(This is not my chapter and the credit of the characters goes to their respective authors)
It was a late Sunday night and Tony Stark was lounging on his couch, watching Percy pull on his leather jacket to head down stairs. Despite the drinks they'd consumed over the past few hours, his friend's steps were strong and certain as he pulled on his shoes. "Do you really have to go?" Tony whined to the bartender. "Your room is ready as always."
"Yes Tony," Percy said, smirking at the billionaire. Tony was more than a little bit tipsy, though not completely wasted, and it showed in his change of personality. "Some of my regulars want to rent out the bar tomorrow, and I have to get up early to set it up."
"Poo." Tony pouted, and finished the last of his glass of beer. "How about the night after tomorrow? I heard there's a new bar opening in the East side that's supposed to be good, we can go see it. You know, check out your competition?" Tony waggled his eyebrows.
Percy paused at the doorway, a bashful look on his face. "Eh, sorry, I have something going on."
"What, is it a date?" Tony asked jokingly, poking fun at his friend's expression.
The way Percy rubbed the back of his neck and quickly exited the room gave him all the answers he'd ever need.
"Whaaaat?" Tony shot off the couch but only managed to stumble around the coffee table before he face planted. Well aware of the speeds Percy could reach when he rushed, the genius rolled over and shouted to the ceiling, "JARVIS! Where's Percy?"
"I believe he has already left the building, sir, and is being driven home by Mr. Godfrey at the moment." The AI replied.
"Goddamn!" Tony swore loudly as he cautiously picked himself up, scowling at the bottles of beer that had left him inebriated. Well, he couldn't bother Percy now; the bartender would just rip him a new one about pulling him back after he'd left for a stupid (in Percy's opinion, but not Tony's) reason.
Oh well. He'd just have to corner him the next time he saw Percy, and maybe force some truth serum down his throat if he had to.
Little did Tony know that the next chance he'd get would late enough that he'd have to resort to desperate measures.
————
"Sir," 'Happy' Hogan, Tony Stark's personal driver, said from his employer's side, "what exactly are we doing?"
"We, Happy, are spying." Tony said flamboyantly, gesturing with his binoculars to the busy street below.
"Well, I know that sir, but why are we here spying on Mr. Jackson?"
"Hush Happy, I don't pay you to ask these questions."
"No but Pepper does. So, we really are here because Mr. Jackson skipped out of going to bar together and that you think it's because of a date?"
Tony put down his binoculars and glared at his driver mutinously. He was dressed in his usual worn jeans and slightly oil-stained ACDC shirt, hair a disarray and hands clutching the binoculars.
"I don't think; I know."
Happy sighed. "Boss, I think Mr. Jackson really doesn't need you spying on him. His love life existed before you came along, so he can take care of himself."
"But who knows how many times he's been heartbroken, left to die alone by those heartless fools?" Tony pouted, waving the binoculars wildly.
Happy sighed and was about to launch himself into a lecture regarding over protectiveness and invading privacy when something on the street below caught his eye. "Oh, look, it's Mr. Jackson."
Tony's head snapped to look down in the direction his driver was gazing in. Indeed, there was Percy, though he seemed a little different than usual. Instead of his usual scuffed shorts or khakis and plain blue or green t-shirt, he was wearing slim black jeans and a crisp green polo, one that accentuated his tanned skin and eyes. His hair, while still messy, was a little more organized, and he was wearing leather shoes.
He had dressed up, obviously, and Tony knew why.
"A date! A date! See, Happy, told you that's what it was! Why else would Perce dress nice!" Wiggling gleefully in place on the roof, Tony chortled proudly. His driver just rolled his eyes and watched his employer's friend walk down the road, stopping at a small alleyway. "Sir, he's pulling a motorcycle out of a storage unit."
"Ah! Quick, Happy, to the Starkmobile!" Tony shot up and scrambled down the dubiously-creaking fire escape, which led to the side street where the aforementioned silver Mercedes was parked.
With a sigh Happy climbed in after Tony and started the car, pulling onto the main road just in time to start tailing Percy. The green-eyed man passed through the traffic, with Tony and Happy following with a bit more difficulty but still close by. He stopped outside a nice restaurant and parked his motorcycle in a conveniently close spot. It took Happy a few minutes and lots of ruthless cutting off but he wrangled a parking spot and they quickly jumped out to hurry after him. Luckily, Percy was still standing at by the doors, obviously waiting for his date, whoever it was.
Stashing themselves behind a nicely placed crepe stand - the purple-haired employee shot them a glance, but didn't comment - they watched in anticipation. Despite himself, even Happy was a little curious.
Less than a minute later, Percy's face lit up as a sleek black car rolled to a stop in front him. The door opened, but do to the angle they were at Tony and Happy couldn't see the mysterious stranger. Percy opened his mouth, obviously to greet him, and Tony leaned forward to try to hear him say his date's name. But, unfortunately but not surprisingly, something just had to interrupt the moment.
And even more unsurprisingly, it was explosions and gunfire.
Well, maybe it was a little surprising. But Tony was rather used to that.
Percy hit the deck with the ease of long practice (which had always bothered Tony, because this was Percy and Percy didn't need to know how to dodge explosions and gunfire but he did anyway) but at the moment he couldn't help but be thankful for that odd skill. Not ten feet from the mysterious date's car, a Volkswagen Buggy went up in flames, and amiss the smoke Tony saw several figures dart about, wielding what he guessed were guns.
Percy scrambled to his feet, staying low, and conveniently fled in Tony and Happy's direction. He jumped, wide-eyed, when the billionaire reached out yanked him back by his shirt collar, pulling him into their little group.
"Tony?!" He spluttered, looking far more shocked than the genius had ever seen him. In his head Tony cheered at that little success (finally!) but he covered up his enthusiasm.
"Hey, Perce, uh, how's it going?" Tony gave his friend an unsure smile.
"What are you doing here?" Percy paused for a moment, and his green eyes narrowed in his famous glare that sent even the most muscular of drunken men scurrying from his bar. "Were you stalking me?"
"No, of course not!"
"Happy?"
"Yes, Mr. Jackson."
"Tony!" Percy whacked his friend over the head just as he exclaimed, "Happy!" Any further arguments were drowned out by the sound of more gunfire. Percy scowled and peeked over the crepe stand, muttering, "I really hate guns. And terrorists. They just had to interrupt my date."
"Ah, about that. Is your date okay? Like, not riddled with holes?" Tony asked a bit awkwardly. It would suck if his friend's girlfriend/boyfriend (he didn't know which) was dead before he could even interrogate them.
"He's fine. This kind of stuff has... happened before." Percy slid his hand into his pocket as he spoke, and Tony knew the bartender was fiddling with the pen he always had on him. It was tick he had, playing with the writing utensil whenever he was pissed off or nervous. Only Tony couldn't which one was plaguing Percy right now.
"So what should we do?" Happy asked, slightly disconcerted by his boss' and the other man's easy discussion while more bullets cracked concrete and windows.
"Well I don't know what you're gonna do, but I'm going to find my date." Percy said, throwing them a short glare before bursting out from the cover of the crepe stand to jump through one of the shattered windows of the restaurant.
Tony made to lunge after him, but the spray of gunfire tailing Percy forced him to duck back behind the stand. "Shit!" Growling, he watched his best friend disappear into the swirling dust. Struggling to squint through the sight-obscuring cloud, he muttered to himself , "I really need to work on those vacuum grenades."
"Sir!" Happy's excited call made Tony look over his shoulder at his driver. The other man was pointing to an alley a little ways off. There was a door leading to the very same building Percy had darted into; it was probably the kitchen's back door. It was a short sprint's distance, but once they got into the alley they'd be sheltered from any stray gunfire that may come their way.
"Nicely done Happy!" Clapping his driver's shoulder, Tony readied himself. "Shall we go on three? Ready: three!"
Happy jerked in surprise as his boss burst out from behind the crepe stand but quickly followed, both managing to scramble into the alley just ahead of the bullets that spat at their heels.
"What the hell were you thinking?" Happy asked, hands braced on his knees as he panted. His heart was racing with adrenaline, feeling like it'd leap out of his chest any second. Tony grinned from his spot against the wall opposite his driver, hand clutching at his thundering chest and eyes bright.
"I wasn't really," he admitted and wiped his sweaty palms on his denim jeans. "But it got us here right?"
"Honestly I wonder how I still work for you, sir."
"You love me, Happy." Tony took a deep breathe and approached the door to the restaurant. Happy reluctantly followed his boss and together they wrenched open the heavy door. Inside was an empty kitchen, no doubt already evacuated as soon as the fighting had started. Dust swirled across the counters and the sounds of attack were muffled, thanks to all the walls between them and the conflict on the street.
Tony did wonder about that; was it odd that the gunfire and explosions had started as soon as Percy's date had stepped out of the car? And that the mysterious man who'd caught his friend's attention had effortlessly escaped the chaos into the safety of the restaurant? And that the assailants had focused fire on both Percy and his date without problem?
... Now that he thought about it, it didn't my seem like that much of a coincidence. It was just like Percy to end up with someone who called for just as much chaos as Percy found amusing. The bartender always claimed that a calm effortless life was a fruitless and boring one. Stood to reason that his chosen partner would live up to those standards too.
He just really hoped the mysterious man wasn't a mafia boss or anything.
"Sir?" Happy exchanges glances with the billionaire playboy. Letting out a harsh breathe, Tony ripped a strip of cloth off his T-shirt and ties it over his mouth, Happy doing the same. Taking a step into the lonely kitchen, he muttered, "The things I do for you, Perce. This is even worse than the four thousand dollar Persian carpet and bottle of vodka incident."
And the door swung shut behind them.
————
Five minutes later Tony decided that he was never coming back to this restaurant again, if it still stood at the end of the day. "Who the hell designed this damn place?" He growled, narrowly avoiding stumbling into an inconveniently placed bar stool.
A thump and a hissed curse indicated that Happy had failed to do the same with the table off to the right. "What I want to know is who blew the electricity, so I can punch their lights out."
Stretching his hands out in front him in the dark, Tony snorted in agreement. After only two minutes in the restaurant, Happy and Tony had found themselves thrown into darkness to stagger through the maze of crooked tables, chairs and bar counters. There was just enough murky light, fed from the in a few other rooms, for them to see each other's outlines, but not so much the obstacles in their way.
A harsh slam to his shin later, Tony struggled to the doorway of the fourth and final dining room and peered around the corner. Down the 'employee hallway' was the worker lounge, the most reinforced room, and no doubt where Percy would go to wait out the attack.
Tony turned back to Happy and their eyes met. "Percy's probably down here."
"So what're we gonna do when we find him, sir?"
"Grab him and get the hell out. His date can take of himself for all I care." Tony rolled his eyes and made to turn around. "Now, where is - Jesus!"
The billionaire jumped almost a foot in the air when he can face to face with an imposing figure. It was too gloomy to make out their features, but Tony got the distinct feeling of strength and power as he looked at the man. He was wearing dark clothes and seemed to have chocolate coloured skin, but other than that he could see nothing.
"You know Percy?"
The dark voice tickled a familiar memory but Tony couldn't place it, nor would he try to in this mess. "Yeah," he said warily. Recognition dawned a moment later and he straightened from the fighting stance he'd unconsciously sank into. "You're Perce's date!"
"Took you long enough," came the acidic reply. "What're you doing here?"
"I'm Percy's best friend, of course I'll be here," he said, not really answering the question.
The man snorted, but didn't bother asking for more information. "You said Percy came in here?" His voice became a little gruffer when he spoke of Percy, but it wasn't a bad gruff. More like a... concerned gruff that he didn't want to admit.
Tony smiled. Aw man, Perce had this guy wrapped around his finger.
"Yes. We saw him run in ten minutes or so ago." Happy was the one to answer the inquiry, because Tony was obviously distracted by deep thoughts, if his satisfied smirk was anything to go by.
The man paused then spun on his heel and strode down the hallway to the staff lounge. Tony started at the abrupt movement but hurried after him, leather shoes clacking softly. "Do you know anything about the attackers? Perce mentioned that this 'has happened before' or something."
The brown skinned man didn't even stop to think about the question. "Why are you following me?"
"Because he's just as much my best friend as he is your boyfriend." Tony glared at the man's back, hoping against all odds that maybe his gaze would cause his heart to stop. Or maybe a stray bullet would do the job. He could live with that too.
"Shut it, Stark." The man growled. Tony would have jerked in surprise at the fact that the man knew who he was (not of his identity, really, but more the fact that he could tell in this damn dark) if Perce's boyfriend hadn't stuck his arm out and dragged him back behind a corner, Happy instinctively following. They were just in time, too, because four men in gray carrying hand pistols hurried past them, heading in the same direction as they were. Namely, the staff lounge. Where Percy was.
"Well shit," Tony swore softly. The man grunted what seemed to be an agreement and reached under his coat, withdrawing a hand gun from his belt. He took off down the hallway without hesitation, and Tony found himself nervously following.
Damn. That mafia don idea was really becoming a possibility. Now, was it a good thing or a bad thing with all the trouble Percy got himself into normally?
The sound of surprised yells jerked him from his thoughts, and Tony realized that they had already come to the half-open door of the staff lounge. The three men quickly burst into the room, Mystery Man brandishing his gun and Tony with his fists up. Tony was only a little surprised to see Percy wailing on the attackers already, with - was that a sword? Oh, no it was just a bat. A strange bronze-y kind of bat that he doubted had come from anywhere in the lounge, but the point was that Percy had a bat and he making use of it. Two men were already lying on the floor, blood dripping down their faces and eyes rolled back in their heads.
Happy was quick to elbow one of the men in the back as he tried to turn and face them, and with the ease of years of practiced coordination Tony smashed his face in with a nicely place kick. A quick chop to the back of neck from the driver and their target joined the others on the ground.
Mystery Man's fight was far less dramatic, involving little more than a gunshot and a cut-off yell, and then he was rushing over the body to where Percy stood, wiping small blood splatters from his hands. The green-eyed man was quickly swept up in a hug, and while Tony couldn't be too sure because he was a bit distracted by the awkwardness of seeing someone intimately hug his best friend, but he could have sworn that the bat disappeared just a moment later. Of course, such minor details weren't all that important in the face of the questions he had now, so he stowed them away for later.
Sidling up to the pair, Tony pointedly cleared his throat and said, "Hey Perce, still standing here, you know."
Emerald eyes opened and glared at the billionaire over Mystery Man's shoulder. "Then leave," he said flatly.
"Hey, is that any way to treat your best friend?" Tony pouted and clutched at his chest liked he was hurt by his friend's comment.
"A best friend that stalked me on a date." Percy's glares sharpened.
At least Tony was a little abashed at that. He rubbed the back of his neck and laughed awkwardly. "That's what best friends do?" He offered.
Percy closed his eyes with an explosive sigh and let his head drop down onto Muster Man's shoulder. He withdrew from the other's man embrace with a soft pat to the shoulder and faced Tony. He held Tony's stare for a moment, then looked to Happy and asked, "Do you have a phone? We should probably call someone to get rid of the bodies." He gestured to the ones strewn on the ground around them.
"Uh, yeah. Here, Mr. Jackson." The driver quickly handed the man his phone, seeing that he was in no mood to be trifled with.
The green-eyed man took it and went to a quiet corner to make the call, leaving Tony and Mystery Man to each other's tender mercies. Tony, of course, was the one to take advantage of the situation. "So," he tilted his head curiously, "what's your name, mystery-man-who-is-dating-my-best-friend-for-who-knows-how-long?"
"I would've thought you knew, Mr. Stark."
Ah damn, that voice, why was it so familiar? It seemed to spark a fire of annoyance, frustration and mild resentment in him. How curious.
"At least a first name?" Tony pried, making a vague 'come on, come on' gesture with his hand. "It wouldn't hurt right?"
"With you it would, Mr. Stark. Don't try to downplay your information network."
Happy watched the exchange uncomfortably, shifting from foot to foot as he looked back and forth between the two men. In the gloom, he couldn't really see their faces but he could sense the bubbling challenge in both their words, no matter how innocent they seemed.
Clearing his throat, he pointed a thumb at a door with the words "Electrical Room" on it. "Uh, I'm gonna go and try to get the lights back online," he said, edging to the door as he tried to escape everyone's attention. He quickly disappeared behind it and turned to focus on the switches and wires, tuning out the not-argument going on outside the room. It didn't take him long to find the right one, and with a heave he flipped the restarter switch.
There was a great 'whoo' as the generator and the grid started going again and the lights flickered on. To Happy it was a good thing, but outside the room for Tony...
Well, before that day Tony had thought it was illogical for cartoons to describe their characters' jaws to hit the ground. Now he understood the sentiment.
After a moment of silence, he pointed a finger at the dark-skinned man before him and managed to say, "I fucking know you!"
"I should hope so, Mr. Stark," Nick Fury, Director of S.H.I.E.L.D. and someone Tony was unfortunately acquaintances with, smirked at the open-mouthed billionaire in front of him. "If you didn't I'd be slightly worried about your mental state."
Tony huffed, having recovered a little of his normal persona. "Hey, I'll have you know my mental capacities are just fine!"
But of course, inside Tony was screaming his head off. Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? No way! That mafia don idea is looking a lot better right now!
"Tony. Nick. No fighting." Percy's voice cracked like a whip and both men cringed, stares for once leaving each other to gaze at the ceiling or their shoes innocently. Percy stalked past them, a reluctant smile on his face as he went to the hallway. Happy hurriedly bolted ahead of them, anxious to get out of the awkward atmosphere. "Someone will be here to stall the police and clean up the bodies. We have to leave right now."
The two men trailed behind him, still exchanging glares - one that of an overprotective best friend and the other one of a pissed off lover. Neither dared to say anything, because Percy was still in front of them and damn he could be scary, but their looks said it all for them.
As they left the building the same way they'd entered Toyn squinted against the harsh brightness and sighed. "Well damn," he said to Fury, "now I have to be nice to you."
Fury snorted but didn't say anything, merely slipping an arm around Percy's waist with a raised eyebrow. Tony got the message quick enough, but he narrowed his eyes at Percy. "Fine, fine, I'll leave you two to go find a date somewhere else, now that I know who exactly it is you're dating, but we're gonna have a talk when you get. Whenever. Wherever." With that Tony spun on his heel and made for the main street, Happy following uncertainly behind him. As they reached the exit of the alley, Tony paused and pointed two fingers to his eyes, then back at Fury, the inevitable 'I'm watching you,' gesture and continued on his way.
Happy walked alongside his boss and asked uncertainly, "Are you really that against their relationship, sir?"
Tony almost tripped at the question. "What? No! No, Percy's life is still his own and he seems happy. So even if I'm not a huge fan of that bastard, I'll try and," he shuddered here, "get along with Fury. 'Cause that's what'll make him happy. And that's all that matters to me. If his 'happy place' is with the pirate director of a dangerous spy-and-super-hero organization, then hey, I'll back him. Least their relationship will never be boring," he said with a shrug.
Happy seemed momentarily awed by his boss' willingness to put aside his dislike of Fury just so that his best friend's relationship could work and sat down at the wheel of the Starkmobile, musing over the words. Oblivious to his driver's temporary hero worship, Tony settled into his seat and propped his chin on his fist. He could only think one thing.
Maybe that mafia don thing wasn't that bad of an idea after all.