"I'm so sorry for being so careless. I didn't mean to hurt you."
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Jasper had been curled up in a ball on his bed for nearly 12 hours. Since getting back from the hospital, all he wanted to do was lay still and think of nothing. Jasper had been crying so hard leading up to the fateful last breath of his grandma, that now she was gone, he felt like he had nothing left. Jasper felt empty and numb.
He had not eaten for a while. The lure of food hadn't even tempted him out of his room and he knew he was no support to his mother, who needed someone to lean on, but Jasper just couldn't do it.
He could hear the faint sound of a car pulling up outside of the house and doors closing. He could hear his uncle's booming voice and thought he could hear Thomas' too, but decided his mind was playing tricks on him.
It isn't long before he hears footsteps pad up the stairs and sure enough a knock on his door, his mother no doubt, wanting to coax him out of his room again.
But when he hears the knock a second time, followed by "Jasper?...it's Tom." His eyes immediately begin to tear up. Jasper remembers his last moments with his grandmother, when he had confessed his thoughts and her words of wisdom. Jasper now knew he owed it to his grandmother, to Thomas, and to himself to make things right.
Jasper approaches the door and unlocks the sliding bolt. He slowly turns the handle and opens the door to see Thomas stood in front of him with his bag. Jasper doesn't speak, just moves a little to the side to allow Thomas to enter.
Thomas gets the hint and slowly enters the room, placing the bag on Jasper's bed. They then just stand opposite each other, both having so much to say, but neither knowing exactly where to start.
Eventually, Thomas makes the first move. "Jasper...I'm really sorry for everything. For your loss, for our argument... " Thomas tails off a little looking down on himself, suddenly feeling a little awkward.
Jasper reaches out and grabs both of Thomas' wrists and slowly pulls him close. When he is close enough, he lets go and wraps his arms around Thomas' waist and rests his chin on Thomas' shoulder.
Thomas slowly but surely puts his own arms around Jasper's shoulders and slowly starts to comfort the younger by patting his back and stroking the back of his head.
Jasper now breaks down, setting his tears free. His hold around Thomas is getting tighter.
For a few moments they stay like this, with Thomas unable to keep himself from joining in with Jasper's tears. Jasper finally pulls apart, his face puffy from crying, he uses the sleeve of his top to wipe his nose. Jasper glances up at Thomas who catches the gaze and doesn't hesitate to raise a hand and catch a stray tear with his thumb, brushing it over his cheek.
Jasper again grabs one of Thomas' wrists and pulls him towards the bed to sit down. Now both seated, Jasper finally speaks. "T Tom ..." Jasper's breathing still a little jumpy. "I'm so sorry for being so careless. I didn't mean to hurt you."
Thomas can feel an unexpected warm glow surge inside of him. He automatically takes Jasper's hand and squeezes it. "It's ok." Is all he says. He leans closer and kisses Jasper's head.
Jasper tries to compose himself a little more. He clears his throat and swallows hard before continuing. "B...before grandma died, I had one last conversation with her. I told her about how I was feeling about things, about you and...and she told me to tell you...to say it.'' Jasper lets out a hot blow of air. He looks up to Thomas' face, catching his beautiful eyes. "Thomas... I think I'm in love with you and I know it's silly and we won't see each other for much longer but..."
Thomas catches Jasper's lips. A tender kiss, then he pulls away, leaving Jasper a little breathless. "Jasper, I think I'm in love with you too." Thomas blurts out as if the words have been on the tip of his tongue for the longest time.
Jasper looks at Thomas momentarily, his eyes hypnotize him. He pulls Thomas close by his sweater, their lips touching again. Soon Jasper is pulling Thomas on top of him as Jasper slowly lays back on his bed. Thomas cages Jasper, looking down on him with a soft smile, as he leans in again and catches his lips. He is slow and gentle. Each connection laced with love and affection.
Jasper looks up at the man hovering over him. He had never felt this way before. Thomas looked so beautiful over him. Jasper knew at that moment he needed to feel Thomas. He needed him close. "Tom." Jasper looks up at the older. Thomas smiles down at him, but his face soon changes when he hears the next line...
"I want you to fuck me."