Ohhh, my head... It sure felt dead...
My everything hurt...
For the space of what felt like three hours, I remembered nothing more than darkness all around. Nothing could be seen or heard. Only felt. It made me think of that time back when I found myself floating in outer space before I crash-landed on this exotic world.
So far, it's been quite the journey, and never would I have imagined myself ending up in a situation as ridiculous as this.
Captured by talking animals... I realized... great...
While I did give them hell, I felt that I was taken in much too quickly... What a disgrace to the human race...
Placed into limbo...
But where did they take me?
Now, as the veil of obscurity gradually lifted before my eyes, I already knew where I was. At first, I figured that it all could've been a spacious grassland field on a cloudy day.
But why though?
Well, there were green colors all around me, I sat on a brown patch of dirt, and the sky had an overcast stretched all over the horizon. Not exactly the rocky mountains as I originally expected but I would've easily taken it over the city. Perhaps my punishment ended up being banishment? Becoming an outcast in the middle of nowhere?
That would've been nice...
However, there was no wind, no breeze, and no organic grass. No natural sunlight but an artificial ceiling light with a metal cage over it. No big open field but a small closed room. The lower half of the brick walls were painted a light green color, the upper portion was painted with grey cloud colors, and the concrete floor had a light brown color.
And what were those rectangular shapes in front of me? Ah, yes, an organized array of steel bars.
Lovely.
As I lazily panned my head around - to adjust from the tranquilizer dart's tranquilizing effects that made me more tranquil in a tranquilized way - my ears popped, my vision cleared, and my mind jolted wide awake as if I were falling out of a chair.
I hated it when that happened. Deception by Inception...
My entire body shook with enough force that I could both hear and feel the binding strength of clattering chains strapped to multiple points on my limbs. Goodness, they sure had me tied down well and there was no use in trying to break free.
At least, for now.
I was too tired and feeling too much pain to do anything right now.
Beneath the chains, they also fitted me with a straight jacket with my arms tied sideways in a prayer-like position, handcuffs secured my gauntlets in place, leg cuffs kept my boots together, and upon my helmet, they happened to place a... a muzzle? Seriously? Okay... whatever... whatever made them feel secure.
Nevermind, scratch that, it had to come off.
I violently flung my head around until it slid right off. Much much better.
But the rest of my restraints weren't coming off anytime soon, unfortunately. On the bright side, at least the straight jacket matched the color of my armor.
Turns out, I was sitting on a bench in a jail cell with my back leaning against the metal grating. Just 'chilling', as the reckless teenagers would say.
But in a jail cell? Those animals successfully placed me behind bars? In a zoo-like cage? Oh, the irony.
But what a surprise... I mean, where else would I be? In a sauna with a white towel around my neck? Not a chance!
Man, why was I being so weird? Why was I thinking like this? I blamed it on the tranquilizer drug that miraculously got injected into me. And who's the one that did it? Ah, yes, it was her.
My, what a shot...
But how did she manage?
The nano armor around my hands must've been too thin. An ultra-fine needle shot from the right angle has a positional advantage to slip past the particles, especially if they're not tightly bonded together. Plus, having military armor that's hundreds of years old in my timeline AND being in the wrong dimension wouldn't help much either.
My white armor was indeed old, aged, and it just couldn't keep up and perform as efficiently as black Seraphim armor. Granted, my armor surpassed any technological wonder of this world, including all other worlds we invaded; however, the Seraphim's pico particle armor and advanced weaponry made my suit feel like an antique.
But why rationalize? Forget about the armor. Just admit it...
...I got bested by a bunny and a fox. Go figure.
But I wasn't disappointed anymore. Rather, I found it to be quite hilarious. I could take a hit from a rhino, punch a tiger, choke a lion, smack a wolf, crush a polar bear, only to be beaten by the two smallest animals in the group. The fox was a mere distraction but the bunny definitely got me good.
True, she knew me better than anyone else in this world so she had that to her advantage.
Regardless, I found it rather impressive that she could take down an interstellar soldier such as myself. After all, my weapons were fully drawn out but she pulled out enough courage to face me. Normally I'd be angry or heavily embarrassed but I actually felt relaxed for some reason. Was it that tranquilizer solution? Did that calm me down a bit? No idea.
Either way, I was just glad that no one died back there.
But feelings of guilt did pour into me here and there. I regretted some of my decisions while others I didn't regret at all. I took a stand, I tried, and I failed. What more could I do? The problem with being a pure human is that emotion gets in the way of decisionmaking and that's what happened back there. I held back and chose not to kill even though I was tempted multiple times to do so.
Any other colleague of mine wouldn't hesitate to pull the trigger because they were all pre-programmed to dismiss those kinds of distractive emotions. I was one of the rare few to be over 70% human, meaning that I only lost less than 30% of my emotion due to cybernetic enhancements.
But as for the rest of humanity? Most lost at least 89% of their emotions. Any emotion remaining after that was reserved only for their close loved ones... if they had any. Otherwise, they'd dispose of any foreign life form that stood in their way.
Thank goodness it was me in that lobby and not some other human from my world. If that were the case, then there would be a vast shortage of body bags.
Thus, in my eyes, the situation could've been far worse; but in Zootopia's eyes, my act must've appeared awfully cruel to them. For small-scale crimes in my world, a simple man would end up in a hellish space prison. But in Zootopia, a heinous crime only put me in a humble jail such as this one here. Quite a stark difference I must say.
The jail cell appeared to be outdated but it wasn't necessarily spooky or anything. Rather, it had a basic design with enough green color to reduce the monotony and it was well lit and cozy. No laser grids, no depressing blue lights, no zero-gravity, and no eerie sounds from a dead space station. Just a simple environment with planetary gravity to keep me in place.
Nothing like my cold, empty, and depressing world...
Also, my limbs weren't cut off - as was customary for most criminals in my former society - and I was only bounded by carbon steel chains on all four limbs. Nothing too harsh except that my nose itched a bit and I couldn't scratch it.
So why does the nose always itch when we cannot scratch it? Who knows.
No matter, I deserved my situation even though I could've deserved much more for all the punches, kicks, stomps, and throws I inflicted upon those helpless animal officers. I disliked jail but it could've been much worse. It anything, it felt more like a time-out than jail.
But wait... maybe this place was simply a waiting area... until the time came for me to receive my corporal punishment? If so, then they'd need something much bigger than a wooden stick to bring me down. They wouldn't get a word out of me and I'd be ready for anything they threw towards my direction.
But based on what I did to the chief of police, he'd probably send a herd of charging rhinos up my rear instead. Not enough space to do that here so he'd need to place me in a long hallway of some sort to build up their momentum. A bowling alley, a runway, a ski slope, I'm sure they'd get creative if it meant getting revenge.
Oh boy... the very thought of that rhino officer ramming me into that glass trophy case made my entire body ache with pain... Please no...
All I could do now was hope for the best. Fingers crossed. But I literally couldn't cross them. Why? Because they happened to put my fingers in restraints as well. Seriously? I couldn't see them because the straight jacket blocked my view but I could not move my fingers around whatsoever. Yikes.
The ZPD really outdid themselves with these restraints. One could not blame them because any sane creature would do the same exact thing for their fellow brethren if a random white armored alien began punching them in a willy-nilly-like fashion.
What was I thinking? Why'd I do it? Clearly, I wasn't thinking at all. Maybe I thought I was thinking but I didn't think well enough to think.
Oh well. What's done is done.
Suddenly, the floor beneath me began to echo as I heard distant but loud chanting voices from the ZPD officers one level below that made the metal air vents vibrate a tad.
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY OFFICER GRIZZOLI!" they all chanted from below.
They sang, they popped confetti, and it sounded like over thirty animals were congregated in the room below. Elephants trumpeted, lions roared, and wolves howled all together in unison. Not gonna lie, it sounded incredible.
Their voices and lyrics were muffled by the layers of concrete barriers but there was still a significant amount of activity going on. I guess the broken glass, the bullet holes, the bruised limbs, the shattered furniture, and the spilled donuts didn't stop them from celebrating the officer's birthday.
Thank goodness though. On the bright side, at least the white wolf officer didn't get punched in the face on his birthday. Always look at the positive, I tell myself.
" ...happy birthday Grizzoli... " I said in the least charismatic way possible.
They were having their fun while I sat here with nothing to do. Bored out of my mind and unable to do anything to entertain me. No bouncy ball, no yo-yo, no rugby ball, no golf putter, no book, no tablet, no hologram, and no pull-up bar.
Noise from the lobby down below continued to resonate and - for the next couple of hours - music played and the party kept going and going. At this point, they might as well call it a victory celebration for detaining me instead of calling it a birthday celebration. Obviously, it wasn't true but it definitely sounded like it.
Whatever, let them cheer, let them chant, and let them celebrate. I gave them a hell of an evening so they ought to enjoy the night. Poor Judy's probably filling out a stack of paperwork.
But at least I was all alone. That's what I've always wanted. True, I didn't get to surround myself with stone mountains but my wish was partially complete because I ended up being surrounded by stone walls. The walls are like mountains, aren't they? Just a little smaller...
No, not at all. Nevermind, this sucked. This bit the hand.
This was unfortunate.
This was not ideal... This was laughable...
Now I was stuck in a Zootopian jail. Soon to be Zootopian prison after they've heard my story. What's next? The science academy? I'm sure my suit would make a neat museum piece after they've dissected my cold dead body.
But, at the minimum, I had the whole cell block to myself: A place to be stuck in my own thoughts and free to ponder the rest of the night away. Perhaps I could get a good night's rest, put a pause on my negative thoughts, and resume them for tomorrow.
...
"Hey!" a voice called.
...
Oh, for Pete's sake...
...
"Yo, over here!" it called again. "Yoo-hoo!"
"Hey, you with the face!"
Mildly irritated, I leaned forward and spotted three spotted hyenas that were two cells away. Two of them were male and had light brown fur with dark spots, a black t-shirt, matching grey jackets, and conservative-colored jeans. The female, who happened to be the largest of them, had smoky brown fur with dark spots, dark muzzle and ears, brown eyes, a black hoodie, and grey jeans.
In other words, hideous. All of them were hideous.
Their spots reminded me of typical prisoner tattoos and their irksome grins didn't amuse me one bit. Down one more cell from them, I recognized the tiger named Andy who simply sat there and didn't act like a fool for once. Good for him.
Now that I didn't despise the tiger as much, I had other animals to despise.
As I got a better look, I recognized one of the male hyenas from Savanna Central. The same one that Officer Hopps must've chased down. Did she end up catching all three of these hyenas? Impressive.
They made those annoying laughs that everyone hates and continued to eyeball me for too long. Never thought I'd meet talking hyenas and they were just as annoying as they appeared on television. Maybe even worse in person.
"Well, well, well, Vonzai, what have we got here?" the female grinned, elbowing the hyena next to her. He leaned forward to get a better look.
"Hmm. I don't know, Mashenzi. Uh... what do you think, Eddy?"
The other crazy male said nothing and only started laughing hysterically. "Hooo, hooo, hooo! Ha, HA!"
"Yeah, just what I was thinking, we've got ourselves a trespasser!" "Oooh, and a trespasser that's..."
"UuuugLY!" they all exploded in laughter.
"Hey," I interrupted, "Why don't you shut the hell up?"
"Oooooh, that tingles!"
"Awww, snap!"
"Ouchies! HaHa!"
"Ha, Ho ho hooo!"
"Lookie here boys! It talks!"
"The creature has spoken, everyone!"
"HA! At least we ain't the ones all chained up!"
"Looooser!"
All three hyenas guffawed in unison. They were asking for it.
"Yeah, and and and what are you anyhow? Huh?"
"What are ya? What are ya?"
"Some sorta freak?"
"HAA! Freak!"
All three mockingly stared, waiting for me to respond but I kept quiet and gave them an indifferent look. Lucky for them, the chains prevented me from walking over and smashing their pathetic skulls in. My, they were too hyper and wouldn't stop moving. They must've eaten a lot of paint chips when they were little kids.
"Oooh," the female pointed towards me, "Look at dem eyes!"
"Wooo! Soo oogly!"
"They make me shudder!"
"They be blue, blue as a jewel!"
"Kinda like dat necklace we stole, eh?"
"Ooooh!"
"Whoa, whoa, wait wait wait... I know him."
"Yeah, he's that bunny's little stooge."
"From the plaza, eh?"
"Ya, the one I told ya about,"
"Yeah, he be the one."
"Ain't he?" "Oooooh, hoo-hoo"
"Wasn't he also da one who messed up all our plans?"
"Took away our early retirement?"
"Our money!"
"Ma chance to buy a new phone!"
"My Pawtify subscription!"
"Nah, that was the bunny! Ya know, the one from TV!"
"Ah, she dat same one who solved the, uh, whatchamacallit, the Nite Hooters case?"
"Ya mean the Night Howlers?"
"Ha! Stupid!"
"Yea, yea, that's the one I'm talkin' about!"
"Really?! So she the one who got Fred?"
"Ha! She got me too!"
"C'mon, Vonzai!" the female hyena punched the male hyena in the shoulder, "You let your ol' sis down? You had the case in your sad little paws this whole time?"
"Yo, don't look at me, Mashenzie! Andy had that lil' necklace the whole time. I was just keepin' Mrs. Floppy Ears distracted with a decoy case, ya know."
"Oooooh, right,"
"Yeah Andy, so how'd you lose it? Huh? old buddy, old pal?"
"Did you lose it? Huh? Did-ya-did-ya-did-ya?"
"Diiiid yaaa, looose it?"
They all eagerly looked at the tiger, waiting for him to respond, but he said nothing, stared downward in disappointment, and fidgetted with his paws.
"Andyyyyy! Yoo-hoo!" the female called.
"What's wrong pal?"
"Yeah! Cat got his own tongue? Eh? Ha! Get it? His own tongue... Cause he's a cat!" the male laughed hysterically.
"It's not that funny, Ed,"
"Hoooo, HAAA, hAA! HA!"
He tried to stop laughing but burst out worse. "Yo, shut up!" the female jokingly growled.
"Hoo, HEE, hee, hEE!"
The male continued to laugh, shedding tears, and would NOT stop laughing. The three hyenas got into a fight, wrestled with each other, and seemingly did so in an immaturely playful way. While they were going at each other, the tiger and I briefly exchanged gazes from across the room and we both shook our heads at the hyenas. I could tell some sense was coming back to him.
Suddenly, the metal doors at the end of the room slid open and three stocky rhinos in full SWAT gear stepped inside the jail block. One of them noticed the hyena commotion, grew irritated and made his way towards them.
"Hey!" he shouted, hitting the steel bars with his baton. "Knock it off!"
The hyenas immediately broke away, let out a mischievous smile, and tried to play innocent.
"Well, she started it!" the male hyena pointed his paw at the female who gave him a squinted look. The other male hyena continued to cackle nonstop.
"I don't care who started it, I'll finish it!" the stocky rhino roared.
The three hyenas finally obeyed, albeit, with hesitation and reckless grins. They sat themselves down in their own respective corners and the SWAT group approached my jail cell.
They gave me a menacing snort, glared for a few seconds until one of them pulled out a large set of heavy keys. The steel grating slid open, the rhino stepped inside and stood directly in front of me. I looked up at him and then I stared back down at the ground.
Seven additional SWAT officers, all jackals, also entered the jail block and swiftly filed their way inside and formed a tight perimeter around me. They had black tactical gear but without any helmet, boots, or gloves like humans would wear. Each of them wielded an electric prod and cautiously readied themselves in case I made any sudden movements.
The other inmates crowded to the edge of their cell to get a better visual and murmured among each other while I kept my head down. After a quick moment of silence, the rhino SWAT officer squatted down to my level, attempted to look me in the eyes, and said, "It's time."
"Alright, get him up, slowly," the other big SWAT officer ordered. I couldn't help but notice a scar across his face.
A few SWAT officers kept their tools pointed my direction while the rest worked on detaching the wall restraints. Looks like it was time to move on to the next phase of the arrest. Prison already? I pondered to myself.
After two of the jackals unlocked the chainlinks from my boots, the rhino officer grabbed the chain across my chest plate and pulled me up to a standing position. My sore body caused me to stumble slightly but the animal officers kept me steady and escorted me out of the cell.
As we walked, I peaked back at the inmates behind me, gave the tiger a slight nod, and he returned an awkward wave before I quickly reverted my eyes forward. I heard the hyenas quietly laugh among each other as if I were about to be sentenced to the dunk tank. However, we all knew that it'd be worse than that. Perhaps it'd be the Chinese water torture but I could care less about what the Zootopians would do to me.
We exited the cell block, passed a set of double doors, and walked through a second cell block section.
I remembered torture methods from my world were beyond the unthinkable and often used as public warnings to anyone who defied the Intergalactic Stratocracy. Of course, that was after the Seraphim gained full control of all the chief branches of government. The Prophet of Perdition - Head of the Seraphim - had his own favorite methods of torment that were so disturbing physically, spiritually, and psychologically, that most dissenters decided to join his cause.
I used to think that being burned alive and thrown into a pool of salted sewage water to drown was one of the worst forms of torture. However, once I found out what the Seraphim did to their own fellow humans who opposed them, I quickly learned that being burned alive and thrown in salted sewage water to drown was nothing compared to what they did.
My body quaked at the very thought of it and this caused some of the furry SWAT guards to be on higher alert. They must've thought that I'd attempt another escape but I had no intention of doing so.
Why bother? I'd hate to go from 4 stars to 5 stars.
Shaking my head back to reality, my thoughts gradually returned to Zootopia and I remembered that this world was far unlike the one I came from. No human soldiers with phaser rifles and no biomechanical monstrosities with energy beams erupting from their heads. None of that. Just talking animals who had no lethal weapons in their possession whatsoever.
But how? I questioned. It baffled me that Zootopians had no true offensive capabilities. Were they more focused on defending one another than attacking? Even so, they had no alloy armor, no regenerative shields, and no reliable form of protection. Just cloth, hard plastic, and maybe kevlar.
The jackals had traditional tactical gear but their vest pouches were only filled with vials of tranquilizer liquid and radio equipment. No grenades, no bullets, no knife, and no lethal. No boots, just bare feet. No gloves, just padded paws. No helmet, just pointed ears. No rifle, just an electric rod. No jetpack, just a tail.
True, the SWAT rhinos could've offered some form of an offensive measure with their horns; however, any standard phaser pistol from my world - even a civilian grade level - could drop one of these creatures in 1-2 shots.
All of this made me feel guilty about being human because we evolved to a point in which we only found more effective ways of killing and destroying each other as time went on. Nuclear weapons, antimatter bombs, neuro-toxins, ChemRails, phasers, the list could go on.
But these animals were nowhere near that.
Even though I'm a walking weapon of lethal proportions, perhaps I could be different? Maybe I could somehow show Zootopia the good side of mankind? In my world, I knew many succeeded back when Earth's ecosystems were still intact but those days were long gone before the universe ended.
Now that Zootopia had me in their paws - unbeknownst to them, the last human - it was time to make amends. We exited the second cell block and we were now walking through the third one.
Judy and her bunny partner Nick were probably busy with their mountain-load of police reports regarding me. Thus, the least I could do was cooperate with the ZPD and try my best to stabilize the situation.
As for the fox - Officer Wilde, if I remembered his name correctly - I'm sure he and his other fox partner were long gone. If someone pointed a gun at my face, then I'd never want to see them again.
We passed the last set of holding cells - some empty, some filled with other animal crooks - and we exited the third cell block. Now we were in another standard ZPD hallway that had the same style of spotted giraffe lights like the ones downstairs. More SWAT mammals joined our group and they consisted of two large elephants, a lion, and one more rhino in full protective torso gear. None of them I recognized from earlier so they must've been summoned from another police unit.
All of them treated me like a live frag grenade that could go off at any minute. The entire building had tightened security and I wondered why.
They led me across the upper balcony of the main lobby where all the previous fighting took place. I peaked down below but there were no familiar animal officers present so they must've taken the party elsewhere or maybe gone home for the day. Hopefully, most would recover from their injuries by tomorrow.
Thus, the only animals present on the ground floor were a few zebras sweeping up the broken glass, twelve security officers of different species guarding the entrance, and two giraffes dressed in business suits were taking pictures of the bullet holes that I left in the ceiling. I guess you could say that things were getting pretty serious.
As I scanned the lobby further while walking alongside the SWAT animals, I continued to marvel at the sheer size of this location.
We were at least on the fourth floor in terms of elephant height so this entire police station had a good amount of breadth, width, and depth to it.
Outside the windows, the time was already past nightfall. The only light I'd be getting for the rest of tonight would be a bright lamp shining in my face. Unlike the Pixar lamp, it wouldn't crush the 'i' but it would certainly strain my eye. This civilization didn't have the technology for high-intensity laser grids so at least I didn't have to worry about that kind of light.
"Turn to your left,"
I obeyed the rhino and followed a narrow hallway consisting of lime green and white-colored bricks until we reached an intersection stretching both ways.
"Alright sir, turn to your right," the jackal ordered.
The jackals escorted me down yet another corridor until we reached a larger room with a handful of computer stations, vials, and what appeared to be forensic kits. Some sort of laboratory.
We stopped in place and the lion removed the heavy chains and carefully unraveled the smaller chains around me which felt nice. Using great caution and keeping the electric rods within close proximity to my neck, the elephant hesitantly removed the straight jacket from my torso. Four more SWAT officers - a wolverine, a honey-badger, a grizzly bear, and another rhino - entered the room to join us. All of them wielded long-barreled tranquilizer guns that appeared to be high pressured.
Talk about tightened security...
"Search him." the high ranking officer ordered. "Yes, sir."
The animals immediately began feeling my body for any hidden weapons. The shorter ones checked the lower extremities while the taller ones checked the upper torso.
They couldn't find anything. At least, nothing obvious for them. "Nothing, sir."
"Nothing?"
"Nothing."
"Check again."
They looked at each other with confusion but obeyed orders either way. Some even scratched my forearms to see if I pulled any clever tricks to keep my weapons hidden. Little did these fools know that my entire suit was a weapon and that my gun's nanoparticles were all part of my suit.
"Anything?" he asked impatiently. "Negative."
"Not a thing, sir,"
The rhino let out an irritated sigh. "Fine. Lock him down."
"Have a seat right here," the bear officer ordered, "Keep your feet flat on the floor,"
The elephant pulled a metal chair out and carefully guided me into it. The jackals quickly locked both my boots and my gauntlets to the legs of the chair and nothing happened for the next seven minutes.
We simply sat there in silence and listened to the quiet echos of the station.
What are we waiting for? Chinese new year? I thought to myself. Even some of the SWAT guards discreetly checked their watches and I personally wondered what we were doing here. I thought about asking one of them but I decided to remain quiet, not say a word, and only obey.
One of the jackal guards tried to keep a serious face but I caught him staring at me a few times. He pretended to remain focused and on task but I could tell that my alien-like presence sparked his curiosity. If I looked away, he would keenly stare; but, if I looked at him, he would quickly avert his gaze away.
Not just him, but the other SWAT officers around me seemed to be unsettled. Some took deep breaths, others exhaled, and a few tightened their grip on the electric prods while trying to appear confident. I could sense a pattern of nervousness so I tried to relax as much as I could to help take the edge off. My body language was the only way I could communicate and every facial emotion I had was locked behind my mask.
One thing I loved about helmets is that you could make any face you wanted and get away with it. But these animals didn't have that luxury so they were under more pressure to remain facially professional.
...
Finally, the door in the back room swung wide open and I anticipated who it could've been. I could hear footsteps getting closer and closer but nothing could be seen. The sound got louder and louder but still nothing. We all waited, or rather, I waited... but no one was there.
...
Just when I thought it was a ghost, I saw three claws pop out from behind the edge of the door. But then they retreated back. What? Next, a head popped out then the other set of claws came out from behind the door. Finally, I saw three claw toes step out from behind the door, albeit slowly, and I saw a mammal that I hadn't seen before.
...
A sloth. A three-toed sloth to be more specific.
She had brown fur with a cream-colored face, brown eyes, long claws the same color as her face, and a rather bulbous nose. In her head fur, there were several strips of blue hair. Her outfit consisted of a dark blue shirt with blue stripes, a white lab coat, lab glasses, and a necklace with a blue pendant. Upon her friendly looking face, she also had a sleepy expression.
She gave everyone a slow, lazy wave as she gradually approached us with a painfully lagged speed. Watching her walk unhurriedly felt worse than watching a Youtube video at 0.25-speed. The door she came in was only 17 feet away and yet it took her a good 170 seconds to reach my position.
What's up with her? Were all sloths like this? I looked back and forth between the two SWAT officers next to me for clarification and one of them simply gave me a solemn nod of admission. Turns out, I wasn't the only one going crazy here.
With no rush whatsoever, she pulled up a metal chair next to me that painstakingly skidded and scratched across the hard floor. She then sat herself down at the same rate that peanut butter flows out of an upside-down jar and lazily examined me from head to toe.
"Thank you for joining us at this late hour, Hurriet," the rhino greeted, "We have the suspect here for testing and we're ready whenever you are."
She blinked her eyes slowly, leaned forward with a slouch, and rested her paws/claws on the table between us. A few seconds passed before she finally opened her mouth.
"Of... course... let's... get... started... ...............Your... paw... please."
The jackal unlocked one of the handcuffs so I placed my gauntlet on the counter and waited for her to do whatever she was going to do. She carefully looked at my hand for thirty seconds, marveled at its armored appearance, and slowly tapped one of my knuckles with her claws.
Next, she slowly raised her paw to her forehead as if she had a headache.
"Oh... dear... I... seem... to... have... forgotten... my... testing... kit... Please... wait... right... here... I'll... be... right... ........back..."
If watching the grass grow wasn't painful enough, then watching her stand up felt like an eternity. The rhino officer let out a low sigh and the forensic sloth eventually made her way to a glass cabinet and pulled out a set of keys to unlock it. Of course, she had to drop the keys so one of the jackal officers went over to assist her with the cabinet.
By the time the female sloth returned back to her respective chair, my arm had fallen asleep for it had dangled at my side for quite a while. I began to wonder if I was going to die in this chair since she took her precious time.
Either way, she scrupulously lifted the lid on the plastic kit and pulled out a large pad of green ink, a couple of towelettes, and some clear liquid. The entire process to unpack the silly kit took a good five minutes but I had nothing else to do.
"Right... paw... here... .......please," she said, pointing to a paper pad on the table.
To be nice, I decided to mimic her speed to a certain extent by meticulously lifting my hand and carefully preparing to rest it on the table. Even I couldn't stand how slow I moved but at least my speed only slightly surpassed hers.
She opened her mouth and said, "...Faster... please..."
You gotta be kidding me.
At that moment, I quickly plopped my gauntlet down on the table and the SWAT officers crowded around me as a precaution. The forensic sloth was physically unable to get all jittery so she proceeded in sanitizing my gauntlet, lifted it, and firmly pressed it into the green ink pad. Finally, she lifted it again and firmly pressed it into the white paper.
This entire process felt so weird to me. Not necessarily because of how slow it all was but rather the technology to get a print felt so old-fashioned. In my world, we'd simply use a 3D scanner to capture a suspect's hand anatomy but Zootopia still had the outdated methods.
I lifted my gauntlet but the lack of surface area didn't leave a well-defined handprint on paper. This seemed to baffle the officers a bit and the forensic sloth took plenty of her own time to react to the lack of a paw print that she expected.
She leaned forward, stared at the jagged green paint marks, open and closed her eyelids three times, and said, "Curious... very... curious... in... deed...,"
Seven minutes later, she finally did my other hand, cleaned them both from the green ink, and kept calling them paws. These animals just couldn't get my anatomy right and they never would.
"Do... you... mind... telling... me... what... you... ...are?"
I didn't respond.
She then tried to draw a blood sample with a needle but the tip got bent once it met with my forearm. Confused, the only thing left to do was to slowly dispose of it in the trash bin. Awkward. It was evident that Zootopia had never dealt with an alien before. Let alone, a new species.
I found it rather amusing that they assumed my armor was both clothing and hard skin. Not once did they try to pry it open and it must've been incredibly strange to them; especially if they could feel its alloy properties.
Looking at her clipboard, the written results were almost too few to be helpful but that's all they could extract from me. At least, for now. Nevertheless, the forensic specialist decided that it was sufficient enough.
"You... are... all... good... to... ...go," the sloth blinked and departed.
Without a second to spare, the jackal SWAT members placed the cuffs back on both my arms, straight jacket back on, and the brawny lion lifted me back up into a standing position.
"We appreciate it, Hurriet," the lion nodded, escorting me out of the room while the other officers followed along.
The forensic sloth opened her mouth, ever so slowly, blinked a few times, and finally let out a smile. "I'll... have... this... analyzed... in... no... time ..............flat."
Good luck with that, I pondered.
Hopefully, the ZPD didn't have any more sloths employed; otherwise, I might've tried escaping again. I'm sure those types of animals had great attention to detail even though reasonable delivery time wasn't so much their forte.
Meanwhile, we went into another room at the far end of the station that had lights, a camera, a height chart, and a male cheetah officer positioned at the camera. He wasn't the same fat one from earlier but he still gave me the same perplexed look that everyone else had been giving me since I arrived in Zootopia.
The officers escorted me into the dim room and I noticed that the height chart extended all the way up to twenty feet before it ended. I couldn't imagine why on Earth they'd need such a tall chart but then I remembered that this city had giraffes in it.
"Stand on the yellow square," the cheetah directed me.
I spotted the taped square directly at the chart's base and took a step inward. I faced forward, awaited further instruction, and listened to the indistinct chatter occurring between the rhino and the cheetah. They both whispered to each other, the cheetah rapidly flipped through a records book, his eyes grew wide, and the rhino simply nodded in confirmation that whatever he was looking at was true.
The bright camera lights made my armor gleam intensely and the white color gave off a brightness that lit up the entire room by a few notches. It felt like picture day all over again except that a whole bunch of animals were staring at me instead of humans.
They all marveled at my nonnative appearance and one of the jackals even took out a small notebook and jotted a few notes down. To break the silence, the cheetah cleared his throat, adjusted the camera, and said,
"Please look at the top light."
A green light lit up a hair above him so I placed my focus on it. The camera flashed. The cheetah took a deep breath. "Good, now look at the bottom light."
Another green light illuminated just a hair below the camera so I took a quick glance at it. The lens flashed again. "Alright, look at the top light again."
Another flash...
"That's it, now the bottom one."
And another bright flash... The cheetah paused in deep thought, took a deep breath, and then exhaled. Finally, he turned to the rhino in charge, and solemnly nodded.
"Okay, got it."
Well, that was fast.
The officers grabbed a hold of me and led me out the door. Just like that, we were all finished with the mugshots. Never in my life had I done a single mugshot until this very moment. I had to admit, we finished that photo op in less than 70 seconds and that couldn't be a coincidence.
Now they had my photo. The very thing I fought so hard to avoid. How was I not freaking out about this? Normally, I'd be fretting but I felt too relaxed for some unexplainable reason. Was it because I already admitted defeat? The tranquilizer liquid from earlier, perhaps? There was something internally wrong with me but I couldn't grasp why. Apathy was a possibility or my body was merely kicking into a 'whatever' status for lack of a better term.
I'm going to regret this, I thought. Technically, I already regretted many things but I knew further regret would follow suit.
We moved through a series of passageways that started off fancy - wooden doors, wooden panels, soft lights, and tree plants - until they eventually transitioned into practical - iron doors, grey bricks, long fluorescent lights - as we moved deeper into the back of the police station.
Every step I took made a metallic echo whereas the SWAT officers hardly made any sounds with their padded steps. I felt much like a robot marching along these corridors and the officer's ears kept perking up as if they were trying to adjust to a new alien creature in captivity.
We came to a dead-end with a wide steel door and we stopped in front of it while the rhino officer pulled out a large set of keys.
With slight difficulty, he slid the heavy door open and directed us inside. There were a number of smaller rooms but the one he took us to was as typical as anyone could get. The interrogation room.
It had one metal table, two metal chairs, and one glass mirror with a one-way view. Since Zootopia was nothing like my world, I initially found this room to be decent and manageable. However, it was awfully small and bordered by thick concrete walls. The jackals sat me down, cuffed me to the chair, double-checked the restraints to ensure they were properly locked.
"Is he secure?"
They triple checked. "All set,"
"We've got him locked down, sir"
"He's not going anywhere."
"Good. Is the chief informed?"
"He's in a meeting sir but he's been made aware."
"Alright. Rally up the rest of the unit, head to the lobby,"
The jackals nodded and slowly filed their way out of the room. They peaked back to quadruple check that I was indeed secure but their grey boss gestured them away. The rhino glared intently at me and gave off a menacing presence.
...
"Interrogation's at 0900," the rhino grunted. "Step out of line, you deal with me,"
...
He waited for me to respond but I kept my head down and waited for him to leave. My previous encounter with a rhino officer didn't work out last time so I thought it wise to keep quiet and not ask for any more trouble.
Finally, the rhino left the room and closed the metal door behind him. He locked it down and on the other side, I could hear three more heavy-duty doors being locked as he stomped away.
Wait... Did that mean I'd be stuck here for the next seven hours? What was I supposed to do during that time?
For the next twenty-seven minutes, I sat as still as a marble statue and didn't move an inch. My body got restless so I rocked myself back and forth a couple of times as much as I could until it felt awkward. My arms were cuffed so I couldn't play drums with the table. The legs were also cuffed so I couldn't do any sort of tap dancing. My neck was free to rotate so I rolled my head around a few times until I became lightheaded.
Discouraged, I tilted my neck back but the bright ceiling light gave me a migraine so I tilted my head forward. However, one of the large chains around my chest obstructed my chin so I couldn't rest my head comfortably.
I slanted my neck to the left, felt comfortable for a while until I felt a slight strain. So I slanted my neck to the right. Likewise, I also felt the same strain but couldn't use my gauntlet to massage it. Not only that but my nose began to itch like crazy and I was powerless to do anything about it. Ever since I came to this world, I felt like the animal furs that freely floated in the air were a culprit to my minor allergies.
But that was completely manageable compared to how the rest of my body felt. Though, I gradually got better, sitting upright in a metal chair didn't provide the most ideal method of recuperation. If anything, it slowed the process. Everything still felt bruised from the chest down and reclining flat on the cold hard floor would've been preferable for the next couple of hours but I was locked in place and unable to adjust.
Come to think of it, my experience in the lobby felt similar to that one battle on Pandora. The aliens against the blue natives. At one point, the humans were winning, they had the technological advantage, and they had powerful mech suits with a state of the art design. Granted, they didn't have nanotech but the overall idea was the same.
The human victory was near and the natives stood no chance. However, nature decided to play the UNO card and that's when the Hammerhead Titanots came charging in, along with the rest of the animals of Pandora. The battle was no longer humans against aliens; rather, it was humans against animals and the humans lost miserably. Their clanky metal suits were no match against the extraterrestrial rhinos and, much like me, they flew across the battlefield and landed with a hilarious clonk.
But I, like the human general, wouldn't give up without a fight so we both stood up and declared, it's not over yet. However, what happened next? You guessed it. A random extraterrestrial female came out and saved the day. Like Judy, the native named Neytiri shot two projectiles at the alien invader and we both collapsed in defeat. If I recalled correctly, she shot two at Quaritch. How many did Judy shoot? And didn't Judy and Neytiri both have tails? Again, what a coincidence.
At least I didn't die though. Getting taken down by two tranquilizer darts felt lame but getting taken out by two arrows must've been an epic way to die.
Now I was losing my mind. I kept thinking about movies for the next hour and replaying them inside of my head. That Avatar movie series came out over 300 years ago and yet it became an all-time classic like the Wizard of Oz and the Godfather. A bit of a recycled plot for sure but the visuals were undeniably splendid for its time.
Speaking of splendid, I wished this room was the same.
It was dim, dull, dank, and definitely not like Pandora. Everything felt cramped, substandard, smelled like a zoo, and had paw prints all over the wall and the glass mirror from past animal suspects. I spotted a few deep claw marks along the tabletop and tried to guess which animal could've taken the time to make them. Whoever it might've been, the must've had way too much time on their hands. Or, in this case, paws. This room was indeed old, had a long history to it, and was only used for the worst animal suspects of Zootopia because it had severe boredom etched all over it.
All in all, it could've been worse but it also could've been better. At least the room had some character to it.
For the next half hour, I stared into the glass one-way mirror and wondered if anyone or anything was on the other side. My helmet's heat vision was disabled long before I landed on this world so all I had was a broken tool in my toolbox with no chance of it being fixed. My reflection gave off an eerie appearance, especially with the flickering light fixture above me, and I could only imagine what the animals here thought of me.
My eyelids grew heavy but the bright light didn't help much with my desire to sleep. I preferred to doze off in either pitch-black environments or under the stars but I wouldn't be getting either one of those tonight. Thus, all I could do was wait until morning. My stomach growled, my throat grew dry, and my bruised body became restless as the minutes passed.
Goodness, this was going to be a long night.
Silence took over the room and the only sounds I could hear were the buzzing electricity from the lights, my throat swallowing, and my heart beating. Seven minutes passed but nothing happened.
...
...
...
One of the ceiling air vent covers suddenly fell to the floor, making a loud clanking sound.
"What the...?" I muttered.
This caused me to jump slightly and I had no idea what just happened.