, just like Katie. I can't let my best friend's pride make her lose her love. I stood up and walked toward the boys. Zinzi tried to stop me, but I was already gone.
I was feeling so confident until I got there, I didn't realise Karabo was here already so when my eyes met his, I got weak and started forgetting what I was there for.
"Baby. Are you okay?" Sihle said and brought me back to life.
"Yeah, I want to talk to Jabu," I said, looking at him, while I wave my hand to others to reply their hi's. Jabu stood up, and we walked outside of the building while Zinzi was busy peeking on us.
"She told you. She's not letting me explain," he said while we stepped outside.
"You hurt her; that's why she doesn't want to listen to you, give her some time. You really have a girlfriend?" I asked him.
"Yes, I do, but since I met Zinzi, I am trying to break up with her. It's just hard so is taking way longer. I love Zinzi, that's why she needs to give me a little bit time," he said, and just by listening to his side of the story, I knew they will get back together soon.
"So, you are even attending our Chemistry now?"
"No, is just for today, I wanted to see her,"
We talked for a few minutes and then got back inside while the lecture was about to start. I sat next to Zinzi, and she looked at me, longing for news. Only pride is stopping her from seeing Jabu, but I could see she wants to talk to him too.
"The bitch is going down, he loves you," I said, and she just smiled because of the way I said it and I just laughed at myself too.
"No, I'm not breaking anyone apart,"
"Come 'on babe, we both know you don't care about her, you just want your Jabu back no matter what it takes," I said, and she just looked guilty. We both laughed.
I guess my weekend fire wasn't down yet, I broke up an engaged couple on weekend, now am pushing this Jabu and UJ girl to break up so my best friend can be happy. Well, call me a curse, but we all do such things sometimes just for our loved ones. I don't even know the girl, so why do I have to care about her. Her friends are caring for her, I should care for my friend too.
Speaking of my weekend fire, I haven't told Zinzi yet. I guess I will tell her after this, or not. I'm just scared she's gonna judge me that I hooked up with Henson again.
The class ended and as usual, we all, including Sihle's crew, head out in front of the building, hang a little before anyone goes their own way.
"Exams are near. We need to finish that assignment before the exam start," Karabo said while staring at me. Maybe he thinks we gonna do it at my place again.
"Yeah, we have to do it soon. This Saturday I guess," Jabu said, looking at Zinzi.
"Nah, Saturday won't work for us," Sihle said, hugging me from behind and everyone just looked at me. And I realise they already know, they know our Saturday plans because guys talk, so he told them.
"Good for you, buddy," the other one said, and I was just uncomfortable standing there. I caught up with Karabo's eyes, just glancing at me.
"We'll see you guys later," I said, already pulling Zinzi to leave them. I looked back, and Karabo was starring at me as we walk away.
"You got to start talking to Jabu," I said to Zinzi, trying to change the subject.
"I will when I'm ready; is just not today," she said. "Anyway, I will see you later, gotta go," She finished, and we walked our separate ways.
I stood by the lecture room's door, waiting for an appropriate time to get in and hoping to see Henson. I was busy with my phone when Karabo surprised me.
"You startled me," I said, putting my phone in my bag.
"I'm sorry. I just needed to talk to you," he said, looking straight into my eyes. And I just looked at his too.
"About what?" I asked softly, still, our eyes locked.
"You haven't done it with Sihle yet?" He asked. That didn't even take time. Karabo always finds a way to incriminate himself the moment I always think he might be a good guy.
Way to ruin a moment asshole "That is none of your business," I said to him, angrily.
"The thing is, I don't want you to, please," Too late, you ruin the moment. "I love you Tshedza. I love you and I want you all to myself. God I don't know what you did to me but I can't stop thinking about you," he poured his heart the guy. "Don't do it with Sihle, or anyone else but me, please." He finished. He thinks I'm stupid.
I didn't want to hear more of his bullshit, so I figured I can simply wait for a lecture at the lady's room.
"Bye Karabo," I said and walked to the bathrooms. I got in, and there was no one inside, so I just stood by the mirror, him on my mind. I was taking out my lipstick from my bag and when I looked up, Karabo was in my mirror. "What are you doing in here? this is the ladies room," I snapped as I turn around to face him. He walked toward me and started kissing me.
"I miss you, don't you miss me?" he asked, holding my face with both hands while we just stare at each other. I was just standing there, frozen to answer or to at least stop him from kissing me. He was just about to kiss me again when some girls walked in and screamed a bit after seeing him. He walked out of the bathroom, and I just smiled at those girls while they looked at me like a hooker.
When I walked out, some guys were laughing at him, thinking he went in the ladies because he was lost; but he was just standing there proud, grinning to himself. He saw me walking out of the bathroom and walked back to me and kissed me, right in public like he doesn't care if anyone like Sihle sees us.
"I will see you later," he said and I just nodded without knowing what to do, and then he left. I walked inside the lecture room, and I could feel all eyes were on me. I sat there, waiting for the class to start, smiling to myself.