My mind had been thinking about what to do for almost two weeks. I have been splitting time between Eli and Colten, both have been showing me different techniques for battle. I was more than grateful but I couldn’t see myself winning a battle with an experienced vampire. I know some how I was supposed to win this but nothing would make it make sense to me. All I could do is give it my best and keep trying.
Eli was trying his hardest not to let it show he was bothered. He was terrible at it but he just wasn’t the same and I could imagine why. I had a harder time justifying all my absences. Ezra always backed me up but I knew Eli wouldn’t stand for it much longer. He had been more than reasonable. I think now I was coming off as cheating. I didn’t consider my time with Colten cheating, I mean yea I loved him the way I loved Eli but nothing ever happened between us. I did feel bad being around Colten cause I always had this urge to make something happen.
I needed some time with my best friend again. I just couldn’t see her understanding it. I was letting myself get away again. My heart wasn’t as close to my friends as it used to be. It was almost like there wasn’t enough space since Colten came into the picture.
I consulted with Colten and invited Brook out for a day on the square (aka the only fun thing in Ocala). I didn’t tell her anything since Colten said it wasn’t the right time. I manipulated our way into a club at night and we danced until she was tired. This was very different from what we usually do, but we both agreed with all the things happening, different was better. I missed Brook so much and it took the day out to see it. I could see how different she was. She missed me too. I hadn’t noticed how much it effected her that I was so distant and different. Ever since I became a vampire our relationship changed so rapidly. This was my fault. I should have told her, but I knew things were supposed to happen this way because I turned out to be the Soul Seer.
“Don’t worry Addi you guys will be like you once were after this is over. I’m sure of it.” Colten whispered in my head as I drove home. I wanted to ask how he knew if he couldn’t see past the day of the battle, but I had to save it for later.
The next night I stared out the window of the house into the dark woods that surrounded us. Colten kept going over everything he taught me in my head so it would stay fresh in my head. Listening to him now was like a second nature. I didn’t need to think about it I just trusted his voice in my head. I missed them both. Something just wasn’t right about all this, something was missing. There was no way I could chose one life over the other. There was just something inside me telling me there was more to this than I am seeing now. The both of them some how fit into my life perfectly. I just wasn’t meant to know how yet, and neither was Colten cause is mind kept kicking him out every time he tried to find out.
I felt arms wrap around my waist and instantly I closed my eyes.
“Don’t say it Addi.” Colten said in my head.
My eyes shot open cause I felt the urge to say his name out loud, but the second Eli pulled me closer to him that urge was gone. With Colten constantly in my head its hard to remember who I am around.
“Addi” Eli whispered in my ear.
I turned around to look at him and wondered how I was ever supposed to break his heart. He made me, I love him. Ever since the first day we met there was something there, there was no way fate expected me to let him go.
“Can we go for a walk? I need to talk to you about a few things.”
I nodded, still afraid of what my mouth say if I opened it.
“Just tell him the truth to everything he asks. This is the right time.” Colten told me.
Great this was going to be wonderful. But he knew what he was talking about so when he asked I would tell him everything he needed to know.
We walked a few minutes away before he started to slow down and walk at a human pace.
“Addi.” he said and paused like he was waiting for me to answer.
“Yes?”
“I am going to stop teaching you to fight.”
I stopped where I was “Why? I need to learn. I’m not as experienced as you are!” I found myself getting angry that he would just leave me out the hang like that. I was no where near ready .
“I’m not teaching you anymore because I don’t want you to come the day Elfin comes. I can’t risk something happening to you out there. These vampires are way more experienced than most of us, especially you . If something happens to you then something is happening to me cause I’m not going to live forever if your not there.”
I was flattered and insulted at the same time. He was being caring and telling me he didn’t think I could survive in battle. Yup flattered and insulted at the same second.
“Eli, I don’t know what to say, but I don’t care if your not going to teach me anything anymore. I am going to be there whether you like it or not. I love and respect you but there is not walking around this one. I don’t need you to train me but I would appreciate a little support from the person I care about the most. I don’t have too much confidence but I am meant to do this whether you like it or not.”
He caught on to what I said “What do you mean meant to?”
“Exactly as I said it. I am meant to fight in this battle.”
“Addi, what is going on with you lately? I try not to say anything but I know there is something going on with you . I just cant figure out what it is.”
I sighed, this was it. “Eli… there are things I have to tell you. I don’t know if you will understand or not. Please just listen to everything before you react in any sort of way.” I than began to tell him about why I was acting so strange before. I took him through everything step by step, story but story. He was as shocked as Ezra. Turns out he did know what a Soul Seer was, he has just never really believed it. Everything went fine and he understood that I had to fight in the battle, he even agreed to keep helping me, until I got to the part about my two hearts. That he wasn’t really willing to understand because it made no sense. I tried to explain it didn’t make sense to me either and how Colten couldn’t tell me what would happen, but he wasn’t in the mood to hear it. He said he understood that it wasn’t my fault how things happened but didn’t mean he still wasn’t hurt. He was right. I couldn’t spring something like I love someone else as much as I love you and expect him to say ok that’s fine with me. I let him walk off back to the house alone, as he requested. I didn’t know how I could feel more horrible than I did at that moment.
“Don’t worry, he will be ok. He will understand soon. Ezra is going to take care of it.” Colten appeared in front of me. I just looked at him. I didn’t really feel like seeing him right now. “Want to come to my realm?” he asked sweetly. I could tell he was just trying to make me feel better but I didn’t want to feel better.
“No. I think I will just go home right now.”
He nodded “G-ma and Jenkins miss you” was all he said and then disappeared. He was right I should visit them. I have been so focused on so many other things I often forgot to call them.
I went home and took my car keys without saying a word to anyone. I saw Eli but he just looked away. Ezra was with Brook having their own moment, I could tell he caught sight of me with the corner of his eye. I just nodded towards Eli, who was sitting on the couch like the house was empty. Ezra nodded and went back to Brook.
My silent drive was not as nice as I hoped it would be. It was too much time for thoughts to go through my head. The visit with G-ma and Jenkins was what I needed. Sometimes I missed living with them. They sometimes provided nice conversation, I did miss the boring stuff too. We played some card games just like old times. They offered me to sleep in my old room, and I just couldn’t turn them down. I wouldn’t do any sleeping but it was so nice to be home. I convinced them to let me bring the TV from the living room into my room for the night. I wouldn’t make it up there all night without something to entertain me.
I laid in bed feeling like I had no problems in life, like I was really sixteen years old again. I ran through the last few months of my life in my head. I have had a very adventurous, dream filled time. People cant even imagine the things that have happened to me. Deep in thought I heard someone knocking at my window. I jumped up as the memories of all the times Eli used to come see me through my window. Half of me thought it was him and the other half thought it was Olivia.
I walked over and slowly lifted up my blinds. Eli was there pointing at the lock on the window. I half smiled and unlocked it so he can come in.
“What are you doing here?” I asked. I couldn’t help the smile that played at my lips. He was still so gorgeous and I could tell he forgave me. He tried so hard not to smile back at me, but it didn’t work. He picked me up and carried me to the bed and laid me down. He didn’t say a word to me. He laid down next me to and kissed me. That was the I understand now kiss. Then he pulled my body to his, he missed the times we had before all this mess just like I did. I didn’t stop things from where they were going, we hadn’t been alone in so long, I just wished this night would last more than a few hours.
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I feel this chapter is kind of short but i wanted to bring back some times with Brook and have a refresher of Eli and Addi. Next chapter I am planning Olivia's return, and soon the close out of my story.