Sally stepped out of a car full of giggling ladies.
"I'll see you all tomorrow!" she shouted as she waved goodbye to the moving car. She and the girls all went to the movies to watch a musical. It was the most fun Sally had in weeks. A little break from the everyday stresses. She was still singing the catchy finale song as she walked down the drive towards her house. As she reached the front door the carefree bliss slowly left her, replaced with the empty feeling of a broken marriage. No doubt Michael also had fun that night. And, assuming he hasn't passed out drunk, he'll want more fun when she got back. Sally knew that inside Michael was a good man; the man she married and signed her freedom off to. She still remembered how he dazzled her when they first met, the courteous, perfect boy every girl dreamed of dating. But, his drink got in the way. And now the memory of an affectionate husband was exactly this- a simple heartbreaking memory. When exactly did she realise their marriage went so wrong? Everything happened so quickly, a marriage proposal on a 3rd date was hardly common nowadays. Yet Sally was as keen to get hitched as he was. She wanted something to call her own. That was it.
Sally released the last pent up breath of the chilly evening air and opened the door. At once, she knew that something bad happened by the lack of a slurred greeting. This alone wouldn't have surprised her, it was common for Michael to be in bed by evening. In bed, on the floor, on the couch, in the bathtub, wherever. But Sally also heard a quiet whimpering coming from the living room and it was this that made her race across the hall, her heels clattering on the marble floor. She could have recognised that gentle sound of her 7 year old daughter anywhere. She gasped in horror. Michael lied on his back, passed out on the floor, this was no news. Neither was the stench of liquor and sweat, nor the upset furniture and piles of junk and bottles on the floor. Sally simply stepped over him to the small heap on the floor behind an armchair. Tears washed across her face as she looked at another, this one crumpled with pain, with blood spread across her childish features.
"Amy, I'm so sorry," Sally cried as she picked up the girl carefully, unsure of the damage. She felt a little comfort when her daughter buried her little bloodstained face in her mother’s neck and wrapped her arms around her.
Sally’s despair quickly turned to rage. He promised to look after her.
“Get up you fat shit!” she screamed in hysteria, kicking Michael violently. Her motherly nature instantly kicked in and made her feel awful about swearing in front of Amy. She whispered her apologies to the confounded girl, stroking her hair in quick erratic motions, tripping over empty bottles. Michael moaned in response, but Sally was already rummaging through the drawers for her Cadillac keys, with Amy on her hip, crying quietly. She didn't want an ambulance. She didn’t know the damage and didn’t want to cause a scene either. The last thing she needed right now was to wake up the neighbours. Mrs Jackson from next door was already suspicious over the amount of glass waste the household was producing. Before leaving she opened up a window to let in fresh air. There is always time for good housekeeping she thought. Sally swiftly closed the door behind her and rushed to the car. She placed Amy in the seat next to her and drove.
“I’m sorry,” she said, wiping tears from her face to clear her vision. “I’m so sorry. It won’t happen again I promise”.
Sally tried to collect herself together and look civil for the few bored people in the waiting room. She still didn’t know what happened to Amy, only that she wasn’t in a critical condition. She blinked her eyes numerous times to stop tears from falling. She covered the bloodstains Amy left on her dress with her cardigan. She neatly placed her hands on her knees to stop her legs from twitching. She fought a personal battle to keep her nails bite-free. She smoothed her long skirt, re-arranged her hair, and refused to nervously fiddle with her gloves.
However, Sally was a mess all the same.
She wanted to see her little girl, to comfort her and to feel Amy wrap her tiny arms around her neck knowing everything will be alright, now that mummy’s here. She could handle just about anything, pull off just about any stunt, come up with just about any cover story, but when it came to her daughter something touched her heart in the way that made Sally the vulnerable, lonely woman she truly was. All defences broken, all lies and tricks washed away.
Sally just wanted to keep her safe. But most of all Sally wanted to kill that sore excuse of a husband. This would be the last time she let him break her trust. And he can forget about any of his alcohol. She’s going to pour it down the drain first thing tomorrow. Well, maybe she’ll keep a bottle or two for guests, but that is going to be under lock and key. He will never lay a hand on Amy again. He will regret the day he first put his glass to his lips. Sally was shaking violently now, without even realising. The bastard. How dare he taint the only good thing they shared? Their daugher. But what could she do? Leave him? And what then? Go home, disgraced and ashamed just like her sister Frances? Never. Forget about any of his alcohol, that’s rich, she thought. She couldn’t make him do anything. She groaned and collapsed her head in her lap. She was so stuck.
“Scuse me ma’am. Are you alright?”
Sally looked up, startled. A tall man stood above her, holding his hands together awkwardly.
“Only, you looked like you might need some company.” The man explained.
Sally looked at him with bewildered eyes.
“You’re waiting for someone.” he noted. “Do you know if they’re gonna be ok?”
“I...I don’t.” she stuttered. The gentleman smiled sadly, took a step forward and sat down on a chair beside her.
“Yeah me either. But, it’s… it’s actually a fairly common occurrence for me so…eh, nevermind… ” the man trailed off.
Sally’s interest peaked a little. Could it be she wasn’t the only one hiding something from the world? This was clearly a topic the man didn’t want to talk about.
“Anyway, I’m Jack Cranford.” He smiled, holding out his hand. Sally examined him. Neat, blond hair, dark blue suit. Big sun-tanned hands and deep blue eyes asking her to trust him. Not forcefully like everyone else. Everyone else expected her to trust them. The man asked quietly. As if he was pleading to be acquainted. But why? This whole situation seems a little out of context. Sally was entangled in his glance, wide-eyed, and embarrassingly unable to look away. There was something in those eyes- a peculiar freshness.
“I’m Sally White” she said, reluctantly shaking his hand, and finally peeling her eyes off him. She had to get a grip on herself. She couldn’t just go around inviting strange men into her life, despite that little part of her that maybe wanted to. She had to be the grown up in the household and bear the weight of this responsibility. He could only bring trouble.
“What’s your angle mister?”
The man opened his mouth, offended, then closed it and shook his head smiling.
“Look, I’m just offering a little company, a shoulder to cry on, a helping hand. How often do you accept that ?”
Sally frowned. The guy got her. Sally was as independent as a housewife could be. But she always considered it a plus.
“I don’t really need helping hands much” Sally answered coldly, raising her chin. This wasn’t what she wanted to talk about at all. She didn’t mean to be rude or anything, but she’d rather the man just went away. “Helping hands are nosy.” She added.
Jack seemed to find that funny. He smirked to himself.
“Only when someone has something to hide.” he said.
Sally was furious-this wasn’t how she expected to be treated. She didn’t want his help, or his company. She didn’t want him at all! Suddenly her fury turned into half-crazed laughter. Well, he was right on the money about that. The things she had to hide, the things she was hiding from him, the things she would hide until she died. As for his creepy comments: she was married! Couldn’t he see the ring on her finger? Sally froze for a moment. She wished he couldn’t. She actually truly wished she wasn’t married. For all the crap Michael gave her, she always thought of everything from the positive side, that things will get better. That she, Michael and Amy would just be a happy family. That this was just a rough patch that would heal and get better. Now she could see things how they really were. Hopeless. She clenched her face with her hands, bent her head towards her knees, and wept.
“Oh... I... I’m sorry.” Jack whimpered in the background. “I ...Didn’t mean to...”
Sally didn’t reply. She couldn’t care any less about his awkward apologies. It wasn’t his fault anyway. Jack slowly placed his hand on her bent back and patted her a couple of times. And to her own surprise Sally turned to him and put her head on his shoulder, her hands still covering her upset face. He wrapped his arms around her supportively and rocked her gently from side to side. When she cried so loud it was audible, he stroked her head slowly until she calmed down. “It will be ok.” he whispered. I’ll be just fine.”
“You don’t know.” Sally protested.
“The doctors here are very good, you know. This is the best hospital in the state.” Jack reassured her.
She lifted her head to look at him.
“It isn’t just that” She admitted. She drew back away from him. This wasn’t appropriate. Very comforting and calming, but inappropriate.
“You wanna talk about it?” Jack asked reassuringly.
Sally shook her head and folded her arms into her lap modestly. She was a little embarrassed at her outburst. Just crying on a guy like that. But year here he was, still taking to her, still listening.
“Come on, this is a hospital. It’s where people get better.” Jack reclined on his seat.
“Oh and you are a surgeon?” Sally joked, taken back by her own lightheartedness.
“I’m not saying that I am. But I have saved a man’s life before.” he said seriously. Sally got the impression his response didn’t go the way he planned it as he stared out at the blank space in front of him, as if frozen. A secret, a lie, Sally thought. She wasn’t the only one.
“So.” Suddenly Jack sprung back into life. “What is it?”
Sally shook her head.
“My life is a lie.” She said nonchalantly. “And I hate it.”
“Life’s difficult” Jack rested his elbows on his knees and looked at Sally. She laughed.
“Yeah. It is a bit”
“But there are things worth living for, right?”
Amy.
“Worth fighting for?”
Her dear, sweet daughter.
“Yeah. You have to just make it through.” Sally nodded. “Have you ever just… held onto something that’s not worth holding onto? When it doesn’t even exist but you still live by it, hoping one day it will happen, it’ll come true, despite knowing it won’t? It drives you insane, but you just can’t let go, because it’d be even worse. That, is not worth living for.”
“Hm.. I…” Jack seemed lost for words.
“It’s ok.” Sally said, putting a hand on his shoulder. “I don’t expect you to have all the answers.”
Jack smiled at her, beaming false confidence and humour.
“The least you can expect from a problem surgeon”
Sally laughed, and realised her hand was still on Jack’s shoulder. She coughed, and drew it away.
“Sally White?” A doctor called. Her heart stopped.
“Yes?”
“Would you like to come through?”
Sally was already up on her feet.
“Goodbye then” Jack waved.
Sally gave him a quick thoughtless wave as she left the room.
“How is she doctor?”
“Fine. Just fine” He smiled reassuringly.
Sally let out a huge sigh of relief. She remembered Jack.
“Excuse me just a moment.” she said and made her way back to the waiting room. Jack was mindlessly flicking through a leaflet.
Sally gently put a hand on his shoulder.
“It’s ok.” She said quietly.
Jack’s face formed into the most honest, geniune smile.
“That’s great.”
Sally took his hand and shook it.
“Thank you. For evertyhing.”
“My pleasure.”
Sally gave him a final nod, and left quickly and without looking back just like the first time.