"Know, I hurt you, and I, I'm sorry.
All I wanted was to love somebody"
- Love Somebody by Lauv
•••
Win woke up later than Bright this morning. When he was still half concious, sitting on the edge of the bed, Bright had been ready to go to work.
"Win, your breakfast is ready."
Win did not answer because he still dazed.
"Win, I'm gonna come home late at night. No need to prepare for dinner."
Win nodded. "I have an appointment with the wedding organizer 8 PM because I will have 3 meetings since 10 AM." He said weakly. "Can you imagine it? I'm demotivated."
"What are you talking about?" Bright chuckled. "I'm going."
"Phi..."
"What is it?"
"Last night, you shivered again."
It had been 3 days that Bright got a fever at night. Win always raised the temperature until and hugged the older man until he did not shiver anymore. That was why he was lack of sleep.
Win always wanted to take Bright to the hospital, but Bright was consistently looked normal and cheerful in the morning. So, Win was confused about what he had to do.
"Really? I don't remember anything," Bright said. "I just remember that you hugged me so tight."
"I'm sorry."
"I don't mind."
Win got up and came out from the bedroom to the dining room. He smiled at the meal Bright cooked for him. Simple. But always touched Win's heart since he could not do the same for Bright.
"Phi, let's visit hospital this weekend. I'm kinda worried about you. Na? Na na na na na?" Win complained. He pouted to make Bright fulfilling his request this time. For many years together, it was always Win taking care of Bright at home everytime the older man was sick. That was how hard it is to persuade him to go to hospital.
"You are worrying me too much. You are the one who is busy. You are busier since you are taking care of the reception, too." Bright pinched Win's cheek to stop him from pouting. "I wish I could help you more because the reception is about us."
Win patted Bright's arms which now were wrapping his body. "You have to say yes first for my request, Phi."
"Yes."
"Okay," Win was satisfied. "Didn't you say you're going just now? Why is Phi hugging me? I have to take a shower."
"That's right," Bright released Win. "I'm going."
"Take care and come back safely."
Bright nodded. He walked towards the door and paused for quite long time after he got a hold on the knob.
"P'Bright...?"
Bright exhaled heavily, then smiled after being called. He turned his head to Win as he opened the door and waved his hand. "See you soon."
•
"Thank you so much for meeting me at the time like this. It finished so late," Win wai at the man and woman in front of him.
Due to his schedule today, Win only had time after office hours and the wedding organizer had time at 8 PM to meet Win. Now, it was 10.30 PM and they just finished the meeting.
"It's okay, you are our client. We understand you and your husband were busy," The organizer said and excuse themselves.
Win finally could breathe freely, but then he glanced at his secretary. "Nong Lily, why are you still here? It's late. And I saw that you suddenly got up from your seat when I came out. Is something happened?"
"That-"
"You must go home na. You are a woman and it's late. Call a cab, it's safer fo-"
"That," Lily cut him off. "Please, read the latest news kha." She handed her phone over.
Bright Vachirawit was Rushed to the Hospital after Losing Consciousness in GTV Building
Win's eyes dilated. He was too shocked to react hastily. He gave back the phone, turned around, entered his room, and came out with his phone and car key. He looked calm but his heart beated fast. His footsteps stopped.
"Please, go ahead kha. I'll take care of the room."
"Thank you, Nong Lily. Go back home safely."
Without turning back, Win entered the elevator. He checked his phone and found 7 missed calls from Eed and another 10 from Uncle Kik. Win had no time to call back. He texted Uncle Kik to send him information about the hospital.
Gladly, Win arrived with no reporters around the hospital. Maybe tomorrow, he thought.
At the time he showed up at the door where Bright was, there was only Uncle Kik. Bright was sleeping.
"Uncle... I'm sorry-"
"No need. I know you also worked until late at night." Uncle Kik whispered. "It's okay, it's okay. He is sleeping now. I also told Mae Eed to go home and come back tomorrow."
"What happened, exactly?" Win also asked in lower volume.
"He was in the parking building, about to get into the car, then he fell on the floor."
"The news said he lost consciousness."
"That's not true," Uncle Kik clarified. "He fell because he felt weak. He did not eat for a whole day."
"No khrab," Win denied. "He had breakfast this morning. He cooked for us."
Uncle Kik nodded. "Mae Eed said, Bright threw up when he arrived at work. The same thing happened at lunch and dinner. So, that's why he got an Intravenous Injection administered."
"I ate the meal he cooked. Nothing is happened to me. It's not the problem, then." Win concluded. "Then wha-"
Uncle Kik could see Win's changing expression. He knew, the young man had been trying to keep his composure. Nevertheless, the moment he could not find what is wrong with his husband, his face was all scrunched up.
"You are husbands now, and the worry is bigger if something happened to one of you. But..." Uncle Kik put his arm around Win's shoulder. "...his blood was examined and the Doctor will inform us this morning. You can have some rest."
"P'Bright got fever at night since three days ago, he did not even aware. He shivered. He agreed to go to hospital with me this weekend," Win mumbled. "He could not wait until that time..."
Uncle Kik grinned awkwardly. He started counting how many attempts had been made to ease Win. "You can't control something like that. Gosh. You've become this stressful because of this? Your P'Bright will be fine soon."
Knowing Win finally had nothing to say, Uncle Kik led him to sit on the sofa bed beside Bright's bed so he could watch Bright as he pleases.
"I'm sleepy..." Again, Win mumbled. His eyes were on Bright, but he talked completely about himself.
Uncle Kik stepped back. He wondered if this situation caused a big shock on Win. I don't think he would react like this, he thought. He personally was able to think clearly when doctor explained. "What happened to Bright is not that bad, Win. He was immediately taken to the hos-"
"Uncle," Win interrupted. "He should have been taken here 3 days ago."
Uncle Kik had no choice but nodding to the statement. Not that he agreed with it, but Uncle Kik came to realize about the difficulties of convincing Win regarding this matter.
"Let's wait until he wake up and you both can talk na," Uncle Kik gave up. "I will talk to the wall."
•
Win did not know exactly when he fell asleep that night. In the morning, he woke up because Eed came.
Although the young man looked miserable, Eed said nothing. It was not the first time she saw Win being all stressed out about things related to Bright. For years, she witnessed how Win could be sadder, more stressful, and more in pain when something happened to Bright.
"P'Eed, sawasdee khrab."
Eed had not answered him yet, but the young man already changed his focus on Bright who was sleeping.
"P'Bright has not woken up yet khrab?"
"He woke up when you were sleeping. He knew you are here," Uncle Kik replied. "And he was mad."
"Mad khrab?"
"Umm," Uncle Kik confirmed. "Because you has not changed your clothes yet. Youu should had gone home and slept, came again tomorrow, he said."
Win clicked his tongue. How stupid you can be at the time like this? You really think I can sleep well at home knowing you are sick like this? Win wished his gaze would send his vexation to Bright.
"That's why I bring you changes of clothes," Eed added. "They're Bright's." Eed gave Win a bag contained few pieces of clothes.
Win checked the clothes and his face started to look vivid. Those clothes were Win's. They had not been seen at condo for months, years, Win did not even remember it anymore. He thought, he left them at his parents' house.
"That bag of clothes is always with him but he had never wore them," Eed explained. "Well, the clothes are his favorite, I think, because he brought them everywhere, especially when we had to go out of town. Still, he never wore them."
Win nodded several times, amazed with the new fact he found out today. "They are mine, P'Eed. Thank you for bringing them back to me."
"Huh?"
"Yours?" Uncle Kik was confused, too.
"I will get my other clothes later for him to keep."
"Oh," Eed understood.
Win went to the bathroom, take a bath and changed his clothes. He finished at the same time with Doctor and nurses came to check on Bright. "Doc..."
The Doctor paused for a second. Yesterday, he only met with Uncle Kik and Eed, but now there was one addition. "Sawasdee khrab. You are... the husband?"
"Khrab."
Doctor nodded, "Okay. I'm dr.Wasit Muninthorn khrab. I'm in charge of Khun Vachirawit Chivaaree."
"I'm Win khrab, Metawin Opas-iamkajorn."
"Khun Win," dr.Wasit said as he turned to the nurse for a piece of paper. "We've got-"
"P'Bright got fever at night for 3 days. He shivered."
"In the morning, he was fine, wasn't he?"
"Khrab."
"We've got the information from Khun Uncle and Khun Manager that he threw up everytime he ate something."
"That's true, doc. He ate less for almost a week and it got worse just yesterday." Eed added.
"He has never skipped his breakfast," Win mumbled. "What is wrong...?"
People around Win was able to hear it. They smiled at each other while Win was getting tense, playing with his fingers.
The doctor cleared his throat before answering, distracted Win who was wondering by himself to look up. "Those symptoms are supporting the test result. From the result, Khun Vachirawit Chivaaree gets thypoid fever. It's caused by bacteria through contaminated food or water."
"The food-"
"Not the meal you both cooked, obviously." Eed corrected Win before he think negatively too far. "Probably, the meal he got when attending events or in the shooting location, and he was not fit enough that time."
"Correct," dr.Wasit agreed. "He was not in his best condition and he was exposed with the food."
Dr.Wasit checked Bright's condition. Bright did not open his eyes even for a second. Before he excused himself, dr.Wasit said, "He needs bedrest here for, at least, 3 days under our treatment and observation. If he gets better, he is allowed to go home, having bedrest for another 3 days. For lunch, we will try to prepare soft solid food and watch if he was able to eat it well. Also..."
Win was stupefied when dr.Wasit looked at him carefully.
"He needs you to take care of him the most at this time, so don't get sick like him. Stay healthy. No need to be stressed out." dr.Wasit reminded him.
Uncle Kik patted Win's shoulder. "Did you hear what dr.Wasit said? Come on, cheer up. Look at Bright who is sleeping peacefully. Don't you love to see it?"
Win smiled as he looked at Bright, "He is cute."
"Yes," Uncle Kik was relieved to see Win back to his usual self. "Now, it's time to greet the reporters outside and update them abo-"
"Uncle," Win paused him. "Please do me a favor."
•
Sleeping too long caused Bright feeling like it was all like a dream. It was more like a dream when he saw Win, sitting on the sofa bed with a laptop on his lap. He was wearing glasses. Slowly, he changed his lying position to the side, so he could watch Win clearly. That time, Win realized that Bright had woken up.
A wide smile was given to Bright. Then, Win looked away, back to his work.
"You've changed your clothes..." Bright commented. His voice was hoarse, heavier, but lower in volume.
"Yup," Win replied. "I've changed my clothes, I've taken a shower, and I've had breakfast."
"Good boy..."
Win nodded. He put his laptop aside and moved to sit on the chair beside the bed. "P'Bright get typhoid fever. That's why, you have to stay in the hospital for 3 days."
"Is that so...?"
"Khrab. I already told my secretary and the directors. Papa is fine with it, too."
"There are many people that can take turn to accompany me here..."
"So, you don't want me to accompany you."
"It's not like that..."
"I already made it possible to be with you after you get better, but you don't want it."
"Win..."
"Nong Win," Uncle Kik suddenly entered the room. "The reporters did not want to listen to Mae Eed and me. They asked things related to you. No one spotted you in the hospital. They said people out there assuming you were too busy to-"
"I'll take care of them," Win got up from his seat. "It seems like taking care of the reporters is easier than being here." Win left the room.
Uncle Kik's jaw slacked. He turned to Bright. The young man was still staring at the window even though Win could not be seen anymore. "What have you done, Bright?"
Bright exhaled heavily. He forgot that at the time like this, Win was vulnerable and getting more sensitive than usual. "I annoyed him."
•
Why is it like this? Win asked himself. Things did not work as he wanted. He only wanted to give his time for Bright when he was sick. Back then, when he was active in entertainment industry, he could not take a break when Bright was sick. If he had schedule and he was not the one that sick, he had to do the work.
As a businessman, Win had more flexible working hours and he could take days off or even work from home. Why are you like this, P'Bright? He could not help but being upset as he walked to the front door of hospital where the reporters gathered.
At the time Win appeared in front them, Eed was stupefied. She did not expect the young man will appear for the first time by himself after the retirement.
"Sawasdee khrab."
Before the reporters started asking, Win had given a sign with shaking his head and immediately talking.
"Regarding my husband, Bright Vachirawit's condition, I would like to inform everyone that diagnosis is typhoid fever. I believe that his manager and our uncle already informed it. He will need few days bedrest in the hospital. As you all know, the symptoms are related to digestive system, so we have to make sure that his appetite is back and he is able to eat solid food normally without throwing up. After that, he can rest for more few days at home. Please pray for his recovery khrab."
Win took a deep breath. There was a voice keep repeating a sentence that Bright said to him.
"There are many people that can take turn to accompany me here"
How could Bright be hard-headed at the time like this? Win was still wondering, but he had to hide his own feeling to inform the important thing to the reporters.
"Also, next time, Uncle Kik and P'Eed are the ones who will update the news about P'Bright because I'm not here to do this. I just want to be by my husband's side. So, please understand the situation and I apologize for not showing up later. Thank you so much."
Win wai at the reporters and turned around, leaving. His face was all emotionless. He entered Bright's room and hurriedly packed his bag. He put his laptop inside the case. He did not take a look at his surrounding.
"Umm... Nong Win..." Uncle Kik called Win hesitantly as he watched the young man was in a rush. "Nong-"
"Uncle," Win broke in. "Since Uncle and P'Eed can take turn to take care of P'Bright, then please, take care of him. I have to go to work and..."
"Win," Bright tried to stop Win. He sat up.
"...I will visit him again on weekend."
Uncle Kik narrowed his eyes. "Are you joking right now, Nong Win?"
"Win,"
"I'm serious."
"Wi-argh!"
Win and Uncle Kik turned to Bright immediately. Win noticed the infusion tube fell on the floor, so he ran to Bright without delay.
"Let me see your hand first," Win grabbed Bright's hand and checked. "Uncle Kik, would you please inform the nurse that the IV tube and needle are detached khrab? Tell them that it's bleeding, too, khrab."
"Okay."
Bright did not take his eyes off Win, enjoying the view of his husband taking care of him. It felt good. It felt exactly like their love all this years, taking care of each other.
"You must be in pain. Later, don't move around na khrab. There is a needle, so be careful and slow down when moving." Win reminded Bright, still holding the hand for the blood not to stain the bed sheet, and his eyes were on it.
Bright could not control his mouth. It opened by itself, pushed by the urge to correct his mistake. "Win, listen to me..."
Win looked up. He shrugged his eyebrows. "Have I ever not listened to you?"
Bright did not answer. Their eyes locked.
"Sawasdee kha~" The nurse came into the room with Uncle Kik. "Excuse me. Please extended your hand kha. Don't be tense. Relax your hand." The nurse took over Bright's hand from Win.
Win moved away.
"Don't leave, Win..."
"I'm here," Win said. He just changed his position and stood beside the nurse. "Stay still. The nurse is working on you."
"I'm sorry about earlier," Bright stayed still, but his lips could not keep silent. "I didn't mean to hurt your feeling or force you to go. Believe me, I only have good intention..."
Win's eyes widened. Not because of what Bright said, but the nurse was between them, working with the IV tube and needle. She was now being awkward. She tried to focus on the job, but could not help to take a glance at Win and Bright, then looked down, back to Bright's hand, trying not to check on the two young man.
"...This is my fault for getting sick. I did not look after myself well. I don't want to get in your way because you have to work. I really love you, that's-"
"It's done kha," The nurse interrupted. "Please move slowly na kha. Excuse me."
Uncle Kik followed the nurse to get out of the room right when Eed came back. He pushed Eed out with him.
After they were left alone, Win took a deep breath. "Are you finished talking?"
"I really love you,"
"That's the second time. You've said it before."
"I will repeat it many times, as much as you want, but don't leave."
Win shook his head. "You don't need to. It's not like I'm questioning your feeling. P'Bright is just annoying today."
Bright extended his arms like requesting for a hug, so Win came closer to let Bright reach him.
"I think, you got better already. You've talked a lot." Win chuckled when Bright's free arm was trying to surround his body. "Dr.Wasit said, they will try to give you solid food for lunch."
"I talked a lot because you are leaving me..."
"I'm not leaving you. I just listened to your request. You want me to go to work, I'll go." Win reasoned.
Bright clammed up. He exhaled heavily. Did they come back to the starting point? He thought he had to apologize once more since his husband brought it up again.
"Can I stay with you until you get well, then?"
Win's question made Bright exhaled again. "Umm, you can," Bright nodded. "You can..." Bright squeezed Win with one arm.
Win noticed it. He hugged the older man who was struggling to do it properly. "Okay, come here."
Bright snuggled on Win's chest. The gentle stroke on Bright's head was calming. "I miss you so bad."
Win laughed. "What are you talking about? We meet everyday."
"I miss you..."
"Alright, alright. I miss you, too." Win was still laughing at Bright. But what to do? Win could tolerate everything for Bright. He stood there, and...
Uncle Kik sighed after he closed the door. He just peeked to check the couple.
"How?" Eed asked. She had been told by Kik about the argument. She did not had a chance to witness it.
Uncle Kik shrugged. "Win is babying Bright. I guess, it is settled already."
"Eh? Already?"
"Umm," Uncle Kik confirmed. "Oh, do Mae Eed want to come inside? Kik think, Kik will pick Bright's Mom now. Tell them that I'm going na."
Eed hissed. "Are you leaving me between them again?"
"Oh, come on, Mae," Kik cackled. "You know you love them."
•••
Oh? It feels good, always, to write about their daily life. Light and relateable with us :))))
Anyway, the wedding is coming soon.
Stay tuned.
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xoxo,
dedededeva 💋